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Did your child have any input when it came to homeschooling?

Posted by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 10:13 AM
  • 33 Replies

Hi all. I just joined the group, because I am thinking about homeschooling. My daughter is already five, but she has a late birthday, so she'll started k5 when she is almost six. I've thought about homeschooling off and on, and had decided maybe I would try it (sort of, an online academy with supplemental lessons and stuff from me). My daughter seemed okay with the idea at first, but then changed her mind. She said she wants to go to school with other kids. 

I can tell she gets lonely. I'm an okay playmate I guess, but she longs to be around other kids. I try to take her places where she can interact with children and we have lots of cousins she plays with...but I guess it hasn't been enough so far. 

I'm still interested in homeschooling, but not if it makes her miserable to know what she's missing out on. I try to explain to her that school is 99% work and only 1% the playground she seems to think is so cool. I said now that she's old enough she could do soccer, basketball, and we'd join some groups in the next town over (my town isn't the tiniest, but there were almost no groups that I could find...maybe I'm looking in the wrong places?)

So far we've leaned toward public school, even though something in me tells me to look at homeschooling again. I don't know what it is yet. Maybe I just don't want my baby to leave. If that's the reason, I don't think that's a good enough reason to keep her home, since it's going to be a lot of work. But I think I need to do some more reading and soul searching, and I'm running out of time. Enrollment here is in a few more months. 

That's my story so far. lol. I guess my questions are:

How did you make the decision to homeschool?

Did your child have a say in the matter, or did you do what you thought best regardless?

Where do you find the much needed social interactions? I'm thinking we'd need to get her somewhere with kids at least a few days a week for her to be happy, and maybe even daily trips to the park or something aside from that. 

I write stuff.

by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 10:13 AM
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by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 10:32 AM
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 welcome erin, yes a big decision you've got to make! homeschooling is worth it! my kids loved it, and they are all normal adults with spouses and jobs!

i made the decision when i was 13, i never heard of hsing but i knew i was never gona send any kids i had to a school! to many bullies! and when i had kids and it was time i homeschooled them all the way

nope the kids had no say in the matter, im the parent, i make the big life concerning decisions,

we joined groups, did some swimming, gymnastics, made friends with other hsers and the kids around  us, they never had a problem with socialization!


by Platinum Member on Dec. 5, 2012 at 11:26 AM
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We are public school refugees. LOL I pulled my daughter (now in 6th grade) out after first grade. Unlike many families it wasn't for bullying, but more because I felt she wasn't learning enough, on top of the fact that her school was filled with bad influences that she was picking up. I'm not talking about her hearing about iCarly or something. I'm talking about me chaperoning field trips and seeing kids throwing fits like toddlers and hearing a ton of cuss words. It was a surprise since we live in a fairly nice suburb. YIKES! After two years of seeing this and no improvements, we decided to pull her out.

One of the plus sides to this is that she sees my hubby way more than she would if she was in school since for the longest time, he worked second shift. Now, we all live and work in one cohesive family unit which is awesome.

No, the kids don't have a choice about school. As their parent, I take their wants into consideration but will do what I think is best for the family. Will you send her to school only to pull her out when she says she doesn't like waking up early? Or that she doesn't like Suzy and doesn't feel like going today? It is basically the same idea with not giving them a choice to not homeschool. There are tons of groups and playgroups, co opts and classes she can do for socialization. Take the idea that she can choose from her and you won't hear anything about wanting to go to school after a few months. Take this first year to show her how fun homeschooling is going to be. By next year when she is old enough for PS, she will be used to the idea of not going and having fun at home with you. 8)

by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 11:35 AM
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She's 15 and has input on how we do it, but not THAT we do it. At least not this year. Depending on how it goes, she may have input next year, but we'll cross that bridge when we get there.

by Gold Member on Dec. 5, 2012 at 11:42 AM
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We made the decision.  I don't care what they have to say about going to school.  My kids are well rounded.  They get out of the house a few days a week.  We try to get to the park once a week, go skating ALL day Saturday (they have so many friends at the local rink that I cant keep track of them for most of the day.  BTW our local roller rink is an establishment where I feel that I can turn my kids free and know that they are OK.  The staff and the regular parents know which kids belong to the parents.  My girls are home educated b/c I feel it is the best thing for them.  If I feel I need there input then I am not doing my job as a parent in this area.

by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 11:45 AM
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I guess I am also worried about my teaching capabilities. I am not the most patient person. At all. I teach her things, and she usually catches on fast, but when she doesn't... I start getting antsy. 

My main reasons for considering it are because I don't think I learned as much as I could have in public school due to all the regulations teachers have to follow... and they spent more time correcting kids who were out of line than they did teaching. They had no choice. Kids were crazy. This resulting in them going over and over and over the same things a million times, my mind would wander, and then class was over. 

I also want them to learn to figure some things out for themselves. I agree with having a curriculum and rules and all that, but I think some things are better learned through discovering them with hands on activities. And there are a lot of things I think schools should, but can't, get more in depth about. Actual life skills that are part of the curriculum, but not really delved into. Like health. 

But... I have two other kids and a home based business. Can I really manage it all? I guess I am mainly scared, tired, and afraid I will fall on my face because I already have trouble with focusing on things. 

by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 12:06 PM

 erin if you really want to do it you will, you'll find a way to make it work! when i first started i didnt have many patience either! but i learned to have them! lots of them!

Quoting ErinHill226:

I guess I am also worried about my teaching capabilities. I am not the most patient person. At all. I teach her things, and she usually catches on fast, but when she doesn't... I start getting antsy. 



But... I have two other kids and a home based business. Can I really manage it all? I guess I am mainly scared, tired, and afraid I will fall on my face because I already have trouble with focusing on things. 


by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 12:22 PM

Hi Erin,

I commend you for being so honest with your feelings....homeschooling is a big decision. 

To answer your questions, I decided to homeschool when my baby was in my womb.  It is sort of ironic, because I was a public school teacher, but when we had our son I resigned to be a stay-at-home mom with him.  Now my son is 4 and I have a 7-month old daughter.  Through homeschooling, we have grown closer, and I have seen him learn SO is a wonderful feeling to know I helped him with that. 

This year, I am making homeschool as fun as I can, so that he falls in love with it.  And so far, he does!  He tells me he loves it.  So when he sees a school bus go by, or asks about cousins who attend public school, I tell him that we are going to do homeschool and do our learning at home.  So far, he seems ok with that.  Perhaps you could start homeschooling some this year, so your daughter can see how fun and rewarding it is to learn at home.  There are so many fun lessons you can do! 

As for the socialization, it takes a little more effort at first, but not hard to do.  We belong to a playgroup of mommies in the local area, that helps a lot.  We also enroll him in youth sports programs to see what he likes.  He did soccer in the fall, and is now doing bowling.  We also attend a weekly storytime program at our library, community events, visit playgrounds often, and get together with friends and family with kids.  I have now found that there is so much to do out there, that I have to pick and choose what we will do.   You could start by looking on the internet.  There is a site called where you can find local mom groups. 

Also, we are going to start attending a homeschool co-op once a week next year, when my son is in kindergarten.  I want my son to have a group of friends he can see on a regular basis, and I feel that the co-op will greatly help in fulfilling that need. 

I would also suggest a book for you called So you're thinking about homeschooling : fifteen families show how you can do it! / by Lisa Whelchel.   Your library probably has a wealth of other books about homeschooling you could read. 

And finally, don't be discouraged if you get a lot of slack and opposition from the majority of people (especially the ones who have no experience with homeschooling and don't even know anyone who homeschools).  The general view in society is negative toward homeschooling, but if you do your homework (reading and talking with other homeschoolers), I think you will find how many benefits there are. 

by Silver Member on Dec. 5, 2012 at 12:36 PM

I know it's not popular on this board, but yes, our children have a say in homeschool... so long as there is no pressing issue to homeschool. By "pressing issue" I mean so long as the other option (in our choice, not public; we would send them back to Catholic school) can offer the level of academics we are after and so long as there are no safety concerns in sending them there.

Our daughter (grade 6, age 11) has the option of going back to school next year. We started homeschooling her a few years ago. She decided to stay home again. We homeschool year by year. I will start out homeschooling the younger boys, and if they ever decide they want to go to school, it will be a school of our choice, but they too will have input in that decision.

Some will compare it to making a child eat their vegetables - it's something you make them do because you know it's best for them, regardless of their personal taste. I'm not fond of the comparison. Vegetables are good for most children; different educational environments work well for different children - unlike veggies, there is no one size fits all. For some children homeschool is great, for others brick and mortar schools works just as well (if not better).

For social outlets we are involved in a homeschool co-op that meets every other week for both social interaction and academics, our daughter also takes ballet at a reputable studio, and has friends in the neighborhood that she sees/plays with almost daily. Next year our daughter will also have the option of participating in the local public school's interscholastic activities (sports, clubs, etc); it is something new our district allows.

I am a Home Schooling, Vaccinating, Non spanking, Nightmare Cuddling, Dessert Giving, Bedtime Kissing, Book Reading, Stay at Home Mom. I believe in the benefit of organized after school activities and nosy, involved parents. I believe in spoiling my children. I believe that I have seen the village and I do not want it anywhere near my children. Now for the controversial stuff: we have traditional gender roles, we're Catholic, I'm Libertarian, he's Republican, we're both conservative, and we own guns (now there's no need to ask, lol).             Aimee

by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 12:37 PM
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I think my own fears are part of what is holding me back. If I'm honest...the main part. I know that she shouldn't get a say in her education at five years old. That would be silly. But it's easier to say "oh well, she doesn't wanna" than to try and fail at fitting everything in. She seems to do well learning on her own, much like I do. So maybe it won't be as hard as I think. She could do her work while I do mine? Once I've explained things and such? Maybe? Wishful thinking? lol. 

Plus, we want more kids. So I wonder if homeschooling will mean I have to keep it at three, since homeschooling 4+ kids sounds awfully scary. 

As for opposition. I am used to that. If you name an unconventional parenting decision, I've probably made it. lol. The people in my circle who matter think the same way as me, or they are at least respectful of new ideas. Anybody else, I don't really care what they think. My primary concerns are losing my cool with her when she doesn't catch on "fast enough" and stretching myself too thin. I feel like wanting a business is selfish, but I've spent five years building a client base, and I love what I do. 

I guess trying it for a year couldn't hurt. If I find that we're miserable, I can figure out where to go from there. 

by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 12:59 PM
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i don't believe anyone under the age of 16 gets a say in their education, that's my job as parent. Plus, a 5 y/o has zero idea of what the reality of school would be like. My kids lived under the misimpression that PS meant riding the bus to the playground every, I do make sure we have plenty of out of home activities, like our co-op, so they can make friends.

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