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Ready to give up

Posted by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 12:08 PM
  • 12 Replies

Currently I work full time and my husband stays home with the 3 kids. They are homeschooled and in 1st, 3rd, and 4th grade. He would teach during the day and then nights I would follow up with more detail and answer questions. Lately though I have been getting out of work late because of tax season and haven't been able to sit with them. To make things worse my hubby is going through a bit of depression, that no matter what I do, he won't come out of it. And of course he refuses to see a doctor. Well because of this he hasn't even been doing school with the kids. They still haven't finished December's school work. I feel like I am short changing their education. I am ready to give up and put them in school. They are smart kids but I am fearful they won't fit in at a normal public school. Especially my son with his ADHD. So I have started looking into Charter schools. I can't afford a private school.

Ladies, in your opinion, do I give up and put them in school or try and find a way to get homeschool working for us again? Any suggestions would be great. I feel extremely lost. And I hate the idea of leaving their education up to a stranger.



by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 12:08 PM
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by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 12:57 PM

 I don't like the PS & I feel that no school is better then PS (but that is my personal opinion) that being said you could do online PS instead of sending them to the brick & mortar schools. Or you could try a different homeschooling style all together like child led learning or unschooling.

Children (actually all humans) learn even if they aren't taught, we are hard wired to learn & if the love for learning hasn't been destroyed then there will always be an internal drive to learn something.

by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 1:36 PM
What about K12 for awhile? Or even Time4Learning?
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by Silver Member on Jan. 24, 2013 at 1:59 PM

I have nothing against public schools.

If your husband isn't up for it, and you don't have time for it, I vote that you do indeed enroll them.

I am a Home Schooling, Vaccinating, Non spanking, Nightmare Cuddling, Dessert Giving, Bedtime Kissing, Book Reading, Stay at Home Mom. I believe in the benefit of organized after school activities and nosy, involved parents. I believe in spoiling my children. I believe that I have seen the village and I do not want it anywhere near my children. Now for the controversial stuff: we have traditional gender roles, we're Catholic, I'm Libertarian, he's Republican, we're both conservative, and we own guns (now there's no need to ask, lol).             Aimee

by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 2:11 PM
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I wouldn't give up yet.  You still have some options.  I would consider and library visits for a time to get over this hump.  Your 3rd and 4th graders can do a lot of their work independently.  Good luck!  :)

by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 4:00 PM

Thank you for the suggestions.

I have never used How does it work?

by Sonja on Jan. 24, 2013 at 4:46 PM
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Hi Desire.  :)  

I will answer your question first, with a question to you.....

Do you know what the BEST thing about homeschooling is?  

The best thing about homeschooling is that you can do WHATEVER you want, WHENEVER you want, HOWEVER you want to suit the needs of the family. If you need to take a day, a week, or even a month off, you can. You do whatever suits the family. Period. You do NOT have to school like anyone else. That especially includes the public school system.  Your children will not come to any intellectual harm by taking sometime off. And besides, if you are doing some things then all is not stopped. Something is better than nothing but sometimes nothing is all you can give for a time. 

So STOP feeling so darned guilty and feeling like a bad mother! You are NOT a bad mother. I promise. And you have NOTHING to feel guilty about. That I promise as well.  

As for picking up a slight slack, just do a little something when you can if hubby isn't able. You can also do some schooling on the weekends if need be. You can assign them independent work. Use the library as a check/answer system or use the Internet to find answers to the lessons you give them. I have done both when needed.   If you have a printer or can buy one cheaply enough, print out lessons with the answers attached.  Just do some basics for now and try to focus on helping your hubby get back on track. Have your kids help with this if that is possible. If you are of a faith, then pray.  I believe in prayer and I also believe that God never lays on us any more than we can bare. So if you feel like you are under a tremendous load, then that means that God believes that you are much stronger than you yourself believe. What doesn't kill us, WILL make us stronger!  

So, think and then think again. Make sure that you make your decision based on what is concretely needed for everyone rather than a feeling of failure that is based on circumstantial evidence. 

Good Luck sweety. We are all here pulling for you. No matter what decision you make.  :) 

by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 4:49 PM

My kids will fall behind this month because we will be moving and I have to leave first, however we have already discussed that once we move we will be working 7 days a week until we catch up on their work. They have agreed to it. Ds is in 6th with severe ADHD and high functioning autism. Dd is in 4th with no special needs. Both love to learn. 

by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 5:18 PM

 maybe gettin your husband to see that he needs help would solve some things, anyone you can talk to about it? does he realise that you might be putting them back into school ps??

by on Jan. 30, 2013 at 2:39 PM

Thank you so very much for the advise. We went to an open house that the Charter school near us had. And OH MY!!! What was I thinking... I can't do it. We are going to work more on weekends to get caught up. And then talking with the kids, we have agreed to try a different method for school next year. One where my 3rd and 4th grader can work more independently.

P.S. Unfortunately the hubby didn't seem to care that I was going to put them in public school. So the kids and I will figure this out on our own.



by on Jan. 30, 2013 at 2:42 PM

most people go to public school...there education will be fine..most teachers care ..sounds like your hubby may need a little social life...

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