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Autism - Support Across the Spectrum Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

Hardest age for you and your child?

Posted by on Jun. 26, 2013 at 5:14 PM
  • 12 Replies

My 5.5 year old, J, is on the high-end of the spectrum. His biggest issues are in communication and social skills which can make him interesting to interact with at times, especially when he's upset. I heard from a couple of other moms with kids on the spectrum that 4-8 were their hardest years. What do you think? What age has been the most difficult for you and your child? 

My mom, who is a kindergarten teacher, assures me that many of the issues that are driving me crazy right now are similar to what typical kids would be doing at this age. I guess that makes me feel better to some extent, but it doesn't make it easier to try to figure out how to discipline a child who either doesn't understand or doesn't respond to the usual strategies. 

Have a great day!

by on Jun. 26, 2013 at 5:14 PM
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Replies (1-10):
amonkeymom
by Amy on Jun. 26, 2013 at 7:38 PM

I think for my little guy it was more like 7-10 years old that were the hardest.  Things are definitely getting easier with him now.

emarin77
by Silver Member on Jun. 26, 2013 at 7:45 PM
1 mom liked this

Before and right after diagnosis at age 3 of mild Autism was my hardest because he was so angry and he lost his ability to communicate clearly.  My son is doing very well now with communication and social behaviors and will be attending typical kindergarten in later August.  He is age 5 now.

Charizma77
by Carissa on Jun. 26, 2013 at 7:49 PM

Kindergarten and half of first grade was by far the hardest time we went through since Ashton was dx. Now, my dd who has always been really easy and isn't on the spectrum and we had more issues with her this year since she started kindergarten then before. However, it was very different then my son. 

Rosebud27aj
by Amanda on Jun. 26, 2013 at 7:55 PM

So far all of it, but my kids are only 6 and 3.

MomOfOneCoolKid
by Gold Member on Jun. 26, 2013 at 8:44 PM

My son is only 4, but the terrible 2s were oh SO terrible. Well, more like 2 1/2 to 3 1/2. Then he got adhd meds and i learned behavior strategies and he got a good school and so its been smooth sailing (for the most part, fingers crossed) since about 3 1/2. So -- only one yr so far of "good" LOL

He was a trying baby to be sure.

From what I read on these posts, puberty (8 to 14+) are tough b/c of hormones.

In general, I would think the older they get, the tougher it might be w/o the right plan.

TheLadyAmalthea
by Bronze Member on Jun. 26, 2013 at 9:12 PM

Life was very difficult when my son was 3 and 4. He is almost 6 and life isn't as difficult, but it's still hard on him and all of us. We are finally going to be starting some ABA this summer, so I'm hoping with some therapy for him, and therapy and education for us, quality of life will improve for us all.

TheJerseyGirl
by Michele on Jun. 26, 2013 at 9:55 PM
That's a good question... There hasn't been a real hard age... They all seem the same just a bit different.
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blessedhappymom
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 12:14 AM
21/2 to 3 was a rough time for us. Once he turned 4 he hit a major burst and was able to communicate a lot more. We have lil things pop up every now and then, but not like it was back then.
darbyakeep45
by Darby on Jun. 27, 2013 at 6:16 AM

Well, this has been a tough age for Brady...he's almost 5 but has the development of an 18-24 month old, so the typical "twos" are kind of hard for him:)  Hugs!

Bobcatridge
by Carol on Jun. 28, 2013 at 5:07 PM

Age 6 to 7 was really difficult.  My daughter had severe meltdowns at school - she would start screaming and wouldn't stop.  As she got older the meltdowns at school completely stopped.  Instead she would meltdown at home.  At age 11, the bullying at school became worse and she wanted friends so bad but her social skills were not good. We increased social skills therapy and I complained to the school about the bullying.  They brought in an inspirational anti-bullying speaker.  In addition they had lunch meetings with the class to talk about bullying.  My daughter is now 12 and she still has problems with bullying but she has actually managed make a few friends.  In summary, I would have to say 1st grade and 6th grade have been the most difficult so far.

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