Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Autism - Support Across the Spectrum Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

Autism and possible nasty divorce PLEASE HELP WITH ADVICE

Posted by on Jun. 26, 2014 at 11:19 AM
  • 17 Replies
1 mom liked this

Have any of you gone through a divorce?

I am probably going to pursue that but I am so worried about my kiddos.

It is a nasty one. Many ups and downs. Especially downs.

Husband does not believe the twins are autistic even the DS we have known about almost since 3 months of age.

With out writing a huge novel. Any of you gone through a nasty or abusive relationship.

Thank you so much!!

by on Jun. 26, 2014 at 11:19 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Nickmom1118
by Nicole on Jun. 26, 2014 at 2:02 PM
1 mom liked this
I haven't but here is a bump for you.

Hugs!
Momof4AEMW
by Gold Member on Jun. 26, 2014 at 2:09 PM

I have not, and am so sorry you are facing this.  You're right in that it will be hard on the kids as ASD kids have such a hard time with change, but living with a patent who does not support and believe in them I think is not any better.  Do what you feel is best for you and your kids.  It will be a rough road for you either way, so pick the one that keeps you all safe and happy!!  Hugs and good luck!

lisa12121
by Member on Jun. 26, 2014 at 2:13 PM

We haven't divorced, but have really had ups and downs in our marriage and with the diagnosis and treatment. Hang in there. You have to remember that a home with less turmoil will override the change in routine that your son will experience. Best of luck in your decision. I know others have gone through contentious divorces and will provide you with much needed support.

mamatink7
by Franceska on Jun. 26, 2014 at 2:36 PM

yes, actually it wasnt wanted but we had to do it (he kept leaving and cheating after many years of abuse)

you need to get a lawyer, bring diagnosis paperwork with you. i never get child support, we call it spousal support so he will always get SSI. have the support go to 21 or 30yrs old. make the plan very flexible (stating depending on childs behaviors and healthwise will determine where they go and when) everything has to state FLEXIBILITY. you need to research different lawyers to find one dealt with special needs kids during a divorce. 

it will be hard. for 2 years, he never had him over nights. whenever he wanted to do anything then he came over or we took him out together. he wont go over if he had a bad wk or been sick, if he wants to stay w me then he will. generally during summer, he goes there for 2 wks straight. but has been different past couple of summers.

if you have any questions or support or vent during this difficult time PLEASE message me. there are things i dont want to say here cause open but i will let you know more detailed in messaging

JTMOM422
by Brenda on Jun. 26, 2014 at 5:24 PM

So sorry you are going through this momma. I have not gone through a divorce where kids were involved. I hope that your husband learns to understand that the autism label is needed for them to get the appropriate help. Should you get a divorce I would ask that it be mandated that should he have the kids at times that he continues to take them to therapy

JudyE07
by Member on Jun. 26, 2014 at 11:21 PM
2 moms liked this

My exhusband was very abusive in every kind of way and even killed the cat. He used fear to keep me from talking and never worked and watched our two kids every second. He even followed me to the bathroom even when I was on my monthly. One night he left for a while and came back a sec later and caught me throwing clothes in a bag. He screwed the back door shut and sat on the couch all night and watched the front door. The second time we ran with the clothes on our backs and nothing else! But I got my divorce and made damn sure he got supervised visitation. The spanking he got  from God was far worse then anything life nor I  could have dealt  him.I got help from my local womans shelter. Check for one and they will give you advice

Charizma77
by Carissa on Jun. 27, 2014 at 12:17 AM

I haven't been but want you to know we are here for you. Hugs! 

Rosebud27aj
by Amanda on Jun. 27, 2014 at 12:38 AM
1 mom liked this

I haven't. Big Hugs!

bump!

btherese
by on Jun. 27, 2014 at 1:21 PM
1 mom liked this

I will keep you in my prayers. I have been there but each situation is different.

Hottubgodess
by Jackie on Jun. 27, 2014 at 1:53 PM
1 mom liked this

I agree with suggestions given by Mamatink.  Good luck and prayers.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)