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OT & Just For Fun: 25 Fake Swears Parents Use in Front of the Kids

Posted by on Aug. 19, 2013 at 12:01 PM
  • 4 Replies
1 mom liked this

25 Fake Swears Parents Use in Front of the Kids

by Jeanne Sager


little girlThe first time my daughter dropped something and said "fudge ripple ice cream," I breathed a huge sigh of relief. She wasn't asking for a sweet treat. She was copying me, specifically copying my go-to "curse" word.

Yes, occasionally I curse in front of my kid. But I try not to do it very often, and so I've got some "fake" curses up my sleeve, words I use in place of the really bad four-letter words that I want to say ... but shouldn't.

Fudge ripple ice cream, in case you haven't guessed, is what comes out of my mouth when I want to drop an F-bomb. It gets the job done, but I'll admit it's pretty comical, even a tad bit ridiculous

But if you think that's bad, just wait until you hear some of the crazy things parents say just to avoid using bad words in front of their kids!

More from The Stir: 16 of the Craziest Things Perfectly Normal Parents Have Said

Parents 'fessed up to all of the following:

1. Oh Buzzard Soups!

2. Zip it, Happy Meal! (stolen from Despicable Me)

3. Schmaltz (s**t),

4. Fudge graham (f**k)

5. Holy guacamole

6. My brother likes to yell "son of a BEAVER!" when he needs to swear and his kids are around. I like it because it still sounds dirty.

7. I curse in front of [my kids] but on the occasion I remember in front of other people's kids, I use "oh, sugar snaps!"

8. [My daughter] came up with "jingledarnit" as an alternative to swearing when we talked about it.

9. Shut the front door!

10. Flipping (in place of the other F-bomb).

Swear Words for Parents11. Razzle-frazzit! (Came from an old Looney Tunes)

12. I say, "Oh coconuts," though I think I stole that from Jake and the Neverland Pirates.

13. I am always yelling "GARBAGE!" It takes the place of many words I want to use...

14. I used to say, "Oh crap" all the time. Not exactly the worst curse word, but one day as I was about to scream it I noticed my 4-year-old looking right at me, so, "Oh crumbcake" came out and it stuck!

15. Sugar pie (in place of sh*t).

16. Nuckin futs!

17. Flip flop for f**k

18. Oh mustard for oh sh*t

19. Hockey Sticks (for Hell)

20. Ish (for sh*t)

21. Fanabala (f**k)

22. My mom says "oh fart" instead of the f word.

23. Friggers (for f**ers)

24. Fudge ripple ice cream

25. Frick (for f**k)

What are your go-to fake curse words?

by on Aug. 19, 2013 at 12:01 PM
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SusanTheWriter
by on Aug. 19, 2013 at 12:20 PM
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I noticed that my kids had picked up my habit of saying "Oh crap!" When I heard it from them, I realized that it didn't sound much better than if they were dropping f-bombs all over the place.

So we brainstormed together and decided that I was right and "crap" didn't sound nice, and instead we were going to say ... Cheese doodles! Because no matter what just happened that made you say "Oh crap!" yelling out "Cheese doodles!" instead was bound to make you feel better. :)

It's frequently modified to Cheezits, cheese nuggets, cheesy darn doodlits, or anything else that pops out. *gg*

usmom3
by BJ on Aug. 19, 2013 at 12:58 PM
1 mom liked this

 My Mom made up her own cuss words & it just made us kids laugh at her because we would hear our Dad use the real things.

My youngest son is not happy that he can not use adult curse words so we did some research on curse words that have stopped being used & he is allowed to say them. Here is LINK1 LINK2 of what we found.

bluerooffarm
by Gold Member on Aug. 19, 2013 at 3:40 PM
1 mom liked this

 Frapdoodle (from Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium)

My hubby says "I'm ready to smack your Aspen tree."  When he's nearly at the point of a spanking.

kirbymom
by Sonja on Aug. 19, 2013 at 4:11 PM
OMG!!!!
Ahahahaha
Rollin in the floor here!
LOL. :)
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