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update, and advise/support? Especially if you unschool

Posted by on Feb. 14, 2012 at 3:38 AM
  • 3 Replies

Wow, it's amazing what a few months can make! 

So, some of you may remember I had decided to put my oldest in part time Kinder, due to some serious marital issues. So, our marriage is NOT perfect, but, things are heading in a much quieter direction. Our youngest is thriving to be home with her mama, even if she says she wants to go back to daycare when I ask her she says with a pouty lip, "no mama, you are my only bestest friend". 

So now that things maritally are quieter, we have taken notice to some things happening with our son that we hadn't noticed before. The kid is seriously stressed out! It takes him 2 hours to decompress from a 2 hour day! He has eye strain! He just had his eyes checked, and visually they are great, but he always says they hurt and he is always blinking. Also, his eating is off and he isn't drinking as much. And, he refuses to read anymore. At all. He doesn't want to build things, he is moody, and he refuses to even look at his homework packet. We were doing half day in first grade at home, but he has been so exhausted we havent even opened anything in weeks!

So, I work in his class 1 day a week, and I have noticed that they cram a ton of work on them! And, they have ds in remidial reading... when he started he read at a 2nd grade level, now he wont read kinder sight words. He's lost all confidence! Most kinder classes are play based, this is not. It's 7 minutes per activity, and you get negative marks if you don't finish. They get 15 minutes of music every week, and 20 minutes of PE. One potty break OR drink. Not both. 

So, dh and I were talking and we are thinking of pulling ds out. this will be the third change this school year. 

I know the baby is going to need deschooling till at least fall, and I just want to build his confidence back up and get him reading again. But, there is so much benefit in play! So here is the q for unschoolers, when did you figure out that your kids were ready for "hard" learning? Not just play based education. and, was there an age when you could let them work independantly? I am on the right path when I think that this is just not normal for a 6 year old, right? 

So, whats my next step? I already know my laws, and ds is going to be really sad that he can't see his friends anymore, but the poor baby is loosing the skills I decided were best for him in the future, confidence and reading!

by on Feb. 14, 2012 at 3:38 AM
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by Platinum Member on Feb. 14, 2012 at 10:16 AM

At six, there is so much he can learn through fun. Science experiments, baking for math, lots of those things can be made fun. LOL I don't know anyone that found learning high school level math fun but at 6, the things he need to know can be learned with, if not play based learning, then at least 'fun' ways.

I feel so bad for your son! I hope you guys can save his love of learning. 8(

by on Feb. 14, 2012 at 10:40 AM

 No, this is not normal for a 6y/o to be doing. I would definitely deschool until fall. Unschooling is letting the child lead the way to what they want to learn, so when he is ready for harder learning he will lead you to it.

by on Feb. 14, 2012 at 11:58 PM

Wow, that "school" sounds worse then our prison system.

With your son showing these signs you'd be a fool to continue in the direction you're going.  I have a son who blinks but good vision.  Nothing to worry about there.  Some kids are quirky and the school setting will only point out the quirkyness.  They want cookie-cutters there. 

As for the reading, if you unschooled and simply read to him some exceptional works he'd be back into it in no time.  I have 4 boys 9,8,4, and 2 so I read alot of boys books.  Be happy to give some favorites.

My eclectic/unschooling school looks more like this  .. 1-2 hrs some sort of spelling, math, writing a day.  Mind you they could easily be one.  i.e. spelling IS writing, writing IS reading, and penpals count for social studies.  Then anything else goes.  Music, art, PE and OUTSIDE!!!!!(archery, sword-fighting, legos, tear the robot apart to see how it works, find cocoons)  They're boys, you don't have to tell them twice to have fun.

 It's all how you look at it!

Good luck!

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