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I am the mom...(LONG, but raw, honest, & personal)

Posted by on May. 31, 2013 at 8:50 PM
  • 21 Replies
4 moms liked this

I am the mom...

I am Darby....mom to Brady...mom to a perfect little boy who is medically fragile with multiple disabilities...mom to a little boy who is 4.5 years old but functions at the level of a 13 month old.  

I am the mom that spoils her child rotten.  I am the mom who will buy him whatever he will truly enjoy as he doesn't play with most toys...he's very particular.  I am the mom who who will go out and purchase more than one just so we have a back up in case something happens to it.  

I'm the mom who gives her child a huge birthday party even though he truly has no idea what is going on around him.  I am the mom who takes her child to Target just so she can get him to eat.  I am the mom who goes to Target/Walmart/Food Lion/Commissary multiple times each week just to buy all the Gerber Sweet Potatoes/Turkey baby food as that is all her child will eat.  I am the mom who frequently forgets to feed her husband as her mind is so focused on feeding her child.  

I am the mom that makes a detailed meal plan for the week along with a corresponding grocery list, but manages to leave the list at home almost every time.  I'm the mom with the child that immediately squeals and screams loudly with delight and excitement when they walk into a store as bright lights, colors and open spaces excite him to the point that he tends to lose control of himself.  I am the mom who doesn't care if you stare at her child as he is THE cutest little boy on the planet, and she is extremely proud of him.

I'm the mom who does what works for HER child, and she could care in the least what you do with yours.  I'm the mom that fed her child breastmilk & formula, swaddled him, gave him pacifiers, and put him in cloth & disposable diapers.  I'm the mom who does not believe there is only one way to raise a child.  I'm the mom whose main priority is to raise a child to love Jesus and to love others.  

I'm the mom who knows it's not her kid's job to make her look good.  I'm the mom who is walking down the aisle at Target while feeding her almost 5 year old baby food.  I'm the mom who is well aware of the shocked look on your face as you stare at her child wondering why on the earth is a child that old is being spoon fed baby food by his mother.  I'm the mom who longs for the day when her child can orally consume enough calories and fluid so that she doesn't have to rely on his feeding tube to keep him healthy and alive.  I'm the mom who doesn't care if you stare in horror as her child is having a meltdown.  I'm the mom who doesn't care if you look at her child in shock as you see him with a blanket & pacifier after asking me how old he is.  I'm the mom who will not explain her child to you if you ask, "What's wrong with him?"  I'm the mom who will answer your questions about her child as long as you are respectful and genuine in your intentions.  

I'm the mom who is very involved her child's school, therapy, and activities.  I'm the mom who serves on the PTA board at her child's special education school.  I'm the mom who runs out to get supplies for her child's class the very day his teacher sends home a list of items needed.  I'm the mom who fights very hard for her child.  I'm the mom who will not let anyone mistreat her child & there's nothing that will stop this mom from advocating for her child with all she has in her.

I'm the mom who wears jeans, tee-shirts, flip flops or sneakers to every place she get away with it.  I'm the mom who does her own manicures & pedicures.  I'm the mom who struggles to fit in at times...more so than most may think.  I'm the mom who is overweight but calls herself a runner...well, because she is a runner...she just doesn't look like a runner.  I'm the mom who runs for her little boy because she wants him to run one day.  

I'm the mom with a not so pretty past.  I'm the mom who grew up in a loving Christian home, but went in her own direction for a few years.  I'm the mom who has been judged for getting married so young and not graduating from college.  I'm the mom who used to smoke cigarettes and swear like a sailor.  I'm the mom who loses her patience more often than most people may think.  I'm the mom who cries at the drop of a hat when it comes to her son.    I'm the mom who loves Jesus with all her heart, but goes weeks at a time without reading her bible.  I'm the mom who prays daily, just that she will get through the day.  I'm the mom, that by the end of the day, just wants to sit on the couch with her husband & watch TV rather than opening up her bible to study God's word.  

I'm the mom with two or three very close friends and bunch of acquaintances.  I'm the mom whose best friend in the world lives in another state, and even though they don't talk near enough, they are two peas in a pod, always knowing that they are there for each other no matter what.  She knows who she is.  I'm the mom who is cautious of other moms as there is so much competition out there related to children and husbands.  I'm the mom who enjoys sitting at the coffee shop with a good book, going for a long run, going shopping, and just being myself.  I'm the mom who is comforted by the Lord when her close friends understand her...without her having to explain.

I'm the mom whose husband is also a Christian & loves the Lord with all his heart.  I'm the mom who wants to spend every waking second with her family on the weekend, and the last thing she wants to do on Sunday morning is to put her child in a daycare type environment just for him to scream and cry the entire time.  I'm the mom that many have judged for not going to church, but she has made her peace with that.  I'm the mom that lives for the Lord and not for others.  I'm the mom who isn't perfect, but tries her best to do as the Lord would have her do.

I'm the mom who is just plain exhausted by the end of the day that she looks at the clock multiple times as she counts down until her child's bedtime.  I'm the mom who looks forward to that glass of wine after a long day at the hospital where she hears all about what is wrong with her child.  I'm the mom who has to take breaks from Facebook every once in a while as she feels like she will never measure up or be like other moms.  I'm the mom who, for the most part, is okay with that.  

I'm the mom who has different goals and dreams for her child.  I'm the mom who doesn't care if her child goes to college or becomes successful by society's standards.  I'm the mom who doesn't care about having grandchildren one day.  I'm the mom who doesn't long for the day when my child is out of the house & she's living the retired life with her husband.  I'm the mom who just wants to outlive her child.  I'm the mom who doesn't want to watch her child suffer and die from Cystic Fibrosis.  I'm the mom who doesn't want to bury her child.  

This is the kind of mom I am.
by on May. 31, 2013 at 8:50 PM
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Replies (1-10):
TheJerseyGirl
by on May. 31, 2013 at 9:01 PM
5 moms liked this
And you know what Darby? You are such an incredible mom.... One who is so beautiful to me just by the words I just read, yet i dont even know her eye color.The mom who made me laugh and cry with her words, yet we've never met. The mom who is so much like me and some of us here, and had me saying " I do that too!" As I read her post.

How lucky Brady is that God chose you to be his mother. I hope all your dreams and wishes for you and for him come true, my friend.

(((Hugs)))

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lucasmadre
by Kari on May. 31, 2013 at 9:02 PM
1 mom liked this

Brave...that is the kind of mom you are.  XO

TheJerseyGirl
by on May. 31, 2013 at 9:04 PM
1 mom liked this
And btw... I left my extremely long grocery list on the kitchen table while I went grocery shopping......I tell my husband, it's not just a habit, it's a lifestyle lolololol.

And flip flops!!!!!! Heaven is a place where you run barefoot in the Summer and flip flops the rest of the year
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smarieljlee
by Sara on May. 31, 2013 at 9:06 PM

<3

darbyakeep45
by Darby on May. 31, 2013 at 9:19 PM

Thank you for your awesome words!  I needed to hear that:)  You are wonderful mama!

Quoting TheJerseyGirl:

And you know what Darby? You are such an incredible mom.... One who is so beautiful to me just by the words I just read, yet i dont even know her eye color.The mom who made me laugh and cry with her words, yet we've never met. The mom who is so much like me and some of us here, and had me saying " I do that too!" As I read her post.

How lucky Brady is that God chose you to be his mother. I hope all your dreams and wishes for you and for him come true, my friend.

(((Hugs)))


MomOfOneCoolKid
by Gold Member on May. 31, 2013 at 9:36 PM

That was SO beautiful!

 

Do you mind if I share this at my next bible study, special needs support group?

darbyakeep45
by Darby on May. 31, 2013 at 9:36 PM

You're more than welcome to share it:)

Quoting MomOfOneCoolKid:

That was SO beautiful!


Do you mind if I share this at my next bible study, special needs support group?


MomOfOneCoolKid
by Gold Member on May. 31, 2013 at 9:37 PM

 


Quoting TheJerseyGirl:

And you know what Darby? You are such an incredible mom.... One who is so beautiful to me just by the words I just read, yet i dont even know her eye color.The mom who made me laugh and cry with her words, yet we've never met. The mom who is so much like me and some of us here, and had me saying " I do that too!" As I read her post.

How lucky Brady is that God chose you to be his mother. I hope all your dreams and wishes for you and for him come true, my friend.

(((Hugs)))


 +10000!

VioletsMomTown
by on May. 31, 2013 at 9:41 PM

Anyone would be lucky to have you as a mom, keep up the great work mama!

Violet's Mom



mypbandj
by Jen on May. 31, 2013 at 11:27 PM
1 mom liked this

Darby you don't need to try and measure up to other moms because you are already the perfect mom to your child and nothing else really matters. Perfect doesn't have anything to do with remembering the grocery list or making time to read the bible. Its about living for your child. You may not know it but you've got it figured out. A lot of moms are reading this wondering how they measure up to YOU! Because you are so awesome. Seriously, I think you are great. 

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