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Autism - Support Across the Spectrum Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

thinking if having another baby after autism

Posted by on Oct. 14, 2013 at 2:15 PM
  • 24 Replies
Hi mom Im a stay at home mother of 2 children My daughter is 11 and son is 8 with non verbal autism .My husband wants a third child and i do as well but the questions stands out more now that Im 37 should I have another child.
My son is so sweet and daughter wants someone to play with and although he can sometimes be challenging.Im scared not to have another and Im scared to have it.Has anyone out there gone through this.My husband says he will support me any way but Idk
by on Oct. 14, 2013 at 2:15 PM
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Replies (1-10):
wildchild.com
by Janine on Oct. 14, 2013 at 2:26 PM
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If I was younger (I'm 44) & had a good husband I would consider it.I had my son at 36 & had no problems. But it's ultimately up to you mama.
TheLadyAmalthea
by Bronze Member on Oct. 14, 2013 at 2:38 PM
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I have two children, a son and a daughter ages 6 and 4. My son has autism, and my daughter does not. Every time you decide to have a baby there is always a chance of anything happening, from birth defects to autism. It's just one of those things. I am personally done having children, I just couldn't handle another one, special needs or not.  If you are both wanting another child, do it sooner rather than later. At 37, you are still young enough to do it. The older you get, the harder it will be. Just go into it knowing you are at risk, just like any other person in the world, of having a child that may have some sort of problem.  Or if you both want another child, but don't want to go through all of it, you can always look into adoption. You don't even have to adopt a baby, you could adopt an older child, that way you will know if there are any health issues with the child.

EthansMomma2010
by on Oct. 14, 2013 at 3:07 PM
I personally wouldnt. My mom had me at 39 and to be honest it was not a fun experience. But that could be because of my mom not the age. Lol. As for the autism...figure out if you can handle having another autistic child. It took us a long time but we have determined that we can handle it and are trying again.
Jenn8604
by Jennifer on Oct. 14, 2013 at 3:09 PM
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Id love another child. In fact I want 3 more. But unless I find a dh I'm stuck w one.
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Jenn8604
by Jennifer on Oct. 14, 2013 at 3:11 PM
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Btw I saw an article the other day with a 47 yr old having her first baby, so you're not too old to be having #3.
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JTMOM422
by Brenda on Oct. 14, 2013 at 3:18 PM
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My ds is 3 and my dd is 5. I was 35 and 37 when they were born. I waited to have children late in life. I didn't want anymore than 2 so I would not have ever considered having another one. I am not sure if the dx would have made a difference or not. My husband has another child so 3 in a family was more than enough for me. Unfortunately the only ones who can decide this is you and your husband. Good luck in your decision momma and welcome to the group

.Bad.Wolf.
by Megan on Oct. 14, 2013 at 3:31 PM

I have have 4 kids.

My first is "normal", my second is high-functioning, my third is non-verbal low functioning and my fourth is "normal".

You can never tell if another child will have it. I was nervous when I was pregnant with my 4th, simply because the severity seemed to get worse with each pregnancy. She is a normal 2 year old & shows no signs of having Autism.

Honestly, just hope for the best & love your kids however they are. :)

jessica.v102
by on Oct. 14, 2013 at 4:36 PM
Thank you I finally don't feel alone and is good to know other mommies opinion I have no family only a sister in law who lives in nj and Im in ny .But thank you
lady_katie
by Silver Member on Oct. 14, 2013 at 4:37 PM
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I'm going through the same thing. We're scheduling genetic testing at the moment, so the results of the DNA test will help us to make our decision. My son is moderate, and I can hardly handle his challenging behavior. I've learned from experience that I simply CANNOT depend on the "system" or churches or family or friends to help, so logic tells me that unless there is a really good chance of having a child who is less challenging than my son, we probably shouldn't even consider it. Maybe...MAYBE in a few years, if we can pay out of pocket for help, we can revisit the idea. It's heart breaking to me, but we all have our limits of what we can handle on our own. 

jessica.v102
by on Oct. 14, 2013 at 4:40 PM
I know my son is a times complicated but I finally have a respite worker now thank god and 3 times a week she helps me and my chris loves her.
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