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Homeschooling Moms Homeschooling Moms

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Hi! I have a question, and need some advice.

Does anyone else have a kid that just DOESNT WANT TO DO ANYTHING?!?! He fights and screams and just hates learning anything. He doesn't function in a large group-which is why we decided on HS. He loves ABC mouse, but will not TRY!!! I started him at the beginning and he acts like he knows nothing.

 

what are some ideas i can try to get him engaged? make him a little more anxious to get his work done and not fight me so hard? incentives? rewards?

 

thanks ladies :)

by on Sep. 6, 2013 at 1:12 PM
Replies (11-20):
mommaJ333
by on Sep. 6, 2013 at 8:18 PM
1 mom liked this

I have also recognized that when I do physical activities in the morning ( dancing, singing, playing) and start "schooling" later in the day my 6 year old (with poor focusing skills and highly emotional spirit) does much better since she has gotten some wiggles out and has done things more enjoyable for her age. This also gives me the chance to observe her "mood" , which helps me plan a successful day. This hasnt let me down yet :)

Beniegenie
by Member on Sep. 7, 2013 at 10:14 AM
1 mom liked this
Not sure how old he is, but he sounds like K-1 grade, you could try to get books at the library. My kids love to go to the library. Get stuff that is of interests to him. Start your day with some crazy energy release, like the other lady was saying about dance, run around outside screaming and chasing one another. Then have quiet time with his books. Read to him, have him help you with the words if he is at that age. Talk about what you are reading. My kids love bugs so I buy them nets and bug bags and such then we go to the library and get books on those bugs. Othe things you can try is have him tell you things to write like a story or a list of things he liked or learned. Try to take him to stuff like Exploritoriums and other hands on learning places, beach museums, nature walks etc. Help him build interests. Another good incentive is do not allow any TV, Movie or electronic time as a norm. Make it something he has to earn. My some loves to play games on the IPad. If he does well with school that day he gets to play. Also make sure you have plenty of educational games on it so when he is playing on weekends or such he is still learning. Remove all other games though. When he starts takin an interest in learning without a struggle you can add other stuff... Hope this helps.
tuffymama
by Bronze Member on Sep. 7, 2013 at 11:14 AM
1 mom liked this
A schedule flip as others have suggested has really worked for us, with time for art or crafts, wiggle time, and rewards along the way. If you research how to determine your child's learning style and you teach according to that style for six or more weeks and he still won't cooperate, I wouldn't shame you for resorting to outright bribery. ;0) Good luck! I've got a stubborn little beastie here who requires a lot of creative thinking on my part if I want him to learn. ODS was a cake walk in comparison to this big challenge.
KrissyKC
by Silver Member on Sep. 7, 2013 at 12:23 PM
1 mom liked this

If he had a bad experience in school, did you bring him home and start working with him right away??   Kids that had negative experiences in "school" will carry that fear and anxiety home with them.   You have to take time to completely de-school and get his system to relax.

After a little time, start bringing in the fun stuff.   Don't call it school work or anything.   Just go to the library weekly, enjoy books together.   Do crafts, etc...   cooking is terrific.

Also, get some books about homeschooling kids with ADHD and such.   I'm reading one called "Homeschooling the Challenging Child" currently.  

Another one I recommend that isn't about homeschooling but about dealing with discipline is, "Have a New Kid by Friday."    Dr. Lehman isn't a homeschool supporter (not that he's against it per say).. .but his concepts and ideas about discipline are well worth the read.  I've also heard he wrote a book titled, "Have a new YOU by Friday."   Haven't read that yet.

Also, examine your child's learning style and personality.   When you do pick up on schooling again, try to have a totally different approach.   Personally, my daughter found ABC mouse boring.   She is also possibly ADHD with ODD.   At least she fits many MANY of the markers for it.  (she's 5).

I've had some success with having a hands-on morning board.   She gets to flip to the date, count from a counting jar and write on the board in different places with dry erase.   It has a clock with manipulative hands, change with velcro to make the date (we are only working with pennies right now), and a manipulative spot to teach place value.

I also have success with movement games...  Putting letters on the floor (tape, laminated paper, whatnot) or numbers, and having her jump to them based on their sounds or recognition or something.

She is much slower to teach than the other two were because some days I just plod through the basics, but can tell she's not being successful and I just let it go at the basics.   Other days, we have more success.

I use time4Learning.com to supplement what we do in the morning.   She likes this MUCH better than ABC mouse.  If she refuses to do school with me at all that morning, then she gets no "screen" time what so ever.   If some one watches something on TV, she has to go to another room while the program is on.   She also doesn't get T4L if she didn't do her morning board work.  

However, I start out trying to generate excitement and interest.   A child with ADHD and ODD takes a lot of praise and encouragement first before you set up some discipline standards.   Some days I feel like I'm doing back flips to just get her to count to 12!!!    Other days, she counts to 48 or 49 without a hitch.

I also have a reward jar.   Since I'm trying to get rid of sugar, corn syrup, and dyes; I don't want to give candy as rewards.   Also, little cheap toys aren't well liked around here (especially with the 15 month old around)...

So, this year I decided to get rolls of change and make them each a change jar.   This jar is not allowance and cannot be spent how they like.   They cannot go buy a toy, candy, whatnot...  Instead, it's for our vacations and "reward days".. . like every so often we will go to chuck e cheeses after school and the kids can spend their change playing a few games... or they can save it for our upcoming vacation and spend it on something then.  



 



mem82
by Platinum Member on Sep. 7, 2013 at 12:37 PM

Good luck! My son gave me fits until he turned eight. Now, it's like I have a completely different kid.

BrettsMommy927
by on Sep. 7, 2013 at 4:57 PM

Thank you every one. I was actually a member of cafe mom when he was born, but i lost internet, and profile info for a couple years. SO GLAD I CAME BACK.

 

The problem with his old school, was that they let him do whatever he wanted. No  joke, found that out on the last day. to avoid his meltdowns, he was allowed to teach class, be the lineleader, play while other kids learned. I tried to tell him he needed to come sit by mnommy and let the teacher teach, and the teacher told me NO NO its ok, he likes to teach.

i was like

 

>:O

I am still cleaning up after them :(

KickButtMama
by Shannon on Sep. 8, 2013 at 1:42 AM

My eldest is on the spectrum. I almost quit HSing because I thought he wasn't learning anything. Then I caught him teaching his brother addition! Teaching does help reinforce the lesson. I now make a game for each child to teach the other once in a while. They love it. 

My youngest went through a couple of years of the type of foot dragging your describing. He eventually grew out of it. But he also knew he didn't get tv, video games, etc before n the hours of 10am and 3 PM whether he did school work or not. Also we do behavior bucks which have worked wonders for us. http://kickbuttcrazylapbooks.blogspot.com/search?q=Behavior+bucks

Quoting BrettsMommy927:

Thank you every one. I was actually a member of cafe mom when he was born, but i lost internet, and profile info for a couple years. SO GLAD I CAME BACK.


The problem with his old school, was that they let him do whatever he wanted. No  joke, found that out on the last day. to avoid his meltdowns, he was allowed to teach class, be the lineleader, play while other kids learned. I tried to tell him he needed to come sit by mnommy and let the teacher teach, and the teacher told me NO NO its ok, he likes to teach.

i was like


>:O

I am still cleaning up after them :(


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maggiemom2000
by Member on Sep. 8, 2013 at 10:34 AM

Try some of these hands on, engaging activities with him. You'll probably want to avoid worsheets and "seat work"

Growing Readers

Are you Growing a Reader? Homeschooling your early reader? No need to buy an expensive curriculum to get your child off to a great start at reading. Do you want to avoid tedious, boring worksheets and instead learn through engaging hands on activities and play? Here are a collection of links on teaching your child to read and write for free:

Sight Words or Phonics? How about a balanced approach?


Read some background on using a balanced literacy approach to teach your child to read. What does your Kindergartner need to learn in reading? See the list of Common Core Kindergarten Standards and links to activities to teach those skills to your emergent reader.

What do I need to Buy?

The short answer: nothing. You can do all of the lessons and activities here using books from the library and things you already have around the house like paper, pens, chalk, and index cards. In this post I suggest some possible things you can buy to enhance the activities. These are supplies that you will be able to use for years, not just for a couple of lessons. Manipulatives like a good set of magnetic letters can be used from preschool into elementary school, beginning with basic letter identification, on to phonics, building sight words, word families and complex multisyllabic spelling words.


Shared Literature

Read, read, read to your child. Reading aloud to your child is the best thing you can do to grow a reader. Go beyond reading aloud and teach your child reading skills while enjoying great literature! (Preschool, Pre-K, Kindergarten)


Early Alphabet Learning and the Name Game

How to begin teaching the alphabet and other early literacy skills to your preschooler or Kindergartner. (Preschool, Pre-K, Kindergarten)

Kindergarten Sight Words and Early Reading Skills

What you need to know to get started teaching your Kindergartner to read including a look at some of the Common Core Standards for Kindergarten reading. (Kindergarten)

Kindergarten Sight Word Sentences

After you know about teaching sight words to your Kindergartner you are ready to move on to sentences. (Kindergarten)

Kindergarten Sight Words Reading Books

Once you start introducing your child to the sight words he is ready for his first emergent-reader book. (Kindergarten)


Beginning Phonics for Emergent Readers

Once your child knows most of the letters of the alphabet and their sounds he is ready to learn to "sound out" simple CVC words. This post shows you lots of hands on multi-sensory ways to practice early phonics. (Kindergarten, First Grade)


Learn 37 Words and Know how to Read and Write Over 500 Words!

Your child can learn more phonics "rules" by learning several words with common letter patterns. When your child learns to make analogies and manipulate onset and rime they can quickly read and write hundreds of new words. These are better known as word families. (Kindergarten, First Grade, Second Grade)
BrettsMommy927
by on Sep. 10, 2013 at 1:13 PM

Just wanted to let everyone know,i turned reading into a competition, for everyword he got right, he got a point. Just successfully made it through a site word book!

BrettsMommy927
by on Sep. 12, 2013 at 1:30 AM

he is loving a points system, hes still kinda resistant, but hes almost up to 50 points, which is a small reward! Lets hope after the first reward, he will adapt a little easier :D

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