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Violent kid in class

Posted by on May. 16, 2017 at 5:32 PM
  • 10 Replies
So my dd (10) is autistic and in a self contained class. She is verbal, but can't tell me about her day or what happened.
Today at pick up I was visiting with another mom of a kid in Dd's class, and she told me that a student (g) had slapped her son on the face yesterday, and after she got him home he also had a bite mark from him. She showed me a picture of the bite and it looked terrible, the whole thing was bruised and clear teeth marks. She sent a pic to their teacher. Than today he got scratched on the neck by the same kid.
Last year G kicked my 7 yo gen ed kid in the privates also....
G has TWO full time para eds.
I'm just not sure what I should do, if anything. To be honest it makes me uncomfortable to have him in my kids class since he is this violet and the para eds clearly don't have control over him. He hasn't hurt my dd, but it still seems pretty likely to happen eventually.
What would you do?
by on May. 16, 2017 at 5:32 PM
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Replies (1-10):
ineedcoffeemom
by Brittaney on May. 16, 2017 at 6:49 PM
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When the teachers and unable to keep the classmates safe, it is an indication its not the proper classroom for that child. Your dd has a right to a safe learning environment. If the child is harming others infrequently, like every 2-3 months I think they can work on better classroom managament. But if hes hurting someone weekly or more often than that, I think you have every right to come forward and say the other kids are being denied and thats not ok.
LadyAmaranth
by Silver Member on May. 16, 2017 at 6:58 PM
1 mom liked this

I'd have to discuss my concerns with the principal and teachers/paras.
It's obvious they aren't doing right on either front as the paras should be containing the violent child and if they can't than they need to discuss another placement with his parents. Its NOT ok that this child is allowed to keep hurting others especially when he has 2 people that should be assisting in keeping him occupied, etc.

MamaLauri
by Silver Member on May. 16, 2017 at 7:19 PM

I would inform the teachers and since they are already aware, I would also inform the principal that this is happening regularly without effective intervention and you are concerned about your and other children (include pictures). I would ask what they are doing to insure this does not happen again and remind them they are legally responsible to provide a safe environment. If they fail to respond effectively, I would inform the school board and police of their failure.

Of course, keep documentation.

If it is appropriate for your dd I would encourage traditional martial arts training that teaches self-control, respect, as well as self-defense. It is excellent sensory and executive function exercise for 5 years and above.

marilyn623
by New Member on May. 16, 2017 at 7:31 PM
Thank you. I seem to run into issues of confidentiality. The teachers and principal seem to talk around the issue, not name names, etc.

Quoting MamaLauri:

I would inform the teachers and since they are already aware, I would also inform the principal that this is happening regularly without effective intervention and you are concerned about your and other children (include pictures). I would ask what they are doing to insure this does not happen again and remind them they are legally responsible to provide a safe environment. If they fail to respond effectively, I would inform the school board and police of their failure.

Of course, keep documentation.

If it is appropriate for your dd I would encourage traditional martial arts training that teaches self-control, respect, as well as self-defense. It is excellent sensory and executive function exercise for 5 years and above.

ineedcoffeemom
by Brittaney on May. 16, 2017 at 7:47 PM
Encourage the mom of the child who got hurt to step forward. There shouldnt be confidentiality issues for her. If another child hurt my child Id have a right to know exactly how they planned on not letting it happen again.

Quoting marilyn623: Thank you. I seem to run into issues of confidentiality. The teachers and principal seem to talk around the issue, not name names, etc.

Quoting MamaLauri:

I would inform the teachers and since they are already aware, I would also inform the principal that this is happening regularly without effective intervention and you are concerned about your and other children (include pictures). I would ask what they are doing to insure this does not happen again and remind them they are legally responsible to provide a safe environment. If they fail to respond effectively, I would inform the school board and police of their failure.

Of course, keep documentation.

If it is appropriate for your dd I would encourage traditional martial arts training that teaches self-control, respect, as well as self-defense. It is excellent sensory and executive function exercise for 5 years and above.

MamaLauri
by Silver Member on May. 16, 2017 at 7:49 PM

That can part of the issue. So then the offending child has no fault because they are claiming no responsibility of the child through their protection of that child, then the teachers and staff are fully at fault. The wounds are real. You have the right to protect and demand protection of your child. They can not insist on protecting privacy of the assaulting child without physical protection of vulnerable children under their care. You can talk about events without names. So document the adults present. Let them know they are knowledgeable and protecting the assaulting child, therefore are fully responsible for each and every event.

Quoting marilyn623: Thank you. I seem to run into issues of confidentiality. The teachers and principal seem to talk around the issue, not name names, etc.
Quoting MamaLauri:

I would inform the teachers and since they are already aware, I would also inform the principal that this is happening regularly without effective intervention and you are concerned about your and other children (include pictures). I would ask what they are doing to insure this does not happen again and remind them they are legally responsible to provide a safe environment. If they fail to respond effectively, I would inform the school board and police of their failure.

Of course, keep documentation.

If it is appropriate for your dd I would encourage traditional martial arts training that teaches self-control, respect, as well as self-defense. It is excellent sensory and executive function exercise for 5 years and above.


mamamedic69
by Bronze Member on May. 16, 2017 at 9:53 PM

You and the other mom need to voice your concerns to the administration. Everyone in the class should feel safe and if that one child is being violent then they need to revaluate where he really needs to be.

MixedCooke
by Group Admin on May. 17, 2017 at 1:34 AM

Considering it is my daughter that has slapped and kicked a para-ed, I think to some degree that they need to take responsibility in removing them from the situation that has caused the tantrum/meltdown, etc.  For example, my daughter has sensory processing disorder and things such as another child crying sets her off.  She isnt intentionally trying to be aggressive but trying to stop the sound from hurting her ears.  I am not excusing her behavior in any way though.

mrswillie
by Member on May. 17, 2017 at 7:45 AM
I would talk to the school, and possibly even get the other mother to go with you. Maybe you two can schedule a meeting and voice your concerns with all the adults in the class as well as the principal.
johnny4ever
by on May. 17, 2017 at 4:42 PM


Quoting mamamedic69:

You and the other mom need to voice your concerns to the administration. Everyone in the class should feel safe and if that one child is being violent then they need to revaluate where he really needs to be.

As a Para Ed. I totally agree with you.

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