Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Do ONLY certain types of parents homeschool? What was your reason? Socializing??

Posted by on May. 31, 2012 at 4:29 PM
  • 21 Replies
I really want to homeschool but I just don't know if it's for right for us. There seems to be many stereotypes of what kind of of parents choose this option for their kids education. I joined a homeschooling group in my area to get a feel for the HS atmosphere. So far I have been very disappointed. It seems like most do it for religious reasons and I'm not into religion at all so I have zero in common with them. I have gone to the scheduled activities with my kids and while the moms are having a great time socializing with other moms, the kids are just hanging around all on their own separate ways, no socializing at all. It makes me anxious.

I want to HS because my daughter who is now in middle school has ADD and it has been a nightmare at her public school ever since kindergarten, every school day is a struggle because she needs a lot of one on one help. I'd love to be able to help her at home. She loves the idea of getting a better quality education at home but dreads missing out on her friends and so far has not liked the other kids she has met through HS groups.

We have zero family outside our little circle. No grandparents, no cousins, etc., so it would be like zero socializing.

What do you do for socializing?

What was your reason to HS?
by on May. 31, 2012 at 4:29 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
mynameismuerte
by on May. 31, 2012 at 4:42 PM
2 moms liked this
We HS because It is the best fit for my son's needs. (That's the short version lol)

My initial reaction is that there is no reason she can't still be friends with her schoolmates. Socialization would just happen on weekends and when they're not in school.

I also want to point out that "having friends" is not the definition of socialization. She could look for volunteer opportunities as well.

I too have found it a little difficult finding a HS group that is not "extreme" in their beliefs but after a LOT of searching it seems we've found something. So keep looking. Yahoo groups and meetup.com are 2 places to look.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
AmyG1976
by Member on May. 31, 2012 at 4:59 PM
3 moms liked this

 every child was homeschooled at one time there was NOT a socialization crisis lol not in the least public schools were formed as a CHEAPER why to teach.  My kids are all playing with friends right now :) We are not locked to a desk in a room with the same 25 ppl who live in our neighborehood who are the exact same age and make about the same money... They have co-op and field trips with kids from all over our town in all different age groups. they have guitar lessons swimming lessons girls scouts and 4h (we have a huge homeschool 4h but we joined the one for everyone as we dont have the time the homeschool one needs they do wayyy to much for me lol). My 2 sisters have kids one close to my kids age one NO neither live near us my sister with the way younger kids they see more but really they play with my neighbores when I watch them.  Dh family is trashy and no good think is trash mom and trash dad and a handful of looser brothers and nasty sis live nearby but we dont see them ever. except when we had foster care of one of his brothers kids before he was adopted by someone else.  There are secular homeschool groups (I am not in any religion ones). I thought same thing about the kinds of parents families ect... I was wrong lol they are normal reg cool ppl :) like me all over hehehe.   Yahoo groups is a great why to find homeschool groups in your area.  Check out places near you here we have two pools, two skating rinks, nature center, lazer tag , rock climbing, an open gym ect ect with Weekly homeschool days . going reg you would get to know others and so would your kids. I have never seen one with kids all standing alone not doing anything EVER (and I dont live in a huge homeschool area. in fact they just came crawling out of the woodwork so to say when we started)

ImmiNan
by on May. 31, 2012 at 5:42 PM
1 mom liked this

We home school our kids because we want them to have the best education possible. We want them to learn how to live in the real word and be balanced in mind, body, spirit, academically, and use their individual gifts. We want them safe, around people who love and care for them. We want to parent them and be responsible for them and accountable to them. They learn more in 1 day than they would in a week of ps, and can pursue their interests in learning. Our adopted 2 year old is learning to make words, she knows all her letters and the sounds they make. She works happily in her preschool workbooks. She sings songs, is learning the piano keys, can use a mouse on her computer as good as anyone, knows main shapes and colors. and is beginning to write letters. She is beginning addition. She paints daily and creates play food with play dough. She makes words with puzzle cards. She know the difference in living and nonliving things, and plants seeds, waters them and watches them grow. She learns science. She goes to the pond and learns about pond life and life cycles. She peddles her tricycle, remembers her helmet, and swims every sunny hot day. We go on field trips. Well, surely this is enough of an example to show that home can be the greatest place to learn. Our other children began the same way. Their vocabulary is as good as most adults and their lifestyle is continual education.

themodestgal
by on May. 31, 2012 at 5:44 PM
1 mom liked this
Thanks moms. I get so nervous to cross over the line and homeschool, but it seems to be the best choice for their future.
oredeb
by debbie on May. 31, 2012 at 5:56 PM

 hi them, we started homeschooling cuz i didnt want my kids to be bullied, so i started from the very beginning and to the end(they are all graduated) now im helping out other families, teaching their kids

socializing was no big deal back then like it is today, never even thought about it! they turned out fine!hahahaha

round here theres all types of groups for homeschoolers, the one i use to belong to was a mix of different backgrounds, we all got along fine, the kids played together, we had fun together

usmom3
by BJ on May. 31, 2012 at 6:03 PM
1 mom liked this

The kids have joined groups or classes over the years & made friends that way! We also do a lot of the free activities offered through the library! As far as extended family we don't have any that live close that we want to spend a ton of time with so we may only see them once or twice a year, if at all.

Our original reason for HS was our oldest has Autism & the PS was more harm then good for him! We continue to HS because I don't believe any real learning happens in the PS only grooming & conditioning for obedient government drones!

We are Christians but we don't go to church or preach the bible. We listen to all kinds of music from classical all the way to modern. We are gamers & love to play video games as a family. If you saw us out in town you would never guess we homeschooled our kids just by looking at us! I know a lot of families that are just as different from us as they are from the stereotype, so never think you can't homeschool based off of a type of personality or lifestyle!

NYCitymomx3
by Bronze Member on May. 31, 2012 at 6:54 PM
1 mom liked this

Definitely not the norm around here.  I belong to several very active homeschool groups and they are all secular.  I'm sure there are religious-based homeschoolers in the groups, but it has nothing do with why we all get together a few times a week.  My ds is 11 and we now spend the most time with a group that is made up of almost all middle-school aged kids.  They have a great time together, not obly during our field tripa and classes, but in the hours afterward when we have lunch and hit the playgrounds.

I suggest you find other groups.  If you can't, then get your dd into some extracurricular, like dance, gymnastics, karate, soccer, etc, so she'll have something more in common with the kids.  

kirbymom
by Sonja on May. 31, 2012 at 8:02 PM

These are the very reasons why we homeschool our kids.

Quoting ImmiNan:

We home school our kids because we want them to have the best education possible. We want them to learn how to live in the real word and be balanced in mind, body, spirit, academically, and use their individual gifts. We want them safe, around people who love and care for them. We want to parent them and be responsible for them and accountable to them. They learn more in 1 day than they would in a week of ps, and can pursue their interests in learning.

 

Danielle163
by on May. 31, 2012 at 8:23 PM

 I can really relate to what you're talking about. We are secular homeschoolers (no religion in our studies and I'm not into religion either--BUT we study it in World Religions class) and it makes it very difficult. We are in the Midwest and we hardly see any other homeschoolers.......EVER. The majority (I'd say as high as 95%) of the homeschoolers here homeschool due to religion. The other 5% must be hermits or something.

I think there are stereotypes about people that homeschool, but I don't care what other people think about me/my family. I am very far from what is considered the norm for a homeschooling mom. My DD was removed from ps in 1st grade due to bullying/social problems.

We live in a very small town where, unfortunately, we have a very high percentage of bullies, children and adults. The activities here are few and far between. We have no co-ops, no homeschool support groups (I've tried three different times to start one), and the homeschool coordinator is of no help as he looks down his nose at homeschooling. Whatever. My DD goes to Awanna with DH ( he enjoys it), is in 4H, and she is considering rejoining Girl Scouts. The troop was overrun with mean girls, so we are still mulling this one over.

Since your DD is receptive to being hs, I would just keep trying to meet new kids. Possibly, see if she can get together with some of her friends from ps. If they are true friends, they won't slam on homeschooling. We keep hoping that eventually we will encounter other homeschoolers that we have something in common with. We just ran into some girls from public school at the park. All they wanted to do was put homeschooling down. DD said she didn't want to see them again. It can be tough in a small town.

Oh, and I forgot to add.....even though my DD was removed due to bullying, I now know the benefits of homeschooling. My DD is getting a far superior education and she doesn't have to deal with all of the bull sh*t at the public school.

LilyMe
by on May. 31, 2012 at 8:33 PM

We are Christian, but I rarely talk about our faith with our other home-schooling friends.  It's not really something that comes up.  I do know that most of them are far more conservative than I am.  Our religion is definitley not why we home-school, and my kids will learn about dinosaurs and evolution.

We are home-schooling for various reasons.  I actually did very well in school, got an academic scholarship to an Ivy League, and then really struggled in college because I never learned to study.  My husband was the opposite- barely graduated, went to the Navy, and his post-service life is RIFE with examples of his intelligence.  For various different reasons, public school didn't serve us well.  So we think it won't fit our children, either.

Another reason- my husband owns his own business and travels a lot.  Vacations don't happen unless the kids and I go with him on his work travels.  Because we're blessed enough to be able to afford it, we just want to spend as much time traveling and exploring real life while our kids are still, well, kids.  One thing my hubby says a lot is "No one ever looked back at their life and says ''I wish I'd started working sooner.  That childhood fun was such a waste!"  We want our kids to get to be kids, and I feel like the forced, restrictive and suffocating environment of school, public or private, really robs our kids of that special time..

As for socialization- well, to be honest, socialization is exactly why we don't want to be in the public schools.  My kids take dance classes, play on sports teams, join clubs, do group things at church, make friends around the nieghborhood, the park, on field trips...  I think their socialization is healthy as 1) they get to pick who they spend their time with rather than just be put in a room with kids who share the same birth year as they do and live in the same district and 2) there is much more adult over-sight and input.  Not helicopter parenting, but I can assure you that the kind of bullying you see in schools will not have the time to take root in home-school environment.  The kids just aren't together in big enough chunks to exploit that stuff.   I've also found that homeschooled kids are more comfortable around kids and adults that are different age groups than they are, and they value their time with other kids and not resent or squander it.

Making friends takes time, especially for girls in middle school.  If you decide to do this, hang in there, and just love on her as much as you can.

Lily Me (Elizabeth) teacherreading

Musings 

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)