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Autism - Support Across the Spectrum Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

Need help!

Posted by on Jan. 21, 2014 at 10:09 PM
  • 11 Replies
Nicolas has been starting to hit and grab your head. I have constantly telling him to use his words. It's not working. He will get upset, say,"I'm mad!" And then punch. Mainly me. Saying use words isn't working because he is using his words too.

Then if he wants something, and he doesn't get our attention right away he will grab my head and very forcefully grab it and face whatever he wants. He is getting older and stronger. I think he pulled something in my neck because of doing that. I try to respond to him as soon as possible but sometimes he doesn't verbalized his needs. Then if I don't understand what he wants he keeps trying to move my head or hits me saying he is mad.

I know this is mainly a communication thing, but I really don't know what else to do. Nicolas has plenty if words but I'm not really sure why he isn't using them. His sentences are getting better but he seems like it is limiting him communicating. I think he is still trying to figure out how to use it to get what he needs. I'm not sure if that even makes sense.
by on Jan. 21, 2014 at 10:09 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Charizma77
by Carissa on Jan. 21, 2014 at 10:55 PM

Have you talked with any of his therapists or teachers about this? Ashton has a large vocabulary and can talk but can't always communicate with us and especially when he was younger he would act out of frustration. Possible that is what's happening but could be many other things as well..so hard to really know. Big hugs!

mypbandj
by Jen on Jan. 21, 2014 at 11:26 PM
1 mom liked this
I would redirect him to do something else, like tapping my leg. Or holding my hand. Anything else that would help meet his need to get your attention but in a way that won't hurt you.

You can show him how to do it before he wants something. Show him how to tap or touch your leg (or arm or whatever you decide). Then practice. A lot.

And when he starts to want your attention for real, direct him to use his new sign and then respond immediately.

I think he'd have to get a lot of positive reinforcement at first to get it so be sure to be extra responsive while teaching him.

Good luck!
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TheJerseyGirl
by Michele on Jan. 22, 2014 at 7:32 AM

 I was going to say this too. Maybe tell him to grab your hand or fold his arms together to let you know he is mad? Then redirect him to a snack, a book, tv, etc...

Quoting mypbandj: I would redirect him to do something else, like tapping my leg. Or holding my hand. Anything else that would help meet his need to get your attention but in a way that won't hurt you.

You can show him how to do it before he wants something. Show him how to tap or touch your leg (or arm or whatever you decide). Then practice. A lot.

And when he starts to want your attention for real, direct him to use his new sign and then respond immediately.

I think he'd have to get a lot of positive reinforcement at first to get it so be sure to be extra responsive while teaching him.

Good luck!

 

Nickmom1118
by Nicole on Jan. 22, 2014 at 8:11 AM
Thx. I will start working on him tapping my leg if he needs my direct attention.

Quoting mypbandj: I would redirect him to do something else, like tapping my leg. Or holding my hand. Anything else that would help meet his need to get your attention but in a way that won't hurt you.



You can show him how to do it before he wants something. Show him how to tap or touch your leg (or arm or whatever you decide). Then practice. A lot.



And when he starts to want your attention for real, direct him to use his new sign and then respond immediately.



I think he'd have to get a lot of positive reinforcement at first to get it so be sure to be extra responsive while teaching him.



Good luck!
Nickmom1118
by Nicole on Jan. 22, 2014 at 8:15 AM
He already fold his arms. But I will try telling him that when he folds his arms, then that tells me he is mad. We will see. I have feeling that I will be dealing with a lot of this today. We got 12 inches of snow and it's too cold to play in it. He's not going to be happy. :(

Quoting TheJerseyGirl:

 I was going to say this too. Maybe tell him to grab your hand or fold his arms together to let you know he is mad? Then redirect him to a snack, a book, tv, etc...


Quoting mypbandj: I would redirect him to do something else, like tapping my leg. Or holding my hand. Anything else that would help meet his need to get your attention but in a way that won't hurt you.

You can show him how to do it before he wants something. Show him how to tap or touch your leg (or arm or whatever you decide). Then practice. A lot.

And when he starts to want your attention for real, direct him to use his new sign and then respond immediately.

I think he'd have to get a lot of positive reinforcement at first to get it so be sure to be extra responsive while teaching him.

Good luck!

 

darbyakeep45
by Darby on Jan. 22, 2014 at 8:17 AM

I agree with these ladies...I'd also ask my son's ABA therapist if I were in your shoes...you guys aren't in ABA though are you?  I can't remember!

Nickmom1118
by Nicole on Jan. 22, 2014 at 9:29 AM
No. We aren't in ABA. I was actually looking into it and my insurance doesn't cover it. I think I'm going to look further into different ways I can get help with this.

Quoting darbyakeep45:

I agree with these ladies...I'd also ask my son's ABA therapist if I were in your shoes...you guys aren't in ABA though are you?  I can't remember!

princess_1983
by Bronze Member on Jan. 22, 2014 at 9:30 AM
1 mom liked this

Get him a punching bag or tell him to punch a pillow instead of hitting you.

darbyakeep45
by Darby on Jan. 22, 2014 at 10:08 AM

My son's OT is wonderful and has lots of experience with behavioral issues.  What about Nick's OT?

Quoting Nickmom1118: No. We aren't in ABA. I was actually looking into it and my insurance doesn't cover it. I think I'm going to look further into different ways I can get help with this.

Quoting darbyakeep45:

I agree with these ladies...I'd also ask my son's ABA therapist if I were in your shoes...you guys aren't in ABA though are you?  I can't remember!


Nickmom1118
by Nicole on Jan. 22, 2014 at 11:56 AM
I didn't think about this, but I will try it. Thx. I'm willing to try anything. :)

Quoting princess_1983:

Get him a punching bag or tell him to punch a pillow instead of hitting you.

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