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Had a miscarriage

Posted by on Jul. 23, 2014 at 3:13 PM
  • 12 Replies

Doc didnt find a heart beat, it was 9 weeks old. I conceived so easily, it was just too good to be true. I never get things so easily in life, so this was bound to happen. I regret having told my 3.5 year old son. I told him cause he used to be rough and fall on my tummy. Since the day I told him he was very careful and always touched by belly once a day. He was looking forward to having a sibling. He used to talk about it everyday. How exactly do I explain this to him? I should not have told him that early.

by on Jul. 23, 2014 at 3:13 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Macphee
by Silver Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 6:24 PM
Hugs first and foremost.

Death is tough to explain, so abstract. Tell him the facts, baby's heart stopped beating. You need your heart to beat to live.

I'm so sorry for you. That's really difficult. Please seek grief counseling.
Noahs-Mom
by Bronze Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 6:35 PM

I would tell him that God needed the baby back. 

SamMom912
by Platinum Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 6:37 PM
Hugs... I've been there.. When Sam was 5. Rough spot... My heart breaks for you and your hubby. Try to take good care of yourself. I'm so deeply sorry for your loss.


In a few days when your ready to face this u could tell your son that sometimes the babies don't make it thru the first few weeks of being made... and God calls them back to him.

Honestly at so young I don't know I'd say anything; I might say the doctor or you made a mistake and there is no baby, not right now, but someday there will be; just not now.

I just don't know if I would want to discuss death- miscarriages- for fear that he may worry about himself since he's your baby..and kids are so egocentric he may read too much into baby's dying..

I'm really so sad for you.... :( big hug my friend.
Nicole_2007
by Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 6:57 PM

I am so sorry for your loss.  I would do like someone else said and say god needed the baby back

Logansmom1999
by Kristina on Jul. 23, 2014 at 7:02 PM

I am so sorry. I have had 3 still births (actually 2 - one was twins) and 7 miscarriages. I feel your pain. It is something that is so raw that only another woman having had a miscarriage can truly understand. That was a child. You had all the normal hopes and dreams that every other parent has. Please seek counseling

As far as talking to your son, I simply told my small children that the baby went to be with Jesus...he needed him/her more. I don't know if you are religious but if not we will have to come up with something else for you.

{{{HUGZ Mama}}}

wildchild.com
by Janine on Jul. 23, 2014 at 8:10 PM
I'm so sorry mama (hugs)
57plus
by on Jul. 23, 2014 at 8:51 PM
So sorry. Been there. It's ok you shared. Kids are resilient. Don't be so hard in yourself.
sunshinepraying
by Bronze Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 9:23 PM
I'm so sorry for your loss.
TheJerseyGirl
by on Jul. 23, 2014 at 9:35 PM

I'm so sorry, mama.

I think he's too young to be able to deal with death that way. I would say mommy is hoping for a baby, but we dont have one yet! You could also say he's an angel now if you think it's something your son would be ok with.

My first pregnancy ended in miscarriage and it broke my heart. There's no way to make sense of it but I hope you are blessed with the family you want!

(((HUGS)))

Charizma77
by Carissa on Jul. 24, 2014 at 12:31 AM

I am so sorry for your loss. I think these ladies gave you some good advice. Hugs

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