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Autism - Support Across the Spectrum Autism - Support Across the Spectrum

Lots of life changes and Self Harming

Posted by on Aug. 31, 2014 at 8:37 AM
  • 28 Replies

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In the last month we have had 2 deaths in the family, my father-in-law was in the hospital, and my husband lost his job after 28 years with the company.

School starts on Tuesday. We now have a new Principal. I received an email that his aide moved, so he will be getting a new one. To top it all off, I got a call the other night that our Vice-Principal suddenly retired and there is a new one.

My poor kid is so anxious and stressed out. He is picking at his skin, pulling out teeth, chewing on the inside of his mouth. I'm forever cleaning up some kind of bloody mess.

I feel like I'm throwing him to the wolves. There is no consistency from last school year.

I have brought him to the school and was able to show him where his classrooms are. We met the new Principal and Vice-Principal. He won't be able to meet his new aide until I hand him off to her.

I'm a nervous wreck. Last year was awful. My record is 5 times at school in one day.

Just please say a prayer that it's better this year. Any advice would be appreciated too!
by on Aug. 31, 2014 at 8:37 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Macphee
by Bronze Member on Aug. 31, 2014 at 9:40 AM
Hugs

Mom, you're stressed and need to find ways to cope. It sucks when life hits you all at once.

Ds may be picking up on your stress. It sounds like you guys need silly play time. Put on music and just be a kid with your guy.

I am sending blessings and positive energy your way. I am so sorry.
shunnicutt
by Stephanie on Aug. 31, 2014 at 9:42 AM

Wow, big hugs to you Mama!  Will pray for your sweet little man.

wildchild.com
by Janine on Aug. 31, 2014 at 10:02 AM
Sending prayers out! I know how you feel last year was a complete disaster. I've had to reassure my son over & over he will no longer have the same teacher. My son chews the inside of his cheeks too. (((Hugs)))
tracy0812
by Member on Aug. 31, 2014 at 10:35 AM
As strange as this may sound, hubby and I are actually less stressed since he lost his job. His work hours were long and his job stressful. We've been trying to get Jake out of the house more, but that seems to stress him out.


Thank you for the blessings and positive energy! I'll take anything I can get!


Quoting Macphee: Hugs

Mom, you're stressed and need to find ways to cope. It sucks when life hits you all at once.

Ds may be picking up on your stress. It sounds like you guys need silly play time. Put on music and just be a kid with your guy.

I am sending blessings and positive energy your way. I am so sorry.
tracy0812
by Member on Aug. 31, 2014 at 10:37 AM
Thanks so much for the hugs and prayers!

Quoting shunnicutt:

Wow, big hugs to you Mama!  Will pray for your sweet little man.

tracy0812
by Member on Aug. 31, 2014 at 10:39 AM
1 mom liked this
Thank you for the prayers! Jake is in middle school, so he has different teachers for every class. Just an FYI, we found an oral rinse, by Colgate I believe, it helps to keep the mouth sores clean and helps to keep infection away.

Quoting wildchild.com: Sending prayers out! I know how you feel last year was a complete disaster. I've had to reassure my son over & over he will no longer have the same teacher. My son chews the inside of his cheeks too. (((Hugs)))
Mwheels72
by Member on Aug. 31, 2014 at 11:04 AM

I'm sorry to hear of the losses and  may your loved ones have peace. I know you are going through some turbulent times. But you know have you ever heard that phrase when God closes one door he opens a window. Maybe there's a window of new horizons waiting for you and your husband. So I will send prayers for a new start.

Sometimes I have read that kids self injure themselves because they feel pain somewhere else. They look like canker sores maybe some canker sore meds would help. Does your son have issues with his teeth? Or just a nervous tic of chewing the inside of his mouth? Would a mouth guard help? Or a trip to the dentist.  Would Chewing gum or hard candies help? something to calm the nerves? Something to Distract him for awhile.  I am still waiting for my son to get new teeth and not looking forward it. 

If you are nervous about the new aid, maybe sitting down and writing a few things she should know about your son ahead of time might help. I can't promise you it will be a good or bad year it varies for me as well. But try to go in with a positive vibe to start. Because you never know what the year will bring. I can't say you will not have good days and bad days but I will pray that you find away through them with God's support. angel 

tracy0812
by Member on Aug. 31, 2014 at 1:20 PM
1 mom liked this
Thank you so much for your kind words!

We have a plethora of chewy tubes for him to choose from. They work, maybe half the time. The doctor thinks it's a nervous tic. We've made the school aware of it and we supply chewy tubes so they are available to him at all times.

I'm hoping the school will give us a few minutes with the new aide before the day starts. We do have a communication notebook that goes back and forth.

Again, thank you!!


Quoting Mwheels72:

I'm sorry to hear of the losses and  may your loved ones have peace. I know you are going through some turbulent times. But you know have you ever heard that phrase when God closes one door he opens a window. Maybe there's a window of new horizons waiting for you and your husband. So I will send prayers for a new start.

Sometimes I have read that kids self injure themselves because they feel pain somewhere else. They look like canker sores maybe some canker sore meds would help. Does your son have issues with his teeth? Or just a nervous tic of chewing the inside of his mouth? Would a mouth guard help? Or a trip to the dentist.  Would Chewing gum or hard candies help? something to calm the nerves? Something to Distract him for awhile.  I am still waiting for my son to get new teeth and not looking forward it. 

If you are nervous about the new aid, maybe sitting down and writing a few things she should know about your son ahead of time might help. I can't promise you it will be a good or bad year it varies for me as well. But try to go in with a positive vibe to start. Because you never know what the year will bring. I can't say you will not have good days and bad days but I will pray that you find away through them with God's support. angel 

HFBMOM
by Julie on Aug. 31, 2014 at 5:08 PM

Does Jake go with you to IEP meetings? I have a 15 year old son, but he went to several of the meetings in middle school and was allowed to have a voice in what was going to happen. He is in 10th grade now, and maturity has helped as much as anything else. Age 12 was the hardest year seconded by age 14. 13 wasn't as bad... Now that he's 15, and we have adjusted his anti-seizure meds, he is feeling much better.

Quoting tracy0812: Thank you for the prayers! Jake is in middle school, so he has different teachers for every class. Just an FYI, we found an oral rinse, by Colgate I believe, it helps to keep the mouth sores clean and helps to keep infection away.
Quoting wildchild.com: Sending prayers out! I know how you feel last year was a complete disaster. I've had to reassure my son over & over he will no longer have the same teacher. My son chews the inside of his cheeks too. (((Hugs)))


Khanfan
by on Aug. 31, 2014 at 5:18 PM

I'm glad I stopped by to read this. I'm not in the group. My dd had been cutting herself, medication was started and she mostly has stopped. I'll say prayers for you.


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