I don't need coffee today, I need a sound proof box so I can just go vent.
I love my husband, but he's clueless and not much help.
I love my kids, but I'm pretty sure that they've been replaced by alien pod people. Aliens that are specifically wildly insane.
I tell my older kids to get out their math books and do math... I start working with the 5 yr old on questions. She plays with a ball and starts rolling all over the place and is so distracted I end up having to tell her to put the ball down. Son, who is supposed to get his math book out, comes over to the ball and starts playing catch with himself with the same ball, I turn to focus him back on the task of getting math out and let him know playing with the ball is distracting and to go do math.. meanwhile...
5 yr old answers the same question we've been trying to learn and say right for 5 mintues with "Sodom and Granola"... which makes the whole house break down laughing. I have to scoot my son along AGAIN to get on his math.
Meanwhile, older daughter starts yelling across the room for help with math, interrupting. Her father is talking back at her instead of going OVER there to discuss it. I'm between the two, trying to get my 5 yr old to say GOMORRAH and tell her Granola is something we eat.... after the fourth time, I had to tell her to get the teacher's manual out and review it quietly to herself and stop interrupting.
The baby toddles up to me and whew... pooopie... while trying to wipe his bottom, I'm still working on "GO MOR AH"
My neighbor's dog is even being disruptive because she is whining at our door for my dog. Not a normal situation... but the neighbors have been fighting so much it's upsetting even the dog, so I'm tolerating it today and just sending her home.
Anyway, back on track...
"sodom and granola."
Ok.. After about 12 minutes, I gave up and she is still saying granola. Now, though, she thinks it's funny and is doing it on purpose.
Successful morning... huh?