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im back and lost

Posted by on Nov. 4, 2014 at 7:48 AM
  • 14 Replies

Hi ladies!  Ive been gone for a while now.  Life is just so hectic.  Im just lost and no one is getting it.  Ryan just turned 4yr the other week.  I can't believe he's 4 already.  So he's been seriously struggling.  He's spinning, hand flapping, aggressive to me, chewing everything.  He chewed his bed to the point it looks like a dog got it.  He chewed his foot til it bled.  So I have a camera in his room now and I give him his chewy when he goes to bed and I just watch and wait for him to fall asleep and I take the chewy.  He is struggling at school big time.  Unable to make friends as he goes about it the wrong way.  He went after some kids on the bus and has to sit alone now.  Then we got him a squeeze vest.  I put him on the bus yesterday with the vest on and his chewy.  I was a little nervous about it as I don't want Ryan to feel different.  I know he is I suppose but why should a 4yr think that.  So the bus driver takes one look at him and says, what's this a costume!  I gave her the dirtiest look and pulled her aside and told her what it was.  Today I will be pulling her aside and telling her if she has any questions regarding my son to ask me, and not to do make such an insensitive comment esp in front of my child.  I already had to complain to the school which I never do for the bus aides not helping Ryan on and off the bus.  The child gets PT.  I even told them on the first day as they weren't helping.  And even after I told them they still didnt' help so thats why I called the school.   Any ways His OT at school said it truly helped him since he had to be pulled from his class and moved to a smaller one.  He couldn't handle the noise.  His tantrums are insane and exhausting.  My dh works 7 days a week now and Im on my own.  I have to juggle talking to PT, OT, ABA, teachers, 4 diff drs.  I have 2 jobs myself too.  Then I have Samuel who is 4mo delayed and is being evaluated by a dev mental ped.  He is finally crawling but no talking more growling going on.  Im just spinning with Ryan it feels like.  Im the type of person when Im stressed I can't eat.  Im down to 110lb now.  So Im hearing everyone tell me how skinny I am and how I need to eat.  Im trying I truly am but I stressed.  I even called a mom2mom group yesterday while Ryan was in school and I thought it was a place for me to vent and talk to another mom.  Basically I got this woman telling me fight this, fight that.  I don't want to fight the world.  I want to help my son and I feel as tho I have a great team of therapist but this woman was angry spice.  Ok I think Ive gone on long enough.  Im sorry if Im vent is all over the place but my thoughts are all over right now.  thanks to any support ladies.  

by on Nov. 4, 2014 at 7:48 AM
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Replies (1-10):
SamMom912
by Platinum Member on Nov. 4, 2014 at 8:08 AM
1 mom liked this

Ahhhhh so happy to see you!!!!! Sooooo sorry things sound so stressful. 

I too feel your pain with "fighting, fighting, fighting!!!!" It's exhausting... And it REALLY shouldn't be that way!!! These are children who need HELP! Why does help seem so elusive... Why must we fight to get it!?!?!

BIG HUG  my friend!!! HUGE HUG!

and I. Don't mean to sound dismissive... But can I see a BIGGER picture of those gorgeous boys of yours?!?! 

perrywinkle
by Bronze Member on Nov. 4, 2014 at 8:42 AM
1 mom liked this

I am sorry you are having such a rough day. Sometimes you can only keep hanging in there and take it day by day. I know how hard it is to watch your kids struggle and not be able to help. Maybe Ryan is just having problems adjusting to school and will get better as he is more comfortable. And helping Samual with his delays so young will help him immensely. He can catch up faster with help so early. You are doing a great job.

MamaLauri
by Silver Member on Nov. 4, 2014 at 9:14 AM
1 mom liked this

Hugs. Feel free to vent here.

Has your son's team explained the way forward? That can relieve stress if you know what to expect, and how you can help.

othermom
by on Nov. 4, 2014 at 9:35 AM
1 mom liked this

Hugs, that would be very tough

Momof4AEMW
by Platinum Member on Nov. 4, 2014 at 10:00 AM
1 mom liked this

Big hugs!!!  I'm glad you're back!!  I'm sorry things are so hard right now, but you're doing the right thing coming here to blow off some steam.  You do need people that 'get' it even if they are not physically in your life.  We understand!!!  Big hugs!

charley31
by Bronze Member on Nov. 4, 2014 at 10:38 AM
1 mom liked this
Thank you! Glad to be back! You ladies I feel are the only ones that do get me and my struggles.

Quoting Momof4AEMW:

Big hugs!!!  I'm glad you're back!!  I'm sorry things are so hard right now, but you're doing the right thing coming here to blow off some steam.  You do need people that 'get' it even if they are not physically in your life.  We understand!!!  Big hugs!

charley31
by Bronze Member on Nov. 4, 2014 at 10:39 AM
No I've never heard of this?

Quoting MamaLauri:

Hugs. Feel free to vent here.

Has your son's team explained the way forward? That can relieve stress if you know what to expect, and how you can help.

samomama
by Sally on Nov. 4, 2014 at 10:41 AM
1 mom liked this

Hugs momma! Vent away.

MamaLauri
by Silver Member on Nov. 4, 2014 at 11:38 AM
1 mom liked this

Periodically, your team should do an assessment, and share the results with you. Ideally, they should explain what they have been doing, how he has responded, what next, and how the therapy can be further supported at home. If they are not doing this, ask them to.

Quoting charley31: No I've never heard of this?
Quoting MamaLauri:

Hugs. Feel free to vent here.

Has your son's team explained the way forward? That can relieve stress if you know what to expect, and how you can help.


wildchild.com
by Janine on Nov. 4, 2014 at 11:46 AM
1 mom liked this
(((Hugs)))& welcome back.
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