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Autism - Support Across the Spectrum Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

How to deal with Christmas morning let down?

Posted by on Dec. 6, 2013 at 9:24 AM
  • 9 Replies
A little background... David is 5 and in kindergarten and was diagnosed 6 months ago with autism. Dh and I also have an 11 yr old. (He will turn 12 2 days after Christmas) When school started in September I was able to go from working 2 days a week to 5 days a week and we were finally able to start catching up financially.

A month ago, I injured myself and I've spent the last 4 weeks out of work and on crutches. I may be out for another 6-12 weeks and surgery is a possibility.

In short, our Christmas budget is beyond tight. Our 11 yr old understands and has been crossing things off his Christmas/Birthday wish list. All that's left is a laptop that he knows is a pipe dream and a new pair of sneakers. My little one doesn't understand finances and 100% believes in the magic of Santa. I was able to buy one modest gift for each child and am hoping to buy a few smaller things before the big day.

BUT... My little one came home from school this week and told us that Santa is bringing him an iPad for Christmas. After lots of questions and conversations, I think I figured out what happened. They use the iPad a lot at school in speech and in OT. I believe he asked to take it home and was told that he couldn't, but that if he asks Santa he may get one for Christmas. My little boy is insisting that Santa will deliver an iPad on Christmas morning. And I am heartbroken over the fact that it just will not be able to happen. It's caused quite a ruckus in our house already. His big brother told me this morning that he doesn't really need anything for Christmas, and we should not buy him anything in order to be able to afford to buy the iPad for his brother. Thing is, even if no one else got gifts, that iPad is still so out of reach.

How do I make him understand? How do I make Christmas morning fun and magical and exciting even without an iPad under the tree? How do I prepare him now? I've explained that Santa doesn't make iPads and that they are really only for bigger kids and grown ups and that Santa will bring the gift that he thinks David will like best. And he always replies with " Santa is going to bring me an iPad for Christmas"
by on Dec. 6, 2013 at 9:24 AM
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Replies (1-9):
AspieAuntie
by Risa on Dec. 6, 2013 at 2:39 PM
3 moms liked this

Would he respond to a phone call from Santa himself? Maybe you could get a male friend to call and pretend to be Santa and explain that he heard your son's wish for an iPad but that, like you said, Santa doesn't make iPads. He used to, but the reindeer kept eating the apples that went on the backs and the elves spent all their time playing Candy Crush instead of making toys. It was a disaster. But Santa will bring him something special that he's sure David will enjoy. If you don't have a friend to make the call you could always write it in a letter. Just an idea. :) Good luck!

lady_katie
by Silver Member on Dec. 6, 2013 at 2:49 PM
1 mom liked this

I think that whoever put that idea in his head should have to pay for it! I would be furious if this happened to our family!!! 

Quoting 3guys4me: I believe he asked to take it home and was told that he couldn't, but that if he asks Santa he may get one for Christmas."


Nickmom1118
by Nicole on Dec. 6, 2013 at 3:07 PM
I would also be very upset if someone gave him that idea of Santa brining him an iPad.

I like the idea of Santa writing him a letter or calling him and explaining it to him. Good luck mom.

And he has such a sweet older brother to offer to give up his Christmas gift so that he is happy on Christmas morning!
SamMom912
by Gold Member on Dec. 6, 2013 at 3:49 PM

An ipad moni? Only 250? Or a refurbished one? i dont know what your christmas budget is... But, i know, thats not what your asking... 

I think aspieauntie has a great idea,,, that santa just cant.. And it has nothing to do with how good or bad he is.. Or maybe more lyou can explain that santa brings a few gifts and moms and dads give a few gifts and an ipad is very expensive.. Bt maybe for his birthday? Or maybe in a few months when you guys have a little more money he can get one. 

I wish I had freeflowing money, id send you one, sorry, 

Lynette
by on Dec. 6, 2013 at 3:54 PM
1 mom liked this
I have given my kids Santa's materials budget. Told them Santa only has 100 per kid to work with. They know if they ask for something over that it won't come.

I don't know if that would work for your son to give a set number or not but I thought I would share just in case.
3guys4me
by Member on Dec. 6, 2013 at 4:07 PM
Unfortunately, even the iPad mini is out of reach for us right now.

This is really only the second Christmas that he has really understood the idea of Santa Clause and last year Santa was able to bring everything on his list, which was a bike and a white board with markers. His experience is that Santa brings what he asks for. He doesn't understand the concept of a budget and I highly doubt he will in the few weeks we have left.

I am insanely angry with the person that put this idea in his head, but there's nothing I can do about it now.

The letter from Santa is a good idea. He may be able to process the idea if it comes from the big man himself. Thanks guys.
-BeautifulRose-
by on Dec. 6, 2013 at 4:11 PM
Have you applied for any grants yet? I know they won't come in time, but maybe you can tell him Santa wanted to bring him one but couldn't get it in time for Christmas. He will bring it later. Then you can apply for an iPad grant like the one linked below or perhaps go through insurance. I have no idea how well that works, but I've heard of people getting it covered through insurance as a communication device. You could also try to find local organizations that can help.

http://www.autismcares.org/site/c.mqLOIYOBKlF/b.4844551/k.9606/Technology_Grant.htm

I know for most kids an iPad is just an electronic device, but to kids with autism, it can be a great learning tool. I'm sorry your having a tough time financially. I understand it's a bad time for "Santa" to being an iPad, but I hope you can find another funding source. Whoever put that in your son's head that he could ask Santa for an iPad really should've thought about what they were saying!

Good luck!
patnic
by Bronze Member on Dec. 6, 2013 at 5:35 PM

I wish I would have started this tradition, but I think I'm a little too late.  Santa brings 1 present and everything else comes from mom and dad.  Do you think it is too late to tell your son that? 

TheJerseyGirl
by Michele on Dec. 7, 2013 at 6:23 AM

 Hugs momma  =)

It's so funny you said an IPad becaise my son is asking for the same! But he asked for this after he'd asked for other things that I've gotten. When I told him that was a big order for Santa to fill, he said "But it's all that I want."

Kids...sigh.

I know adults mean well, but who would tell him that he could get one for Christmas? I could understand if they were $10, but we all know how expensive IPads are! I think at 5 you could start with the idea that Santa brings each child a gift, 3 gifts, whatever number you want to use, and that it would be impossible for Santa to bring each child an IPAd that asked for one. That an IPad is something a family saves for.

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