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8 Most Annoying Things You Can Say to a Homeschooling Mom

8 Most Annoying Things You Can Say to a Homeschooling Mom

by Adriana Velez

homeschoolWhat's the best thing about homeschooling your kids? It's hard to say. Maybe it's the joy of watching your children learn in a creative, hands-on environment customized just for their learning style and interests. Nahhh, it's actually the stupid questions people ask you. A lot of people out there who know nothing about homeschooling sure to have some surprisingly strong opinions about it, right? Here's our favorite things you should never say to a homeschooling mom.

1. Are you, like, wicked religious? Okay, some parents choose to homeschool for religious reasons. But parents choose homeschooling for a whole range of reasons -- most often because they believe it's the best way to educate their kids. A lot of the time, homeschooling has nothing to do with religion.

2. I would never assume I was qualified enough to teach my child. Who says homeschooling parents do all the teaching by themselves? Homeschoolers aren't all spending six hours at home bent over books -- it's often more creative than that. There are communities that do lessons together, tutors you can hire. There's a whole range of resources.

3. Don't you want your kid to have any friends? It's homeschooling, not prison. Kids can still participate on soccer teams, take music lessons, join Girl Scouts, play at the park with the other children. And there's no guarantee kids will always make friends at their school. Ever heard of bullying?

4. How do you stand spending so much time with your kids? I could never spend so much time with my kids! First of all, homeschooled kids aren't necessarily spending all their time with their parents. Secondly... I'm sorry you don't like spending time with your kids.

5. I can't even get my kids to clean their rooms. How do you get your kids to do their school work? Um... sounds like someone needs to work on their parenting skills. 

6. Hey kid, what's the capital of Kansas? What's Pi? How do you measure the radius of a circle? Who was America's first president? How do you spell discombobulation? How many fingers am I holding up? Um, thanks for those "gotcha!" questions. It's true. We just sit around all day doing macrame and singing folk songs and now my kids know nothing. Your brilliant quizzing scheme exposed us. Here's my phone so you can call CPS.

7. Good luck getting your kid into college. Yeah... don't think that's going to be a problem. Your kid, on the other hand...

8. And best of all: WHAT ABOUT SOCIALIZATION? So, what about it? Like the whole amazing world we explore isn't enough for my kid, he has to spend six hours a day inside a room with 35 other children every day or he'll grow up a mushroom.

What are the most annoying things you've heard people say about homeschooling?

 

by on Sep. 9, 2013 at 8:00 AM
Replies (31-40):
KrissyKC
by Silver Member on Sep. 10, 2013 at 11:46 PM

My pastor, whom I very much loved and cherished...  he pulled me aside once and asked me why I didn't put the kids in school and get a real job. (I was babysitting 30-50 hours weekly and homeschooling at the time.)   He said, "I appreciate what you are trying to do for your kids and I'm sure you enjoy homeschooling.  But I mean, my own kids went to the public school and they are doing fine."


bluerooffarm
by Gold Member on Sep. 11, 2013 at 7:58 AM
1 mom liked this

 Last night at soccer, a woman asked if my kids went to _____ Elementary.  I said no, we homeschool.  She looks at her son and says to him (about a 2 yo), "Oh that wouldn't work for us, we need friends.  And Mommy needs peace once in a while." 

So I guess my boys don't have friends at soccer.  Hmmm.... good to know.

DyslexiaParent
by Member on Sep. 11, 2013 at 9:51 AM

LOVE IT!! Now, we just need to get the world OUTSIDE of homeschooling to read this!!

SandyKC
M.S. Instructional Design, Homeschooling Mom of "Light of My Life" Boys,
Author, Individualized Instruction Design Consultant


all2gethernow
by Member on Sep. 11, 2013 at 9:56 AM
2 moms liked this
Totally heard this one!!!!
Yeah. Too lazy to get them to school, so I teach algebra and biology instead. Smh!!!


Quoting sha_lyn68:

I've told this story before I believe. Most annoying thing said to me was said by someone I've known since high school and it eventually ended our friendship.  I hadn't seen her since graduating until about 10 yrs later when our daughters were in a preschool tumbling class together. The girls hit it off and became best friends so we ended up hanging out togther a lot. She knew the trouble we were having with DS's school and how hard I was trying to find a solution. When we decided to homeschool, she flat out told me that the only reason people homeschool is because they are too lazy to get up and get their kids ready for school.


WizardOfAhs
by Member on Sep. 11, 2013 at 11:17 AM

I think it's equal parts jealousy/guilt/and cluelessness as to why people even feel the need to make comments. I know a couple where the husband makes snide remarks about our hs kids and lifestyle (really, we are quite normal...we 'socialize' with THEM don't we?), acting like he's just joking ya know....meanwhile his wife takes me aside and asks me how it's going, and keeps saying she wishes she could do it! I think if either one of them had just a smidgeon more confidence they would be doing it too =)

WizardOfAhs
by Member on Sep. 11, 2013 at 11:24 AM
1 mom liked this

What I REALLY want to say is...I don't WANT my kids to socialize with your kids in PS. I don't want my kids to know what bullying, snobbish, clique-ish little butts they can be. I don't want them thinking twerking is cool (or even know what that is, lol), or worrying that their clothes is what makes them who they are. I remember very little of any actual schooling when I went, but I remember plenty about peer-pressure, drama, and a whole lot of feeling bad about who I was. The things I read about now and see on Youtube? No Thanks! My kids can stay 'unsocialized'.


Quoting Bluecalm:

I've had a number of people tell me they guess it's alright if I hs as long as I am providing socialization opportunities. Seriously? This was a decision my dh and I made based on what we believed to be best for our son. I'm not asking anyone to approve of our choice or give their blessing. I wonder how they'd like it if I questioned their decision to send their child to ps.

I also had someone tell me recently my son isn't really being socialized if I'm present, that he has to be alone with other children and adults.


Quoting MammaG08:

Why is it that people, TOTAL STRANGERS even, feel they have a "right" to start grilling us about homeschooling?!?  I am so fed up, I mean to the rim with people who stick their nose into MY PERSONAL FAMILY  business!!  This is beyond annoying for me know, it is downright infuriating.   I guess some people are just so surprised that we chose a different path than they did for their kids, or maybe they feel inferior as parents because they didn't choose the same for their kids, I don't know.   What about embracing differences in people ~ aren't the schools always trying to teach that?  UGH. 




MammaG08
by Member on Sep. 11, 2013 at 1:45 PM
1 mom liked this

 Crazy, itsn't it?  Like you said, how would they like it if we went around giving them lectures on what they are doing right/wrong, and why do they send their kids to ps?  Sometimes I think I should just say, "Since you know so much better what is good for my kids, what time should I drop them and all of their stuff off at your house?"  Ya know!!! 

And how did this person determine that even if your kid is intereacting with other kids (like at a park, let's say), that because you are there they are not socializing?!  AHHHH!!!  It really makes me want to scream.  How about 4H, or girl/boy scouts; if the parent is present then it is not true socializing?  Give me a BREAK!!! 

Ok, I feel better now.  Thanks. 

Quoting Bluecalm:

I've had a number of people tell me they guess it's alright if I hs as long as I am providing socialization opportunities. Seriously? This was a decision my dh and I made based on what we believed to be best for our son. I'm not asking anyone to approve of our choice or give their blessing. I wonder how they'd like it if I questioned their decision to send their child to ps.

I also had someone tell me recently my son isn't really being socialized if I'm present, that he has to be alone with other children and adults.


Quoting MammaG08:

Why is it that people, TOTAL STRANGERS even, feel they have a "right" to start grilling us about homeschooling?!?  I am so fed up, I mean to the rim with people who stick their nose into MY PERSONAL FAMILY  business!!  This is beyond annoying for me know, it is downright infuriating.   I guess some people are just so surprised that we chose a different path than they did for their kids, or maybe they feel inferior as parents because they didn't choose the same for their kids, I don't know.   What about embracing differences in people ~ aren't the schools always trying to teach that?  UGH. 



 

ablackdolphin
by Bronze Member on Sep. 11, 2013 at 2:48 PM
1 mom liked this

#1 hands down is "What about socialization?" UGH, drive me nuts.  DH and I usually respond with something like...well, what do you mean...or what exactly does that mean...

One co-worker of Dh's asked...well what about Socialism (yes, used that word instead of socialization)...are you freaking kidding me...

Mommynay2
by Member on Sep. 11, 2013 at 9:17 PM

Just the other day I went to the store with Destinay, and the cashier asked, "Why isn't she in school?" So I told him that I homeschool her. "He responded, "Wow that must be great for her, she can sleep as long as she wants, eats  whenever she wants, and just do whatever she wants." I told him, just because I homeschool her doesn't mean she can do whatever she wants whenever she wants to. We have more structure than that, and she has responsibilities. Then I paid for my groceries and walked out. I swear I think some people can be clueless.

monkeybunns
by Member on Sep. 12, 2013 at 11:58 AM
We take a homeschooling from birth type approach meaning we read to our kids, play educational games, have lots of educational toys (ie when my sitting infant is playing with a shape sorter I talk about the color of the shape, what it is, when I give a snack we count it, etc) and my boys have had an interest in learning to read early compared to most so we work on letter sounds. A "friend" from high school called me absolutely insane for homeschooling my kids so early and said I was disgusting and a whole bunch of other horrible things and said I was scarring them for life and they would be unsocialized, etc. I thought my family was bad but no one has said anything so hurtful as what he did and he blew up at me because I said I was proud that I could homeschool so my kids could learn the importance of our constitution, pledge of allegiance, and founding fathers so they could help safe guard that in their generation and I wasn't ok with how our freedoms were slowly being taken away out from under of noses so I was not in support of the way our president was going about something and that was his blow up at me. Sorry so long. I think he had a picture in his head I sat my newborn in a chair and said LEARN and did hours of flashcards or something when we really don't do anything different than most parents though I'm a little more intentional about it and follow my kids cues and only for dangerous things say "You're not quite old enough"(nothing learning related, just things like cutting with a super sharp knife, etc)
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