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Autism - Support Across the Spectrum Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

Ok...so here it all is and any information is greatly appreciated.

My Autistic son is 8 and my daughter is 5. By the time baby number 3 enters the world they will be 9 and 6. I realized just the other day that ALL my efforts are in my son and I have been "neglecting" in a sense my daughter in terms of being on her with her school work and development. On top of that I will eventually have a new baby. So I really need some sample daily routines or something to help guide me into making my own daily routines, and some advice on how to discipline myself to follow those routines so I can fit in time for everyone and accomplish what I need to. I am not a routine person on my own, that is a HARD task for me to implement on my own but I know for my son it is necessary and am starting to think it is necessary to so I can fit my daughter in there.

I also need some help on sleep aids for my son. He doesn't sleep well and often has bags under his eyes. And basically I just need to know where to start with this. While I have had the diagnosis for a while, I really have not reached a "starting point" at home with it. For years we paid attention to his first diagnosis of ADHD so now it is hard to change gears a bit. Essentially, I am overwhelmed with everything and could use some guidance on this I guess. THANK YOU ahead of time for just listening if that is all you do :)

by on Apr. 2, 2013 at 2:53 PM
Replies (11-19):
darbyakeep45
by Darby on Apr. 4, 2013 at 6:50 AM

Hugs mama!  I'm a routine person and we stick to a strict routine every day.  I'm a very particular person so this works for me and my son.  I wish you the best!

Clemency3
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 8:29 AM

Thank you to everyone. I certainly will look into the melatonin. 

mochamom0413
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 10:28 AM

Congrats on the new baby.  I understand how you feel.  My thirteen year old has Autism and he also had problems sleeping.  For years I have tried Melatonin, but as a result he only became immune to it and I had to keep upping the dosage; eventually discontinuing. Now my son goes to bed in his own room without any simulations (no tv,radio, games) at 8:30 pm. He will sleep until about 2am, and eventually dose back off at about 4:30 am and at 6am, I have to shake him to wake him up to get ready for school.

I found that having him go to bed early really helps.  He is no longer sleeping in class.

I also found that teaching my older son to do things on his own, gives me more time with the baby or for myself. For example: Our routine

Have him wash his face and brush his teeth alone (builds independence)

While he does that, you get out and iron clothes he needs for school but allow him space to put them on alone. When he finishes or before he leaves for school, you can just make the necessary adjustments to them. Hope this helps.


Good Luck






Macphee
by Bronze Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 11:29 AM

Take a breath clemency.

Its frustrating how doctors hand you this diagnosis, therapies, and resources, and then you have to map it all out. All kids, especially spectrum kids thrive on schedules. You have to identify what will help you stay on track. . . especially with baby 3 coming. The days that your son does not have therapies, focus on your daughter. Find what she loves to do, art, sports, dress-up, whatever and set some time everyday for her.

I also fell into this habit. You focus so much on getting what ASD kid needs, NT ones sometimes fall through the cracks.

Write a schedule down for yourself. Goal chart with a checklist to do some stuff.

Clemency3
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 12:08 PM


You are the second person on here to mention "therapies". My son does not go to therapy at all. The school provides him OT once a week on Tuesdays but that is it. What other kinds of therapy are being used?

Quoting Macphee:

Take a breath clemency.

Its frustrating how doctors hand you this diagnosis, therapies, and resources, and then you have to map it all out. All kids, especially spectrum kids thrive on schedules. You have to identify what will help you stay on track. . . especially with baby 3 coming. The days that your son does not have therapies, focus on your daughter. Find what she loves to do, art, sports, dress-up, whatever and set some time everyday for her.

I also fell into this habit. You focus so much on getting what ASD kid needs, NT ones sometimes fall through the cracks.

Write a schedule down for yourself. Goal chart with a checklist to do some stuff.



amonkeymom
by Amy on Apr. 4, 2013 at 4:10 PM

Yes.  I've found it at Super Target, Whole Foods, and the grocery store with vitamin supplements.

Quoting Clemency3:


Where do you get melatonin? Is it over the counter?

Quoting amonkeymom:

Welcome!  I totally understand being pulled in so many directions.  It helps me sometimes to write down what I need to do, what I want to do and just check things off... not saying that your daughter is something that you need to check off, but it might help with making the time to spend with her.

For sleep, my kids and I have been using melatonin when we feel that we are having trouble sleeping.  It's a natural supplement, something that your body makes anyway.




Macphee
by Bronze Member on Apr. 5, 2013 at 10:24 AM

 Depending on where his delays are, he should be able to also have private therapy. Has his pediatrician written referrals for him to be evaluated by a speech and language therapist, possible behavioral therapist, and he should have private OT on top of getting it in school.

Again depending on insurance and his delays, he should be able to get private therapy at least once a week. It is usually one on one. Ask his pediatrician for referrals for OT, speech and possibly behavioral. Then contact your insurance company about coverage. As long as he has the medical diagnosis on the spectrum, he has rights to all services necessary. You might also consider signing him up for SSI and getting in touch with Medicaid. I know that our private HMO required $40 copay for every visit. My son gets speech, OT and behavioral twice a week. $360 a week in copays. While he was getting considered for medicaid, I negotiated with his therapy provider to pay cash, which was $30 per therapy. This was for four months.

Quoting Clemency3:

 

You are the second person on here to mention "therapies". My son does not go to therapy at all. The school provides him OT once a week on Tuesdays but that is it. What other kinds of therapy are being used?

Quoting Macphee:

Take a breath clemency.

Its frustrating how doctors hand you this diagnosis, therapies, and resources, and then you have to map it all out. All kids, especially spectrum kids thrive on schedules. You have to identify what will help you stay on track. . . especially with baby 3 coming. The days that your son does not have therapies, focus on your daughter. Find what she loves to do, art, sports, dress-up, whatever and set some time everyday for her.

I also fell into this habit. You focus so much on getting what ASD kid needs, NT ones sometimes fall through the cracks.

Write a schedule down for yourself. Goal chart with a checklist to do some stuff.

 

 


 

Clemency3
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 12:02 PM


Yea I definitely will look into the behavior therapy. He doesn't need speech therapy or anything else because after being tested for his IEP they felt that, that area was fine. 

Quoting Macphee:

 Depending on where his delays are, he should be able to also have private therapy. Has his pediatrician written referrals for him to be evaluated by a speech and language therapist, possible behavioral therapist, and he should have private OT on top of getting it in school.

Again depending on insurance and his delays, he should be able to get private therapy at least once a week. It is usually one on one. Ask his pediatrician for referrals for OT, speech and possibly behavioral. Then contact your insurance company about coverage. As long as he has the medical diagnosis on the spectrum, he has rights to all services necessary. You might also consider signing him up for SSI and getting in touch with Medicaid. I know that our private HMO required $40 copay for every visit. My son gets speech, OT and behavioral twice a week. $360 a week in copays. While he was getting considered for medicaid, I negotiated with his therapy provider to pay cash, which was $30 per therapy. This was for four months.

Quoting Clemency3:


You are the second person on here to mention "therapies". My son does not go to therapy at all. The school provides him OT once a week on Tuesdays but that is it. What other kinds of therapy are being used?

Quoting Macphee:

Take a breath clemency.

Its frustrating how doctors hand you this diagnosis, therapies, and resources, and then you have to map it all out. All kids, especially spectrum kids thrive on schedules. You have to identify what will help you stay on track. . . especially with baby 3 coming. The days that your son does not have therapies, focus on your daughter. Find what she loves to do, art, sports, dress-up, whatever and set some time everyday for her.

I also fell into this habit. You focus so much on getting what ASD kid needs, NT ones sometimes fall through the cracks.

Write a schedule down for yourself. Goal chart with a checklist to do some stuff.







JavaMama110108
by on Apr. 5, 2013 at 12:10 PM
1 mom liked this

I have three children as well (7 month DS, 2 yrs DD, and 3 yrs DS) My oldest is the one wiht the diagnosis, and while most efforts are in him, I am lucky that his is fairly independent. The baby obviously commands a good amount of attention too, so I find myself giving in easily to DD's requests. Most of my time with her comes after the boys are asleep (she is my night owl) or sporadically for a few minutes through out the day. I am in the process of looking for some help with structuring my time too, so when I find something good, I will pass it along. Don't worry, you are doing your best and your kids know that you love them.

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