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Homeschooling Moms Homeschooling Moms

So I am thinking we are the other................ (no bashing please).

Posted by on Jan. 27, 2012 at 8:34 PM
  • 17 Replies

 Part of homeschooling, you know the not every parent/child can homeschool.  I have been trying to homeschool my DS this year, I have let him have 4 months of deschooling, where we basically did nothing but math, some reading and science, his request.  In January he knew he had to buckle down, I signed him up for time 4 learning, and while he likes it, he still sits here and whines about having to do the work, I have to read all lessons to him or they don't get done because he says he doesn't understand it, but can sit there and answer all questions, etc.  When we were de-schooling he would do the same thing whine about everything or just flat out refuse to do anything. 

He is in 5th grade this year and he just hasn't done much of anything to show me he is learining, all he wants to do is sit around watching tv and playing with his toys all day. I know he can do the work and he was never like this in school except  with writing, even when he had homework I would help him and he did it without too many problelms or whining.  There are days more often than not lately where I just want to hit my head against the wall because we can spend two hours doing one lesosn that should take 30 minutes to complete.  Then when it's time for the PS sutdents bus to come around he gets mad because he still has several lessons to do and he wont' get to go out to play.  I have tried grounding him, taking away things/privleges, rewards, bribery, etc, and nothing seems to work with him. 

We will be moving the end of next month and so I am thinking about putting him back on the wait list for this really good charter school that he had been approved for just before we moved last year.  I just don't know what else to do with him, he refuses to do the work, won't listen and seriously I think he misses being around the other kids.  He is an only child, even tho he does sports, goes to church, plays with the neighbors etc, it's just like he wants to go back to school, without saying that is what he wants.  I don't what else to do/try with him and this school while it would still be PS is not at all like the PS system. 

by on Jan. 27, 2012 at 8:34 PM
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Replies (1-10):
bugayfamilyof4
by Member on Jan. 27, 2012 at 8:58 PM

What about a co-op??? They are fun and he would see the same kids several times a week. He sounds like he needs more hands on things. Like maybe using Lego's or science experiments. It must be hard being the only child at home but you are his mom and you know what is best for him. Are there any museums near by that you all could go and learn some stuff about.

5BMom
by on Jan. 27, 2012 at 10:38 PM
Maybe he needs homeschooling to be more fun.... No school at home....
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usmom3
by BJ on Jan. 27, 2012 at 10:53 PM

 I agree with the other Moms maybe try to do thing like they said for a while. Also ask him what he wants to learn & how he would like to learn it, let him have control over some things.

hottmommi42
by on Jan. 27, 2012 at 11:29 PM
1 mom liked this
Well, I am not going to push my opinion too much here, but I would like you to think of a few questions. What do you want for your children as adults?
Do you think that them being surrounded by love at home will accomplish that, or do you think the rigid structure of public school will be more helpful?
I can say that as grown ups my kids will be successful adults if they are amazing and passionate communicators, and be able to find any answer they need on their own with persistance. I know that no one can do that better than my husband and I. But, this is our conviction.
Have you looked what his learning style is? Have you asked him what he wants to learn about? Maybe giving him more control would be helpful. He's old enough to take charge of his own learning. Double check your homeschool laws and make sure you have to use a curriculum. If you don't have to, throw it away. It sounds like its just causing more stress than its worth. Maybe try a unit study about something he wants to do (science and math seems to strike his fancy, maybe study the one and outs or the blue spruce there is tons of science, math, history, social studies and reading right there.) A lot of times you can creatively meet state guidlines if you really look around.
If not, don't feel like you failed. It's not for everyone. Every one can, but it doesn't mean that everyone should. As long as everyone is on board, go for it. Good luck!
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Silverkitty
by Bronze Member on Jan. 27, 2012 at 11:46 PM
Sounds like he might also have a slight learning disability or lazy reading. My dd can read well but comprehends poorly, unless read to. She is also in 5th, but we are working on vocabulary and spelling all over again, in hopes to help her decoded things better. Looking in to what he wants to learn along with what he has to learn, might help.
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noraa21
by Member on Jan. 28, 2012 at 12:24 AM

 

Quoting hottmommi42:

Well, I am not going to push my opinion too much here, but I would like you to think of a few questions. What do you want for your children as adults?
Do you think that them being surrounded by love at home will accomplish that, or do you think the rigid structure of public school will be more helpful?
I can say that as grown ups my kids will be successful adults if they are amazing and passionate communicators, and be able to find any answer they need on their own with persistance. I know that no one can do that better than my husband and I. But, this is our conviction.
Have you looked what his learning style is? Have you asked him what he wants to learn about? Maybe giving him more control would be helpful. He's old enough to take charge of his own learning. Double check your homeschool laws and make sure you have to use a curriculum. If you don't have to, throw it away. It sounds like its just causing more stress than its worth. Maybe try a unit study about something he wants to do (science and math seems to strike his fancy, maybe study the one and outs or the blue spruce there is tons of science, math, history, social studies and reading right there.) A lot of times you can creatively meet state guidlines if you really look around.
If not, don't feel like you failed. It's not for everyone. Every one can, but it doesn't mean that everyone should. As long as everyone is on board, go for it. Good luck!

Thank you, he seems to learn best by hands on and visual, although I have noticed lately he is starting to also learn by auditory, like if I read something to him, but still not the best way for him.  As for state laws I can basically do what ever, we just have to have them tested at the appropriate grade levels which would be this year for him.  I have asked him what he wants to learn about and all he ever says is star wars, legos, and his newest thing robots.

We did do a lesson thing on lego's several months ago and he wasn't into it.  I agree he should be able to take charge of his learning but he doesn't seem to know how or what he wants to do.  He also has autism and ADHD and has a hard time making decsions, so I don't know if I should maybe try limiting the choices to two or three things for him to pick from to learn about and see what he does with that. 

bmw29
by Member on Jan. 28, 2012 at 12:30 AM

 I will add that my ds HATES time 4 learning. I honestly thought it was a little goofy myself. Maybe just try a new method.

hottmommi42
by on Jan. 28, 2012 at 12:52 AM
1 mom liked this
Do you know if those tests have to be graded? I know it sounds silly, but in my state I have to issue grade level testing, but they don't have to be graded (crazy, right?) Plus, if he has autism, he should qualify for iep's. Which will be really helpful for you. There is so much to mix in with robots! Do you know for sure that he isn't learning? Is it possible that he is hyper smart, and is also stubborn? Maybe he is learning faster than the material teaches it. This is a tough spot. My cousin has aspergers (sp?) And adhd, and I have seen him struggle, but if we give that kid something electronic that is broken, he can fix it in 5 minutes flat. Then, type exactly what he did, in complete sentences (dont ask him to write though, it gets stuck between his brain and fingers) and give you the math equations that he used to measure the electrical current. You ask him if he thinks that throwing the glass in the sink is a good idea, he freezes and literally has a panic attack. Zero social awareness, zero critical thinking. But, genius in his own rite. It's amazing (he was born at 26 weeks, we honesty didn't think he would live). Right now he is trying to learn how to figure out if he has enough money in his wallet to buy eggs and bread, and what it means to sign a lease but he will never suffer for work. I share this only because there are so many things to learn besides algebra. And, its hard to watch someone you love struggle.
I hope you guys can find something that will fit all your needs, like you have expressed, everyone seems less than thrilled right now. Here's a lil glimmer of hope, and know you are not alone! Thank you for sharing your struggle, I am sure many of us will learn a thing or two from all you share!


Quoting noraa21:

 


Quoting hottmommi42:

Well, I am not going to push my opinion too much here, but I would like you to think of a few questions. What do you want for your children as adults?
Do you think that them being surrounded by love at home will accomplish that, or do you think the rigid structure of public school will be more helpful?
I can say that as grown ups my kids will be successful adults if they are amazing and passionate communicators, and be able to find any answer they need on their own with persistance. I know that no one can do that better than my husband and I. But, this is our conviction.
Have you looked what his learning style is? Have you asked him what he wants to learn about? Maybe giving him more control would be helpful. He's old enough to take charge of his own learning. Double check your homeschool laws and make sure you have to use a curriculum. If you don't have to, throw it away. It sounds like its just causing more stress than its worth. Maybe try a unit study about something he wants to do (science and math seems to strike his fancy, maybe study the one and outs or the blue spruce there is tons of science, math, history, social studies and reading right there.) A lot of times you can creatively meet state guidlines if you really look around.
If not, don't feel like you failed. It's not for everyone. Every one can, but it doesn't mean that everyone should. As long as everyone is on board, go for it. Good luck!

Thank you, he seems to learn best by hands on and visual, although I have noticed lately he is starting to also learn by auditory, like if I read something to him, but still not the best way for him.  As for state laws I can basically do what ever, we just have to have them tested at the appropriate grade levels which would be this year for him.  I have asked him what he wants to learn about and all he ever says is star wars, legos, and his newest thing robots.


We did do a lesson thing on lego's several months ago and he wasn't into it.  I agree he should be able to take charge of his learning but he doesn't seem to know how or what he wants to do.  He also has autism and ADHD and has a hard time making decsions, so I don't know if I should maybe try limiting the choices to two or three things for him to pick from to learn about and see what he does with that. 


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noraa21
by Member on Jan. 28, 2012 at 1:22 AM

 

Quoting hottmommi42:

Do you know if those tests have to be graded? I know it sounds silly, but in my state I have to issue grade level testing, but they don't have to be graded (crazy, right?) Plus, if he has autism, he should qualify for iep's. Which will be really helpful for you. There is so much to mix in with robots! Do you know for sure that he isn't learning? Is it possible that he is hyper smart, and is also stubborn? Maybe he is learning faster than the material teaches it. This is a tough spot. My cousin has aspergers (sp?) And adhd, and I have seen him struggle, but if we give that kid something electronic that is broken, he can fix it in 5 minutes flat. Then, type exactly what he did, in complete sentences (dont ask him to write though, it gets stuck between his brain and fingers) and give you the math equations that he used to measure the electrical current. You ask him if he thinks that throwing the glass in the sink is a good idea, he freezes and literally has a panic attack. Zero social awareness, zero critical thinking. But, genius in his own rite. It's amazing (he was born at 26 weeks, we honesty didn't think he would live). Right now he is trying to learn how to figure out if he has enough money in his wallet to buy eggs and bread, and what it means to sign a lease but he will never suffer for work. I share this only because there are so many things to learn besides algebra. And, its hard to watch someone you love struggle.
I hope you guys can find something that will fit all your needs, like you have expressed, everyone seems less than thrilled right now. Here's a lil glimmer of hope, and know you are not alone! Thank you for sharing your struggle, I am sure many of us will learn a thing or two from all you share!


Quoting noraa21:

 


Quoting hottmommi42:

Well, I am not going to push my opinion too much here, but I would like you to think of a few questions. What do you want for your children as adults?
Do you think that them being surrounded by love at home will accomplish that, or do you think the rigid structure of public school will be more helpful?
I can say that as grown ups my kids will be successful adults if they are amazing and passionate communicators, and be able to find any answer they need on their own with persistance. I know that no one can do that better than my husband and I. But, this is our conviction.
Have you looked what his learning style is? Have you asked him what he wants to learn about? Maybe giving him more control would be helpful. He's old enough to take charge of his own learning. Double check your homeschool laws and make sure you have to use a curriculum. If you don't have to, throw it away. It sounds like its just causing more stress than its worth. Maybe try a unit study about something he wants to do (science and math seems to strike his fancy, maybe study the one and outs or the blue spruce there is tons of science, math, history, social studies and reading right there.) A lot of times you can creatively meet state guidlines if you really look around.
If not, don't feel like you failed. It's not for everyone. Every one can, but it doesn't mean that everyone should. As long as everyone is on board, go for it. Good luck!

Thank you, he seems to learn best by hands on and visual, although I have noticed lately he is starting to also learn by auditory, like if I read something to him, but still not the best way for him.  As for state laws I can basically do what ever, we just have to have them tested at the appropriate grade levels which would be this year for him.  I have asked him what he wants to learn about and all he ever says is star wars, legos, and his newest thing robots.


We did do a lesson thing on lego's several months ago and he wasn't into it.  I agree he should be able to take charge of his learning but he doesn't seem to know how or what he wants to do.  He also has autism and ADHD and has a hard time making decsions, so I don't know if I should maybe try limiting the choices to two or three things for him to pick from to learn about and see what he does with that. 


That sounds a lot like my DS he can look at something and figure out how to build it without instructions, he is always building his own creations with legos.  He took apart one of his remote control cars to see what was inside of it and is now trying to figure out how to use the motor to make his lego robot move.  Give him a math problem and given enough time he can figure it out in his head, and he does it in a so out of the box way it is crazy! 

I never thought about the writing thing as it being stuck, as they have always said he has trouble writing.  But that would maybe make sense, because if you ask him to explain something he will try, but then gets frustrated and says he knows what he wants to say but don't know how to say it.  Yet he can type it out on a computer for the most part.     

As for the test we have to have a certified instructor give the test and grade it, we don't have to give it to anyone unless asked for it, but I can not give it or grade it myself.   The last year he was in school they said he no longer had autism and no longer qualified for any services, although I am not sure how you can outgrow autism when you have medical DX.  Thanks you have given me some more things to think about here.      

globalhorse45
by on Jan. 28, 2012 at 7:52 AM

Try science experiments, hands on learning stuff to get his attention and get him involved.  What about a co-op or field trips with other homeschoolers?  Try to cater to how he learns best (you said he does visual) so try pie charts, graphs, etc.  Make schooling fun for him and not dull repetitive work and the same thing day after day.  Try homeschooling at the park or outside in the yard if it is nice out.

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