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Update on Amelia

Posted by on Apr. 19, 2018 at 12:08 PM
  • 2 Replies

Amelia turned 17 last month.  I have a hard time realizing she is actually 17.  In some ways she is years younger and in other ways older.  She still has all the issues but things have changed as she has gotten older.  The severe anxiety and some executive function issues still persist and cause many problems.  She also fights depression constantly.  She still has meltdowns usually anxiety related.  Socially she is awkward.  She was active in a local Teen/Young Adult Autism Group for awhile, but someone had a meltdown at her 16th birthday party and well she was ticked about it.  The problem is she doesn't fit with NT kids and she doesn't fit with the autistic group either (she is too high functioning, too smart at least that is what she thinks).  She now declares that she has Aspergers and that diagnosis shouldn't have been included in with Autism and then later after a meltdown she will say that she is Autistic.  I just go with the flow.  It is a fine line how much to push and when to stand back. 

She is officially a senior in high school but since she is doing a distance learning program through Laurel Springs she won't graduate until June of 2019.  Then she will attend the local community college.  Eventually we hope she can go away to college.  She has straight A's in high school but can't tolerate to take more than 4 courses at a time - too much stress.  She is not good at math but excels in English and Art.  The kid can write and draw - not quite sure where that is going but am hoping she can develop a career in there.

We are always searching for appropriate socializing opportunities.  She has done 4H rabbit group for 8 years but she is really done with that.  We found a high school art studio class in a nearby town which she likes.  She has also started attending a D&D game group in another nearby town.  Since she doesn't drive yet - well my husband and I have a weekly date night.

Now that brings up driving - a rather charged topic at this time.  We just brought a new "family" car specifically to use to teach Amelia to drive.  She is so mad because we keep driving the little Toyota Corolla.  I really like that little car because it is so much easier to handle the Suburban beast and the gas mileage is so much better.  I enrolled her in a online drving course for preparation for the written driving test.  She just told me yesterday that she wants us to sit with her while she does the online course ...so I guess my husband and I will take turns sitting with her while she does the online course.  The real problem will be handling the anxiety - driving involves being alert, having all this stuff going on and responding appropriately.  Well, she has issues with all that.  Both my husband and I figure this driving thing will take a long while before it actually happens - we are thinking at least a year maybe longer. We think that being able to drive will give Amelia independence and help her self-image.

Just wanted to give an update.  I still read the posts but just don't post so much anymore.  Some of the battles change as your ASD kid gets older. It becomes difficult to tell what is teen angst and what is autism. I remember all those meltdowns and getting called into school sometimes once or twice a week.  The issues aren't gone but they have changed.  I think things have gotten better.  I have learned how to deal with things better and my daughter has matured. 


by on Apr. 19, 2018 at 12:08 PM
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SamMom912
by Platinum Member on Apr. 19, 2018 at 5:16 PM
Driving is SO scary. Its SO many things put together. Being in a heavily populated area, Ill probably teach Sam waaay upstate or on the moon?! Lol!

Glad the DnD stuff is going well. Thats cool. We play with Sam. Im not very good at it.

Sounds like things are good/different.

Hoping she can figure out a cool opportunity with the drawing & stories. Its a great mix. ๐Ÿ‘
Bobcatridge
by Carol on Apr. 19, 2018 at 10:41 PM

Thankfully we are rural.  Nearest town has 20,000 people.  Now to get down our mountain you have to drive down 2 miles of very winding one lane roads with cliffs and then a minimum of another 8 miles into the nearest town- again on a very winding road - at least it has two lanes.  Initially we will drive her into town for driving practice.  No way do I expect her to drive to town initially.  We had one friend who told us she was never coming to see us again because of our mountain road - she did but I appreciate the problem. There was the gardener who got sick everytime he came to work on the lawn. And then there was the 8 yr old friend who got car sick and really did never come again. Oh well, but we love our mountain retreat.  

She draws character sheets for her D & D characters. I love seeing the drawings and hearing about the characters.

Quoting SamMom912: Driving is SO scary. Its SO many things put together. Being in a heavily populated area, Ill probably teach Sam waaay upstate or on the moon?! Lol! Glad the DnD stuff is going well. Thats cool. We play with Sam. Im not very good at it. Sounds like things are good/different. Hoping she can figure out a cool opportunity with the drawing & stories. Its a great mix. ๐Ÿ‘


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