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Autism - Support Across the Spectrum Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

Any advice?

Posted by on Sep. 13, 2013 at 11:16 AM
  • 10 Replies

 My kidos have both started school going on 2 weeks now and I'm concerned by my oldest son will not use the bathroom. He teacher told me yesterday when I picked him up that he has yet to use the bathroom since school has started! I reminded her again that he has to be told to go, he will never and has never gon on his own.  I feel like one day he's jst going to burst and everyone will make fun of him.. making the issue of him using the bathroom even worse. I've tried taking him into the school bathroom so he can see that it's ok but he jst started covering his ears, closed his eye and screaming and saying it's too big and so scary.. it's only about 4 ft bigger than our bathroom at home. And the toilets are short, jst for children. It was like he was going to have a heart attack. I'm jst so worried bc holding your pee is never good and Im jst worried... thats a long day not to go to the bathroom. And he also jst learned to use the bathroom... i wanna say bout 10 mos ago. He doesnt eat the teacher said but she said he drinks a lot drinks.. which she said the amount that even wouldnt be able to hold it. Any advice?  

by on Sep. 13, 2013 at 11:16 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Momof4AEMW
by Gold Member on Sep. 13, 2013 at 11:42 AM

I have had this problem with my NT 10 year old.  He's now in 5th and will finally pee if he really needs to, but he pretty much runs home and poops as he just will not do it there.  They do not have doors on the stalls, I am not sure I would either. lol!  

Is there any way the teacher could let your son go on his own at an off time, like not when the bathroom is so full of noisy boys, flushing toilets, running water for washing hands.  But when it is more likely to be just him.  Like instead of going with a flood of kids after lunch time, could an aide walk him to go right on the way to lunch or something when the others are heading to the cafeteria?  Then he could meet up with his class and eat?  Or if the class goes right after recess before returning to class, maybe he could be taken on the way out to recess instead.  This way the other kids probably would not even notice to single your son out, but the bathroom may be more quieter for him to get use to?  If it is really a sensory bathroom issue with the size, lights, noise, everything, maybe they need to let him go to the teacher area which is more private and quieter.  He'd be the only one there.  If he has an IEP, I'm sure you can get something accommodated in it to help.  Good luck.

Blueluvr
by on Sep. 13, 2013 at 11:57 AM

 He wont even pee! :-(   I would be happy if he at least did what your son does.  But, neither of my children have IEPs. The principal swears that the "power assistants" will help my boys with any issues. It's a very small school and they have regular classes and jst a few special ed classes for the children with severe disabilities. During his eval before they even finished she told me "He clearly does jst fine."  While my son is over there giving great detail about all kinds of sharks and they're askin him about suzy and her breakfast before school. WTH?! Lol... BUT... The bathroom i took him to was actually the teachers bathroom. I was told I cant go to the childrens bathroom which, is understandable. But it jst didnt work. I'm seriously thinking of getting some ear muffs for him? And I will definitely mention going to the bathroom alone or before or after other. I know she takes boys then the girls and I never thought of how rowdy it might be if they're all in there. Boys will be boys! Lol.. Thanks so much for the advice!

Quoting Momof4AEMW:

I have had this problem with my NT 10 year old.  He's now in 5th and will finally pee if he really needs to, but he pretty much runs home and poops as he just will not do it there.  They do not have doors on the stalls, I am not sure I would either. lol!  

Is there any way the teacher could let your son go on his own at an off time, like not when the bathroom is so full of noisy boys, flushing toilets, running water for washing hands.  But when it is more likely to be just him.  Like instead of going with a flood of kids after lunch time, could an aide walk him to go right on the way to lunch or something when the others are heading to the cafeteria?  Then he could meet up with his class and eat?  Or if the class goes right after recess before returning to class, maybe he could be taken on the way out to recess instead.  This way the other kids probably would not even notice to single your son out, but the bathroom may be more quieter for him to get use to?  If it is really a sensory bathroom issue with the size, lights, noise, everything, maybe they need to let him go to the teacher area which is more private and quieter.  He'd be the only one there.  If he has an IEP, I'm sure you can get something accommodated in it to help.  Good luck.

 

wildchild.com
by Janine on Sep. 13, 2013 at 1:29 PM
My son had the same problem & the teachers started taking him to their bathroom. They would have to stand behind him & make sure he actually peed. In his new school they have a bathroom right in the classroom.
puertoricangeek
by on Sep. 13, 2013 at 1:40 PM

iI definitely agree, they need to have him use the teachers bathroom. The issue could be anything from echo, amount of sinks, toilets, urinals. I would talk to them ans ask. I couldn't hurt.

Jodee24
by Member on Sep. 13, 2013 at 9:05 PM
My ot actually said they worked with a boy where each day they would take a walk to the bathroom (getting closer every few days) and while they did that they had someone flushing the toilets the entire time. After about 2 weeks he finally made it to the bathroom and was use to the flushing noises. (They are much louder in public places). Good luck! These amazing kids love to make us think a lot harder. Lol
Blueluvr
by on Sep. 13, 2013 at 11:03 PM

 There IS actually a bathroom that is in the room for emergencies but it's a shared bathroom with a spec. ed class nxt door and she says she doesnt want to take him in there bc  if he's scared of the bathroom alone, she said you can hear the kids screaming next door. So i'm not too sure if that would help or not. I threw out the idea that if he peed THEN left the bathroom and she could flush it? She said she doesnt want to upset him bc he had a meltdown the day she tried to be firm and tell him to go potty. (I told her to push a little.. i know children get away with stuff with teachers.) I've definitely thought of getting him those sound blocking ear phones.. or maybe i'm making those up?! Lol... I know I see ppl who work at the airport wear them. Hehee

Quoting wildchild.com:

My son had the same problem & the teachers started taking him to their bathroom. They would have to stand behind him & make sure he actually peed. In his new school they have a bathroom right in the classroom.

 

Blueluvr
by on Sep. 13, 2013 at 11:06 PM

 You've got that right. Bathrooms have the SUPER suction going on Lol.. SO much louder than at home. But when I was with him in the bathroom I could also hear other toilets flushing that we're in the bathroom?? Maybe on the other side of the wall.. not too sure. But I hope it gets better for him. Bc its definitely hard... today when he came home from school.. it was the first time EVER i didnt have to tell him to go to the bathroom.. he ran str8 into the house and to the bathroom.. *fingerscrossed

Quoting Jodee24:

My ot actually said they worked with a boy where each day they would take a walk to the bathroom (getting closer every few days) and while they did that they had someone flushing the toilets the entire time. After about 2 weeks he finally made it to the bathroom and was use to the flushing noises. (They are much louder in public places). Good luck! These amazing kids love to make us think a lot harder. Lol

 

wildchild.com
by Janine on Sep. 14, 2013 at 6:40 AM
Quoting Blueluvr:

 There IS actually a bathroom that is in the room for emergencies but it's a shared bathroom with a spec. ed class nxt door and she says she doesnt want to take him in there bc  if he's scared of the bathroom alone, she said you can hear the kids screaming next door. So i'm not too sure if that would help or not. I threw out the idea that if he peed THEN left the bathroom and she could flush it? She said she doesnt want to upset him bc he had a meltdown the day she tried to be firm and tell him to go potty. (I told her to push a little.. i know children get away with stuff with teachers.) I've definitely thought of getting him those sound blocking ear phones.. or maybe i'm making those up?! Lol... I know I see ppl who work at the airport wear them. Hehee


Quoting wildchild.com:My son had the same problem & the teachers started taking him to their bathroom. They would have to stand behind him & make sure he actually peed. In his new school they have a bathroom right in the classroom.


 


Ear plugs might help....my son to this day hates the blow dryers.
wildchild.com
by Janine on Sep. 14, 2013 at 6:43 AM
Quoting Blueluvr:

 There IS actually a bathroom that is in the room for emergencies but it's a shared bathroom with a spec. ed class nxt door and she says she doesnt want to take him in there bc  if he's scared of the bathroom alone, she said you can hear the kids screaming next door. So i'm not too sure if that would help or not. I threw out the idea that if he peed THEN left the bathroom and she could flush it? She said she doesnt want to upset him bc he had a meltdown the day she tried to be firm and tell him to go potty. (I told her to push a little.. i know children get away with stuff with teachers.) I've definitely thought of getting him those sound blocking ear phones.. or maybe i'm making those up?! Lol... I know I see ppl who work at the airport wear them. Hehee


Quoting wildchild.com:My son had the same problem & the teachers started taking him to their bathroom. They would have to stand behind him & make sure he actually peed. In his new school they have a bathroom right in the classroom.


 


Ear plugs might help....my son to this day hates the blow dryers.
darbyakeep45
by Darby on Sep. 14, 2013 at 7:14 AM

Hugs mama!  Glad these ladies could help out:)  I honestly don't have any advice as we aren't there yet!

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