Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)


I am new to the community. I am lookinf for support and for people who can understand what I go through on a daily basis. When my son(now 6) was 2 years old we found out that he had a condition called VPI. That is where the soft palate is too short and greatly affects speech. At the age of 2 he had no non-verbal communication and very little verbal. He never babbled or cooed. Started smiling at 6 months and even then it was rare. We meet with a speech therapist who recognized the VPI and said possible Aspergers. We all kinda brushed off the Aspergers and blamed everythin on the VPI, which I really can't separate the symptoms of the two. When he was 4 the Dr agreed to do surgery. Now my son could talk understandabley. However we were still having problems and last summer they got worse to where we wanted to seek help. He has major meltdowns at the drop of a hat, spazzes out if things change, is super literal, doesn't get sarcasm or hummor. He has also started baby talking and mumbling lately, when I know he can soeak clearly. He had 4 years of speech therapy to do so. Mostly this is when he is nervous, shy, upset, sad... He chews on stuff when he is upset. Mostly his blue blankie and T shirts. He also dosent seem to understand certain thing and I have to phrase in a positive manner if it is something negative. He is high functioning, so I know it's not near what some deal with. That's a little background on my son, of course there is more. Over all he is a smart, cute little man and I love him like crazy, but at times I feel like I am hanging by a thread and at a loss at what to do. I also have an 8 year old daughter who is ADHD and I would rather deal with her than my son at their worse times. I know it sounds bad, her stuff is just easier.

Please feel free to leave your thoughts, suggestion, question or whatever. I am an open book. ;-)

by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 2:52 PM
Replies (11-16):
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 5:15 PM

LostinLove - thanks for responding. Good to know how similiar our boys are. Mine has a hard time self soothing and will just scream I can't stop crying, I can't stop it. He hate undies, socks, shoes, hair bushing, and gets super hot very easy. He complains and holds his ears if we are near him and hears us chewing. He doesn't like jeans, but he wears them because we made a deal with that and wearing underwear. I will try to check the book out. I need to do it before I go back to school. I am a third semester RN student, but do not know if I am going to be able to handle it.

dustykitty - thank you for your response too. I have talked to the teacher and tried to explain the SPD and asperger's, but I don't think she understands how Logan can be on the spectrum and still be high functing. She will say, well he has friends. He plays with the same two kids and basically only them. He knows he got a color change because he wasn't staying on task, but doesn't understand why, says he did nothing wrong. Maybe I need to sit down and explain. I have done a lot of research and have an instructor who has an 11yr ol with aspergers and she has been helpful. I know denial is a part of life and I know my husband will step up. He is trying to do stuff to help and he is trying to calmly talk to Logan, so I guess that's in the right direction. He says he just doesn't want Logan to get labled. I told him it didn't change what is. I do think what you said about men feeling that the kid is defective is true. My hubby said he never wanted a kid with autisim, but that was not our choice. I am learning that I actually love some of Logan's little quirks. Some of them are so cute. He takes things so literal and talks matter of factly.

by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 5:33 PM

Welcome!!  Praying for guidance, peace and wisdom for you . . . 

by Dawn on Apr. 4, 2013 at 6:56 PM

Welcome to the group! Have you considered taking him to a developmental pediatrician or a medical doctor who specializes in Autism? I found the doctor who diagnosed me with Asperger Syndrome through the state chapter of the Autism Society (


Group owner of Different Learners Support Group (

by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 8:36 PM

Yes, I have thought of a developmental pediatrician, but I have horrible insurance and it will not cover it. The closest one would be at least an hour away. We've only had 2 sessons with this therapist, who BTW is better than the one before. She does specialize in children like Logan and says he is a lot like her other Aspergers boys. She has 4 or 5 of them. She's really good and he's doing feeling charts and asking us to put the face on to show how we feel too. We've been working on his anger and meltdowns and teaching him it's ok to get angry, he thought it wasn't), he just has to learn different ways to control it. I am teaching him to use his quiet space as the therapist called it when he gets angry. The other day he ran from me after me telling him to watch his attitude (it had been one of those meltdown days). I went to check on him and he said, "I am cooling my attiude." I am going to talk to the therapist about a behaviorial Pedi though.

by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 10:42 PM

welcome , im joy

by Bronze Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 10:48 PM

 Yes, the Out of Sync Child is a great book. Carol Kranowitz has a few books out all worth taking a look at when you can.

Quoting LostInLove2002:

Hello darlin' and welcome! I'm fairly new here too. My ds who is 10 was recently diagnosed with Aspergers and SPD. Initially the SPD was misunderstood as ADHD and it's easy to do. Your son has MANY of the same symptoms as mine. Right down to the T shirt chewing. He says it makes him happy. :) It's a self soothing technique he has learned. I'm reading a book that I think will help you. I know, READING. Where to find the time, how to sort through what will help and so on. This is an EASY read and you'll see your ds in the pages right away. Very early on you'll get an education. It really sounds like he's got SPD with a side of Asperger's. ;) That's what I call it here. Please find and read "The Out of Sync Child" by Caol Stock Kranowitz M.A. You won't be sorry. In fact, within a few pages you'll be willing to break the arm of anyone messing with your book. HUGS to you and if I can help you in any way I'd love to. Like I said, reading about your child was like reading about mine.


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)