Need advise and honest opinions:
Due to a hubby's job transfer our family had to move from Gilbert, Arizona to Montgomery County Pennsylvania this past summer. It was a Hugh move and has been very difficult. We left our whole life. Our home we had built from the ground up when the kids were very little, our community, family and friends.
We have 3 children and it is my middle child who is on the spectrum. Non-verbal learning disability. Speech and language learning disability, some developmental delay and social communication anxiety. He has been a difficult child to figure out and did not get a diagnosis until he was 9 years old. He is now 20 years old which brings me to my question.
So with the advise and recommendation of the iep team in Arizona we had David graduate . We made plans to do this when we found out we were going to move. We did this for all different reasons and I cannot go into all that stuff right now. The point is neither him nor I was ready for transition to the adult world. I wasn't thinking that if I took him out of school all my services and resources would stop. And here we are in a state so different from Arizona. After spending days, weeks and countless hours on the phone with all the state agency offices and researching websites for resources the outcome is very negative. The state of Pennsylvania has a waiver that you have to qualify for which our son has qualified for but get this: A waiting list of 4000 to 6000 people. I was told today we could be looking at one year, maybe two years before an opening and that is not a guarantee. So basically no services until an opening comes up.
My question is our family is considering going back to Arizona in the summer. This means that my husband would stay here and commute, maybe once a month to see us. We haven't slept in months with worry and concern for our son. He has basically had a lot of tv time and use of the commuter. Regression is obvious as he now will barely say one word when out in public. This is not a state we see our son being ale to live in; bus system and driving would be really hard to learn or navigate. Resources limited. The move was also very traumatic for me so I haven't had the energy or motivation to start this process all over. It's as if we just got a diagnosis. In other words I've been struggling with depression as the reality of our situation became more obvious.
We are looking for some advise. Has anyone been in this type of situation; moved to another state and then had to seperate family in order to provide for quality of life for their child? We were so connected to everything in Arizona. Our son was involved in the adult vocational rehab of the southwest autism research center. We had all of our services as we had been in the system since age 3.
Phelps and advise is what I need. I have had no one here.
Sorry for this being so long.