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Updated--OT: I need to vent..witout having my SO judged by people we know.

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Long story short our just turned 5 yo failed her vision screening at the pediatrician last week.  I took her to the Optometrist and had a full screening done.  She is extremely farsighted.  My gut instinct said that I should get her checked by a pediatric Opthamologist.  I made an appointment thinking that it would be a few months away.  They had a cancelation for this week, so we are going in tomorrow.

Now to my vent.  My SO doesn't think that we should get our 5 yo glasses on the basis that she may outgrow this.  I don't think she will outgrow this and it will likely get worse.

I have been paying attention to things that I didn't really "notice" before.  She is complaining of headaches, that words are "fuzzy", she can't read on my iPhone, her writting is getting worse, her phonics grades are slipping if we aren't sitting there reading the answers to her....not doing the work, but reading it to her.

We are the type of parents that both need to be on the same page before we will make a decision about something unless we are in a life threatening situation.  I would like to see her get the glasses so that she can begin to flourish again.  We are talking about a 5 yo who is reading on a 3rd grade level at this point.  She is reading a junior edition of Little Women and loving it.  It pains me as her mom to see her struggle.

Does anyone have any suggestions that I can use to help get him on board?

BTW He does have glasses, but he is nearsighted and legally blind without his glasses.

Update:  We went to our appointment today and it took about 2 1/2 hours.  Daddy went with us.  The Opthamologist told us that our DD is on the upper end of moderate Hyperopia.  He thinks that if it isn't corrected soon it could lead to a lazy eye that won't be easily correctable the older she gets.  He says that she does accomodate pretty well now, but could certainly use the glasses.  Daddy is really considering this and I am going to do a little more digging to help my case.

I really don't want anyone thinking that he is this horrible person because he isn't.  We butt heads occasionally when it comes to the kids, but when it happens we are both trying to do what is in the best interest of our children.  We love them both dearly.

Thank you for ALL the support and encouragement!!!!

by on Jul. 15, 2013 at 3:21 PM
Replies (21-26):
by Silver Member on Jul. 16, 2013 at 9:38 AM


I had to get glasses when I was in 2nd grade, and yes my eyes have gotten worse, but it wasn't because the muscles got lazy...I'm just screwed genetically in the vision department. The opthamologist and optomotrist would both be able to tell you if she could "out grow" the need for glasses.
In my experience, if I get a headache that won't go away for more than a week, I know I need to get my perscription changed. It's always been like that. And if she's squinting to try and focus her eyes so she can see things, she's actually hurting herself more, and it's usually a good sign that this isn't something that can be grown out of.

by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 9:55 AM
2 moms liked this
As someone who needs glasses and needed glasses as a child but who's parents wouldn't get her any please, please get her glasses.
by Gold Member on Jul. 16, 2013 at 10:51 AM

I like the way you think!!!  We have both done the research in many other areas.  I seem to be the only one who did the research with this.  LOL  I will have to use that one with him.

Quoting MommyO2-6631:

Take him to the appointment with you. They told my mom that if my sister didn't wear her glasses her eyes would continuously get worse because of the struggle her eyes would be under. We have a rule.... you get a say as long as you do the research. If you don't want to do the research then you get no say. This goes for education, vaccines, extracurriculars, everything.

by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 12:41 PM

 If your child outgrows this, the yearly eye exam will show this and she can quit wearing glasses.  Until then, I would definitely get her glasses.  Would he go without his glasses on the basis that his vision might improve or his eyes get lazy?  If not, then he should be willing to do the same for his daughter as he would for himself.

by on Jul. 16, 2013 at 12:45 PM
I don't know if this helps, but when my son was in Pre-K, his teacher basically told me that he would most likely have to repeat K because he was just not capable of keeping up with his classmates (he would repeat K because the school district he was in at the time DID NOT have children repeat Pre-K except in one case, not my son, which took a massive lawsuit). I had always been concerned about my children's vision, as I have hereditary vision problems. That summer we took my son to the Opthamologist, she said he indeed needed glasses, but they could possibly wait. I got them anyway because I had suffered as a child until my vision issues were treated and didn't want my kiddos to go through that. Anyway, long story short, when he went back to school, suddenly he became the best reader in the class, had the highest scores, and generally left the rest of the class behind in pretty much everything. I would say don't wait to get the glasses, do it now. If she can't see, she won't be able to read (and it sounds like she loves it now) and you will run the risk of her losing her passion for it.
by Bronze Member on Jul. 16, 2013 at 2:34 PM

 This was my thought

Quoting usmom3:

 I would have him go with you to that Dr. appointment & have the Dr. tell him how this will not get better. For me this would be a nonnegotiable thing if her eyes are bad she needs glasses & the chance of it getting better are higher if she has them then if she doesn't have them.


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