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The concept of time (special needs kiddos)....

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My son is 10 and has NO concept of time.  He understands it just fine on a worksheet.  He clearly understands there are 7 days/ week, 24 hours in a day, and can tell time just fine on a clock.  But he has NO idea how those numbers relate to his life.  Lets say we have a play date Friday at 3, he dosen't understand what that really means.  He honestly thinks he can change time.  So if he wants the play day to come quickly he will just change the calendar and time.  We've tried counting down the days on a calendar.  I've tried making "appointments" ( we're going to take a walk at 2 pm) but nothing seems to work.  

This is our conversation this morning

Collin:  When is Anne going to get here?!!

Me:  Anne isn't coming today, she's coming next week.

Collin:  (Screaming/yelling)  She IS coming today.

Me: No she's coming next week, today is Wednesday, we can see her in 7 days.  

Collin: kicking and screaming, (now sitting on his quiet chair) 


Not sure if its an autism/maturity thing.  It just seems like he will  NEVER get the concept.  It's very frustrating.  Anyone else deal with this?  Any ideas or suggestions?  

by on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:35 AM
Replies (11-20):
mommy4lyf
by on Jun. 26, 2013 at 1:11 PM
You are very right. Our kids don't follow the milestones they follow their own. This stage will just pass = )


Quoting irvinehiker:

Thats a possibility.  He has sensory issues and gets over stimulated VERY easily.  So an hourly alarm would drive us all crazy, but maybe 3 to 4 times throughout the day to start out.  I think with him its a maturity thing.  The whole issue will probaly work its way out over time.  It's just going to take a REALLY LONG time.

Quoting mommy4lyf:


Have you tried using an alarm clock that goes off every hour or on certain time? my son is not very good with theory without application. He learns pretty much by concrete example. You will find a way... we always do lol... we had the same issue before. My son thought that he can have his birthday anytime of the year.


Quoting irvinehiker:

I've tried a calendar.  If he wants a certain day to come quicker, he just crosses off the days.  Like I said, he honestly thinks he can change time.  Christmas was insane.  We had to make about 10 countdown calendars lol (non of which worked to teach him the concept).

Quoting mommy4lyf:

I use wall calendar just for him. He crossed out everyday. I write his appointments in colored markers so he knows. He likes to count days before vacations lol







smalltownmom03
by Member on Jun. 26, 2013 at 1:12 PM



Quoting bluerooffarm:

 We count our days in "wake ups."  It still poses some problems, like let's take a nap so we can wake up extra times.  But it's the best I came up with.

IE we have 4 more wake ups until we leave for camp.

This makes me think of the way old movies show native americans telling time. They counted their days by the moons. So if something was happening in three days it would be 2 moons. 


bluerooffarm
by Gold Member on Jun. 26, 2013 at 1:17 PM
1 mom liked this

 

Quoting smalltownmom03:

 

 

Quoting bluerooffarm:

 We count our days in "wake ups."  It still poses some problems, like let's take a nap so we can wake up extra times.  But it's the best I came up with.

IE we have 4 more wake ups until we leave for camp.

This makes me think of the way old movies show native americans telling time. They counted their days by the moons. So if something was happening in three days it would be 2 moons. 

 

 Well, it totally makes sense to count on something more concrete.  I've lived out in the middle of nowhere long enough to lose track of days.  It was much easier in my mind to think my hubby will be back after 3 more nights because I would not remember if today was Tuesday or Wednesday.  LOL

usmom3
by BJ on Jun. 26, 2013 at 10:22 PM
Yep we have dealt with that. What I do is stay as calm as I can & explain with the aid of a calendar & I will go over it as many times as I need to until he can understand.
irvinehiker
by Andrea on Jun. 27, 2013 at 11:39 PM

Thanks ladies for all your ideas!!

Bluecalm
by Bronze Member on Jun. 27, 2013 at 11:46 PM
For my 6 year old, everything is today, tomorrow, or yesterday. Yesterday could be two years ago. His speech therapist works on this with him. I use a calendar. We don't X out, we just circle the day it will happen and he can count forward. We talk about it alot and I try to give him practice and new vocabulary to use.
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wowguildmomma
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 11:47 PM

I wish i could help but ours are obsessed with the clock and calandar, if we tell them that we have to be somewhere by a certain time we have to ensure that a we are very prompt and arriveing early isn't even acceptable, or put tape over the clock in the car to hide it cause if we try to be even a min early or late the meltdowns as if the world is coming to an end start and with 4 of them its almost more than can be handled.

irvinehiker
by Andrea on Jun. 27, 2013 at 11:55 PM

For Collin everything is "next year."  Next year and next week are somehow the same thing in his mind even though he knows there are 365 days in a year and 7 days in a week.  "Mom can we go get ice cream next year?"  "yes, probaly at some point next year we will get some ice cream. "  lol.  I'm going to try a calendar again and just work on  it daily.

Quoting Bluecalm:

For my 6 year old, everything is today, tomorrow, or yesterday. Yesterday could be two years ago. His speech therapist works on this with him. I use a calendar. We don't X out, we just circle the day it will happen and he can count forward. We talk about it alot and I try to give him practice and new vocabulary to use.


Bluecalm
by Bronze Member on Jun. 28, 2013 at 12:08 AM
1 mom liked this
My son had a hard time earlier this month understanding that VBS was over and wouldn't happen again for a year. He turned 6 that week, so I told him he would be turning 7 when it started again. Monday he bounced out of bed and asked if he was 7 now.


Quoting irvinehiker:

For Collin everything is "next year."  Next year and next week are somehow the same thing in his mind even though he knows there are 365 days in a year and 7 days in a week.  "Mom can we go get ice cream next year?"  "yes, probaly at some point next year we will get some ice cream. "  lol.  I'm going to try a calendar again and just work on  it daily.

Quoting Bluecalm:

For my 6 year old, everything is today, tomorrow, or yesterday. Yesterday could be two years ago. His speech therapist works on this with him. I use a calendar. We don't X out, we just circle the day it will happen and he can count forward. We talk about it alot and I try to give him practice and new vocabulary to use.



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Mommy2Phenley
by Bronze Member on Jun. 28, 2013 at 1:40 AM
It won't help with long term time of days or weeks, but for minutes have you tried a Time Timer? We got ours on amazon. We use it many times a day. We love it! You can set it for up to 59 minutes. As you pull the timer around to set it, it makes the clock face red. As it ticks down you can actually see the time progressing by the red getting smaller. This helped dd a lot. She's gaining a much better grasp on what's meant by a given length of time.

You'd have to put it up high, so he can't make it fast forward. But you could start out really small like say "we'll have ice cream in 15 minutes" and then set it. He'll be able to see the red disappearing but will not be able to speed it up if it's out of reach.

Might help on a small scale to get the idea of not being able to manipulate time.
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