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Do you ever get a little depressed?

Posted by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 10:29 PM
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I am normally a very positive, optimistic person. I love my son and there is nothing I'd change about him. He's 4 years old, he's always happy and smiley and sometimes goofy and sometimes bold. but his personality is full of love and happiness. 

Once in a while, mainly around certain times of the year, I get down, Like he doesn't understand holidays, He has no clue what Christmas is, or santa like many children have that childhook belief of santa, or the easter bunny, and he really has no idea about it. I can take him to a Birthday party and he doesn't understand whats going on and he definitley doesn't like being around a lot of kids which is understandable. It's hard to communicate with him because he is very low with verbal. 

I don't normally get depressed, but just lately I have been. He is so special to me and so smart. What really gets me, he has no clue what goes on day to day, like Holidays, or anything. he understands a few things when i do talk with him. He says between 1-3 words at a time.  But what gets me is he is so smart. He's 4 yrs old, he learned how to use a computer, he plays those zacbrowser games or he likes to watch animations on youtube. I help him with youtube, but a lot of things he he knows how to go on my computer, go on my facebook (bookmarked) and log on my cafeland game lol. 

I am so proud of him for his accomplishments, I am so greatful and blessed that he's happy and healthy. Sometimes though I will be honest, I wonder what it would be like to be able to talk to him and hold a small conversation, Like asking how his day was at school or what he learned.   

Has anyone ever felt this way? 

by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 10:29 PM
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by Kari on Jul. 16, 2013 at 10:42 PM
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Yes, of course, all the time! It is natural to want things the way you thought they would be and to feel sad that they aren't. Being honest about your feelings will help you move forward and be the best mom you can be. Every once in a while I have a real good cry about my son even though I am crazy about him. This is hard for both of us. He struggles, I struggle. I wonder- what would it be like to have a child that was easy to communicate with? What would it be like for him to be able to communicate easily. I swear I would sacrifice so much to give him that ability. I hate it when things are hard for him but I also have great hope for his future and I believe in him.

Hang in there, you are not alone. Never alone!  XO

by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 11:07 PM

I get depressed when things I want to share with them as kids just doesn't work I want them to like reading and you would think I was torturing my 10 year olds, I want to share or watch movies with them and that doesn't always work because they go into their little world where I can't go and I think that is the hardest part not being allowed into their magical world.

I try to understand them, but there is like a brick wall that is in our way named Autism I'm not one of those parents who act like their kid died when they got diagnosed but my kids don't get how I go out of my way to do things or get them little things to make it better for them.  They don't understand why people treat them differently or look at them like they have this contagious disease.  It's hard cause we want the best but can't always protect them from the world.

I think depression is expected as we deal with more we didn't think we would have too.  We as parents think that our kids will get holidays and special occassions and sometimes it doesn't have the same affect depending on what their mood is that day.

by Darby on Jul. 17, 2013 at 5:38 AM

To be honest, I get more anxious than's a struggle daily.  Hugs mama!

by Amy on Jul. 17, 2013 at 1:00 PM

Well, of course.  It's easy to get depressed when you think about all of the things he can't do, but I think you're on the right track remembering how smart he is and all of the things he can/does do.

by on Jul. 17, 2013 at 1:42 PM

It's a natural response and perfectly normal.  But if your blues last for a long time or make you too tired to deal with your ordinary life, it's a good idea to seek help.  

by Platinum Member on Jul. 17, 2013 at 2:14 PM

My son sounds like yours in many ways.  And while I don't discount your feelings of depression and support you in them, I do not get depressed myself.  I guess life is just so busy and there is so much overload that I try to just enjoy the good and what my son can do than get dragged down by something he can't.  There is a lot in life he will probably show me that a typical child would not, so I try to see what I will gain instead of what I might miss.

That being said, I can certainly understand why you could feel that way and hope tomorrow is a better day!

by on Jul. 17, 2013 at 3:48 PM


by on Jul. 17, 2013 at 4:18 PM
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I think that what your experiencing here is completely normal. You're experiencing a loss in a sense. It's the loss of what you thought and hoped your relationship with your son would be like at this age, so it's completely natural to feel a bit of grief. 

I think that you're dealing with it in a healthy way too. You're not bottling it up inside, but instead you're sharing the way you feel with people who can really empathize, understand (at least to some extent) and support you. 

*hugs* You're not alone =) 

by Emma on Jul. 17, 2013 at 4:58 PM
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As someone who doesn't talk very much because I'm an adult with classic autism - he understands MORE than you think. Just because he doesn't talk about it, he does understand more about his surroundings that he can probably communicate. It's okay to feel confused and sad about some of this. Just know that he has a very good chance to grow, and develop and have a good life, despite his not talking a ton right now.
by on Jul. 17, 2013 at 4:59 PM

I could have written this........I still cry, my son was diagnosed age 4 and he's 8 now.  Things that are easy for other kids are hard for him, but I know the older he gets the better it will be.  Plus I think about the non verbal kids out there and try to be satisfied with our level of communication and function knowing someone else would give anything to hear their kid say I love you, and that always puts things in perspective.  You are completely normal for feeling that way.......sending hugs!!

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