Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Because she's not in school now...? (Rant)

Posted by on Apr. 19, 2012 at 12:13 PM
  • 9 Replies

 Yesterday I had an appointment to see about getting some help for my daughter.  She's been having trouble grasping or retaining things. Somewhere things just get lost in translation.  Anyway, I went to the County school nearest us - because as a taxpayer, we are entitled to the services the school districts offer.  The first point they made was great - because she deals with chronic pain, that is going to be distracting to her and that needs to be under control before we worry too much about the rest.  Okay, I'm good with that.  The next 25 minutes they spent telling me how important it was to get her "back into school" and how important it is that kids "be in school" as much as possible, and how they can do that for her.  Because she's not "in school" now?  Growl...

by on Apr. 19, 2012 at 12:13 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-9):
Moma3boyz
by on Apr. 19, 2012 at 12:21 PM
Sounds like our town. The "assistance" is thru our ps even though it is not really supposed to be. They do anything they can to get kids "back in school". The school gets more money that way. They get funds for "special ed kids" and that includes kids from just in speech once a week to severely handicapped.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
snowangel1979
by Member on Apr. 19, 2012 at 12:22 PM
Of course because if she's not "in school" They don't get that money,
money,money-moonneey. (Great now I have that song stuck in my head. )

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
lucsch
by Bronze Member on Apr. 19, 2012 at 12:32 PM
1 mom liked this

I enrolled my 4yo in speech classes 5 years ago at our local school. Imagine my surprise the next fall, when I got a letter about which bus she would ride for Kindergarten! I never enrolled her, but "magically" she had been.

I do have to say that our local school was a wonderful resource for speech therapy, though. My poor girl could not pronounce any consonants when we started homeschooling for Pre-K. By the end of the year, she only had a few she could not say. Now, at age 9, she is very talkative. She still has "r" problems and sounds a bit British; but her speech is leaps and bounds above where she started.

I am thankful for the help they gave. I did have a slight run-in with the principal about homeschooling, but the speech teacher was quick to "correct" him and praise our homeschooling results. In fact, she was amazed at my dd's speech progress and said it was probably from all the one-on-one phonics work we did together at home.

Anyway, just let this type of thing roll off your back. Use their "free" services but stick up for yourself. One thing I've found as I have gotten older is that I am more willing to go against the grain and stick up for my own viewpoints.


kirbymom
by Sonja on Apr. 19, 2012 at 1:47 PM

 I couldn't agree more! 

@ Pukalani79 ~~ Always remember, the system is always going to try and get you to "come back" to them.  Hold strong, you can reach the other side. Have faith and if you're low just use some of mine. I have plenty.  lol  :)

Quoting lucsch:

 Anyway, just let this type of thing roll off your back. Use their "free" services but stick up for yourself. One thing I've found as I have gotten older is that I am more willing to go against the grain and stick up for my own viewpoints.

 

 

Pukalani79
by Kristin on Apr. 19, 2012 at 2:18 PM

 Thank you!  Our county recognizes the value of providing alternative education options.  For example: They provide a homeschool center and free curriulum to homeschooling families.  Unfortunately the staff hasn't all gotten the memo! :P  I don't know why I was surprised. It just caught me off guard I guess.

KickButtMama
by Shannon on Apr. 19, 2012 at 2:32 PM
Ugh, and how would being in such a restricted setting help w/ her pain? I have chronic pain, i can tell you from personal experience that when my pain levels are high i simply can NOT take stimulation. It's like, when my nerves are busy being all ow-ow-ow they simply can't process or understand sights, or sounds. I can turn into a short-tempered bit**, just because i can't even process a hug....so how would being in the uncorfortable chairs, surrounded by unpredictable stimuli, be of help to her? IDIOTS!

I can also tell you, she is probably absorbing much more than you think. She might not be able to regurgitate the information because of her discomfort. I agree that until the pain is managed and until she learns self-regulation (meditation is great) she's going to have a hard time expressing what she understands.
Pukalani79
by Kristin on Apr. 19, 2012 at 2:40 PM

 

Quoting KickButtMama:

I can also tell you, she is probably absorbing much more than you think. She might not be able to regurgitate the information because of her discomfort. I agree that until the pain is managed and until she learns self-regulation (meditation is great) she's going to have a hard time expressing what she understands.

 This makes a lot of sense.  With her, I'm not nearly as strict on sitting down and doing her work because she just can't focus sometimes.  We have been doing more of an "unschooling" approach but I was worried that maybe she wasn't where she needed to be.  But...she is going to do what she can do and I know that.  Just have to keep looking for that which works.

We're meeting with the doctor from the children's hospital again next month to discuss some more long term idea for managing the pain.  Hopefully he'll have some ideas for her.

Thanks for all the thoughts!

happinessforyou
by on Apr. 19, 2012 at 2:42 PM

I'm not a big fan of public schools, but I agree that: YES they have to test/help the kids in their district. By law, children have to go to school, or be homeschooled. However, they do not have to drop everything the minute a parent walks in and demands anything. They have hundreds of kids in the building on any given day, lots of those kids need services. The people who work in a school do not have a medical degree. They cannot diagnose or know the severity of these  kid's medical problems. They are concerned with her attendance because if kids miss too many days, the parents have to go to truency court. Maybe they were trying to help???

Try to be patient and handle things one at a time.  Good luck! :)

usmom3
by BJ on Apr. 19, 2012 at 3:13 PM

 I would only use them for the services if I had no other choice just because I would not be nice to them if they kept dogging on me for homeschooling!

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)