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what do you do when your kids are uncooperative? **edit**

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for the past 2 days, both kids are being difficult...neither wants to "do school" and i'm spending  a lot of time telling them "come back here...what are you doing?  we're not finished".  this is new and i'm not sure how to handle it.

ideas?

**edit**....for whatever reason, both kids were amazing students today.  not only were they attentive and focused, but they didn't want to take breaks and made up all the missed work from the past 2 days.  

i think brownies were the key, lol.  i actually had to make brownies for a girl scout ceremony last night and we had a lot left over.  they both wanted brownies this morning, so i told them it was okay.  sugar rush?  probably -- but it worked like a charm!!

by on Aug. 21, 2013 at 11:17 AM
Replies (21-30):
AmyMamie
by Member on Aug. 21, 2013 at 6:10 PM
2 moms liked this

My kindergartener is EXACTLY like yours, and one thing that has helped (during this first short week of school, lol) is the bouncy ball chair from Timberdoodle (I remember that you're a fan of that website also).  So any time he starts in on "I want to be done - I'm bored", I get out that bouncy seat and let him bounce all over the living room while I read a short bit of school to him.  Then the seat goes back in my closet.  So he thinks of it as a treat, & is more compliant when he gets to use it.  A form of bribery, I guess...  

We also let him earn "points" for each subject he does willingly, (and heavens, those worksheets take only 2 minutes to do, so NOT painful!), and 10 points adds up to 1 hr on the Kindle, playing a game.  THAT one has worked great so far!  (Again, bribery - I guess I'm all for it) :)

MammaG08
by Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 7:38 AM
1 mom liked this

 I really like the idea of earning points for lessons.   It is great to keep him on track because he gets "rewarded" many time throughout the school day, and it doesn't cost you much money!  I have a chart for my 4YO who is also doing kindergarten.  We also break up our school day with lots of breaks in between, and I always tell him I want him to "do his best"  (NOT "try your best," it implies that he might fail).   Lots of praise for each lesson done, and then at the end of the day he gets a star sticker on his chart.  It has 20 little train cars, and when they are all filled up, he gets to go somewhere special (which I would probably take him anyway, but he doesn't know that).  It works great for us! 


Quoting AmyMamie:

My kindergartener is EXACTLY like yours, and one thing that has helped (during this first short week of school, lol) is the bouncy ball chair from Timberdoodle (I remember that you're a fan of that website also).  So any time he starts in on "I want to be done - I'm bored", I get out that bouncy seat and let him bounce all over the living room while I read a short bit of school to him.  Then the seat goes back in my closet.  So he thinks of it as a treat, & is more compliant when he gets to use it.  A form of bribery, I guess...  

We also let him earn "points" for each subject he does willingly, (and heavens, those worksheets take only 2 minutes to do, so NOT painful!), and 10 points adds up to 1 hr on the Kindle, playing a game.  THAT one has worked great so far!  (Again, bribery - I guess I'm all for it) :)


 

mem82
by Platinum Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 8:10 AM
1 mom liked this
Sounds like a bad case of end of summeritis. Lol
ballerina.2006
by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 8:20 AM
1 mom liked this
If my 2nd grader is coping attitude, backtalking, gettin things wrong on purpose, and not trying, she is sent to her room until her attitude can change and she is willing to try. My pre-k, if he wanders I make him come back and finish and/or clean up and then be on his way. He does what he can at this time. I refuse to fight with him, either of them really.
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twyliatepeka
by Bronze Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 3:35 PM

We just stop & take break & come back to whatever it was later in the day. If we don't stop for that break it is usually more stress on me than on her.

kirbymom
by Sonja on Aug. 22, 2013 at 6:29 PM
1 mom liked this
Sounds like the just needed some whole body energy to help the focus. I know that my kids and I need some sugars to help us have enough energy to play and focus on what is at hand. Maybe that is why your lo's were able to focus later. They had some sugar and were energized and able to focus more.
oredeb
by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 6:33 PM
1 mom liked this

 yea for the brownies!!!

mommi2bka
by Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 8:15 PM

We finally figured out a system this year that seems to be going wonderfully.  My two youngest love school but my oldest has never liked any learning and that is why we pulled him out of public school to begin with.  We have struggled with feeling like the bad guy if we had to enact punishment, but this year I think we got it figured out pretty well.

My kids thrive on some structure so I made a list of rules (pay attention, read directions, stay on task, do your best, no interrupting, have a good attitude, etc).  

If they break a rule they get an initial on the white board we have.  If they get all three initials they get checks.  3 initials and checks means they get chores after school (they already have occassional but not much).  

HOWEVER, if they get no initials they get 2 points for the day.  If they get 1 initial, they get 1 point.  Two initials is just neutral.  8 points for a week= candy bar (they usually just pick a big pack of gum-sweet!) and 10 points= the candy and a soda of choice (they don't get soda often).

 We have some other things worked in for points per month having a movie night or other activities.  The incentive has been enough to motivate them to work hard at it.  At first, it was only the threat of chores that kept my teen from breaking rules but once he missed out on treats his younger siblings got, he has done the best he has EVER done.  It has made such a tremendous difference in our day.  

I know this sounds really structured, but we have been so laid back in the past and we have ended in frustration.  I needed something black in white to make it really clear for the kids.

almondpigeon
by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 8:55 PM
I like that idea...I really think our biggest problem is that I'm too laid back. both of my kids love gum and sprite, but they hardly ever get either. I think I will implement a reward system like that.
thanks!!


Quoting mommi2bka:

We finally figured out a system this year that seems to be going wonderfully.  My two youngest love school but my oldest has never liked any learning and that is why we pulled him out of public school to begin with.  We have struggled with feeling like the bad guy if we had to enact punishment, but this year I think we got it figured out pretty well.

My kids thrive on some structure so I made a list of rules (pay attention, read directions, stay on task, do your best, no interrupting, have a good attitude, etc).  

If they break a rule they get an initial on the white board we have.  If they get all three initials they get checks.  3 initials and checks means they get chores after school (they already have occassional but not much).  

HOWEVER, if they get no initials they get 2 points for the day.  If they get 1 initial, they get 1 point.  Two initials is just neutral.  8 points for a week= candy bar (they usually just pick a big pack of gum-sweet!) and 10 points= the candy and a soda of choice (they don't get soda often).

 We have some other things worked in for points per month having a movie night or other activities.  The incentive has been enough to motivate them to work hard at it.  At first, it was only the threat of chores that kept my teen from breaking rules but once he missed out on treats his younger siblings got, he has done the best he has EVER done.  It has made such a tremendous difference in our day.  

I know this sounds really structured, but we have been so laid back in the past and we have ended in frustration.  I needed something black in white to make it really clear for the kids.


celticdragon77
by on Aug. 23, 2013 at 6:43 AM
1 mom liked this

I am likely of no help, but here is a bump, and a wish of good luck. 

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