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Autism - Support Across the Spectrum Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

Hard Christmas w my son.

Posted by on Dec. 25, 2013 at 4:58 PM
  • 16 Replies
This Xmas has been so hard, my family can't except my sons changes, all they have done is screamed for him for every things he's done . For him to sit and wait. He is very sensory seeking and also has ADHD.
I feel like going in the closest and crying. They keep saying I'm bad parents and need to be a lot harder in him. That he deserves no gifts bc he's bad and care listen.

Really hope everyone's else's Xmas went much better and enjoyable and have excepting faimliies.
by on Dec. 25, 2013 at 4:58 PM
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Replies (1-10):
solen
by VintageMom on Dec. 25, 2013 at 5:15 PM

(((HUGS))))

families suck sometimes!!!  Christmas is so hard on kiddos on the spectrum, the excitement is sometimes major overload for them.  Just give your son a big hug, maybe he wants to hid in the closet with you!

SamMom912
by Gold Member on Dec. 25, 2013 at 9:01 PM

Oooh, i am so sorry. You are NOT a bad mom! This has NOTHING to do with you! Your sons DISABILITY is not a reflection of BAD parenting! NO one would think you were a horrible parent if he had one arm or some other "physical" disability.. But with these "invisable" disability Its MUCH harder. 

Sweetie, stand your ground. Print out INFORMATIONAL packets for your family and mail them. Next time a holiday rolls around EDUCATE them. If you need me to, ILL make the packet, you hand them out... ;) its sad that oeople just ONT know better.. And I am SO sorry they made you feel badly. You dont deserve that... And on Christmas... Cme on... 

Today was hard on me too.. So I hear you... My son Sam had a rough time, couldnt sit at the Dinner table (smelly food!) wanted to be by himself in an empty bedroom upstairs for the whole day... (Not our house) only came down when people had gifts for him, and shortly after that, he left, upset... (He is 7, and someone got him a book made for 1-3rd graders,, and it looked like a babyish book to him cause he is an advanced reader, so he was bored and insulted at the book.. When these people meant well... )  Even when 2 of his cousins tried to come in..... They could play for 15 minutes before Sam would get upset, ask them to leave.. Or theyd come tell me that he was mean, or rude... And Sam doesnt always chose the greatest tone, and hey, when we are stressed, we arent ad polite and nice as we should be... 

It was hard for me, cause his cousins were the highlight of the table, everything thinking they are so cute, so funny, and MY kid cant even be in the room... And MY kid is all that too.. But no one but me and hubby (and occassionaly his teachers) get to see that... 

wildchild.com
by Janine on Dec. 25, 2013 at 9:01 PM
I'm so sorry mama (((hugs)))
samomama
by Sally on Dec. 25, 2013 at 10:03 PM

(((HUGS)))

Lisamg
by Member on Dec. 25, 2013 at 10:25 PM

 I'm so sorry it has been so hard. My son is 15 and much calmer now. Also the family has had many years to get used to him. there have been many a day when i just want to stay away from everyone. I hope it gets better.

tictacmama
by Arlea on Dec. 25, 2013 at 10:31 PM

 Aww, I'm sorry to hear that. Just breathe hon. You're doing a good job, remember they aren't there day in and day out dealing with the meltdowns. Tomorrow's a new day. I hope it's a better one. Hugs :)

MissTacoBell
by Bronze Member on Dec. 25, 2013 at 10:43 PM
Breathe. I remember that time in the journey and just keep your head up and let their words pass in one ear and out the other. Keep your attention on your ds and pay them no mind.

If they are being tough on him and you, cut them out for a bit if its feasible. That's how our Christmas was today. I had to make a tough decision to cut out of Christmas early. It was too overwhelming for him and he was acting out. And with extra family around who aren't used to him it was too annoying explaining things when I wanted to enjoy Christmas.
JTMOM422
by Brenda on Dec. 25, 2013 at 11:10 PM

I am sorry that your family is acting this way. It's not a time for being judgemental but being greatful. I think it's easier to blame the parents than it is to accept a dx. They don't live with your son and don't know what his days are typically. I hope your holidays get better momma. HUGS

HippoCat
by Hadley on Dec. 25, 2013 at 11:25 PM

I am so sorry. That sounds awful! Of course he deserves presents, of course you are a good parent. Maybe they should be questioning themselves instead. I hope you will have some relief now that the holiday is over.

mypbandj
by Jen on Dec. 26, 2013 at 1:55 AM
I'm so sorry.
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