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Is this a selfish reason to homeschool?

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My 6yo has been home for a three day weekend and I LOVED it. It was so nice to have her home and that made me realize, I miss her. She was the only one who didn't go to pre school so I was used to having her home with me. She was my buddy :-)

Now during the week I really don't have much time to spend with her. After school I pick up her and Michelle (a little girl I baby sit). All of us go to the REC center, do homework, eat snack, play at the park, come home cook dinner, then it's bath, teeth and bed. On the weekends I catch up on house work and run errands. I just feel like her childhood is slipping away while I'm busy doing other things.

She's doing fine in school, but I'm really, really considering pulling her out next year. The thought of sharing her day and watching her learn and grow is very appealing.

Is that selfish of me?

by on Oct. 8, 2013 at 11:13 AM
Replies (41-50):
paganbaby
by Silver Member on Oct. 8, 2013 at 4:52 PM

I asked her. She said she missed being home. Then she said she wanted to homeschool. I told her I missed her too but she'd have to wait until next year. She didn't look happy,lol.

Quoting usmom3:

 Dose she miss you as much as you miss her? I would think it would be mutually beneficial if you two where as close as you say you where & now that bond is not as strong as it once was!

You have to do what is going to be best for your family!

Quoting paganbaby:

You know this is going to piss my dh off,lol. You guys are supossed to talk me out of it. He thinks she's doing fine and not to mess with it.

Quoting usmom3:

 Absolutely NOT, childhood is so fleeting that we should all wish to spend our days with our children because once they are grown we will never get this time with them again!


 


Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

AutymsMommy
by Silver Member on Oct. 8, 2013 at 4:59 PM


Of course academics aren't the only thing to take into consideration, which is why I mentioned emotional and physical wellbeing.

I get that you don't want to miss out on her childhood... but, again, are you doing this for her, or for you? Because I keep seeing "I". "I don't want to regret", "I don't want to miss out", etc.

Do I enjoy my daughter being away for 7 hours a day (sometimes upwards of 10 hours a day, when she stays after for extra help)? Not a bit. Do I recognize that she's thriving? You bet. I would never dream of pulling her from a working school environment, just because *I* miss her.

Quoting paganbaby:

:-)

I get what you're saying but is academics the only valid reason to school a child a certain way? Yes, she's happy as far as I can tell at school. She's learning, she has friends. But she's also gone for 6 hours a day. That's so much time for a 6 year old. 

20 years from now, I don't want to look back and know that fear kept me from spending as much quality time as possible with my children.

Quoting AutymsMommy:


Hey, that's what I'm here for, lol.

Look, I would no sooner send a child away from a WORKING homeschool environment, than I would pull them from a WORKING any-school environment.

By "working" I mean that you are happy with progress made, content and skills taught, emotional and physical well being, etc.

If she's happy and doing well, don't rock the boat - the minute you do, it becomes less about her and her education, and more about YOU and YOUR happiness and, yes, that's selfish.

Quoting paganbaby:

I knew I could count on you to give me the other side of the argument,lol.

That's a big reason I'm hesitating. If it's not broken, why fix it? What if I pull her out and she worse at home?

Quoting AutymsMommy:

I wouldn't pull a child out of a working school environment.







I am a Home Schooling, Vaccinating, Non spanking, Nightmare Cuddling, Dessert Giving, Bedtime Kissing, Book Reading, Stay at Home Mom. I believe in the benefit of organized after school activities and nosy, involved parents. I believe in spoiling my children. I believe that I have seen the village and I do not want it anywhere near my children. Now for the controversial stuff:  we're Catholic, we're conservative, and we own guns (now there's no need to ask, lol).             Aimee















usmom3
by BJ on Oct. 8, 2013 at 5:02 PM
1 mom liked this

 AWWW, so she dose want to be home with you too!

Quoting paganbaby:

I asked her. She said she missed being home. Then she said she wanted to homeschool. I told her I missed her too but she'd have to wait until next year. She didn't look happy,lol.

Quoting usmom3:

 Dose she miss you as much as you miss her? I would think it would be mutually beneficial if you two where as close as you say you where & now that bond is not as strong as it once was!

You have to do what is going to be best for your family!

Quoting paganbaby:

You know this is going to piss my dh off,lol. You guys are supossed to talk me out of it. He thinks she's doing fine and not to mess with it.

Quoting usmom3:

 Absolutely NOT, childhood is so fleeting that we should all wish to spend our days with our children because once they are grown we will never get this time with them again!


 


 

paganbaby
by Silver Member on Oct. 8, 2013 at 5:34 PM

Awww!!! *Blushes*

Quoting Countess79:

Honestly... I think it is a sign your a great mom! 


Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

paganbaby
by Silver Member on Oct. 8, 2013 at 5:44 PM

If I'm being honest, it's mostly on my part right now. She likes being home but school isn't unbearable. 

The only one who has strong feelings at this point is me. So now what I have to look at is, is keeping her in school going to hurt her? Is taking her home going to hurt her? If the answer to both of them is no, then what's the harm in choosing one that pleases me?

*Genuinely looking forward to your answer

And 10 hours a day?? That's crazy long! Glad to hear she's thriving though :-)

Quoting AutymsMommy:


Of course academics aren't the only thing to take into consideration, which is why I mentioned emotional and physical wellbeing.

I get that you don't want to miss out on her childhood... but, again, are you doing this for her, or for you? Because I keep seeing "I". "I don't want to regret", "I don't want to miss out", etc.

Do I enjoy my daughter being away for 7 hours a day (sometimes upwards of 10 hours a day, when she stays after for extra help)? Not a bit. Do I recognize that she's thriving? You bet. I would never dream of pulling her from a working school environment, just because *I* miss her.

Quoting paganbaby:

:-)

I get what you're saying but is academics the only valid reason to school a child a certain way? Yes, she's happy as far as I can tell at school. She's learning, she has friends. But she's also gone for 6 hours a day. That's so much time for a 6 year old. 

20 years from now, I don't want to look back and know that fear kept me from spending as much quality time as possible with my children.

Quoting AutymsMommy:


Hey, that's what I'm here for, lol.

Look, I would no sooner send a child away from a WORKING homeschool environment, than I would pull them from a WORKING any-school environment.

By "working" I mean that you are happy with progress made, content and skills taught, emotional and physical well being, etc.

If she's happy and doing well, don't rock the boat - the minute you do, it becomes less about her and her education, and more about YOU and YOUR happiness and, yes, that's selfish.

Quoting paganbaby:

I knew I could count on you to give me the other side of the argument,lol.

That's a big reason I'm hesitating. If it's not broken, why fix it? What if I pull her out and she worse at home?

Quoting AutymsMommy:

I wouldn't pull a child out of a working school environment.








Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

paganbaby
by Silver Member on Oct. 8, 2013 at 5:45 PM

  • She does! *Big Grin*
Quoting usmom3:

 AWWW, so she dose want to be home with you too!

Quoting paganbaby:

I asked her. She said she missed being home. Then she said she wanted to homeschool. I told her I missed her too but she'd have to wait until next year. She didn't look happy,lol.

Quoting usmom3:

 Dose she miss you as much as you miss her? I would think it would be mutually beneficial if you two where as close as you say you where & now that bond is not as strong as it once was!

You have to do what is going to be best for your family!

Quoting paganbaby:

You know this is going to piss my dh off,lol. You guys are supossed to talk me out of it. He thinks she's doing fine and not to mess with it.

Quoting usmom3:

 Absolutely NOT, childhood is so fleeting that we should all wish to spend our days with our children because once they are grown we will never get this time with them again!


 


 


Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

melissanoel
by on Oct. 8, 2013 at 5:48 PM

I don't think it's selfish unless she is totally against it. If she would be upset by not going to school, then I think that would be a selfish decision. Most kids would love that though!

Momof697
by Member on Oct. 8, 2013 at 5:50 PM
1 mom liked this

I know lots of moms that homeschool for that reason. me included. I have many others but that is one of them.

sassykymom4
by on Oct. 8, 2013 at 5:58 PM
I was homeschooles and I did homeschool my DD..

MY ADVICE:
Consider your DD. Does she like school? Just because you're lonely does that justify taking her away from something she loves??

I hated being homeschooled. I missed Prom and Homecomings. My father pulled me out if school because he thought public schools did more harm than good..my sisters both stayed in public school and I was jealous. To this day at 30 yrs old I wish I got to experience all the things my friends/family members did.My only friends were other homeschooled kids who were just as lonely. Or the kids in Sunday school.

My DD loved it on the other hand..but I chose to put hee back in public school after she needed speech therapy and the school denied her due to the fact that she wasn't a student..
I will be the first to say my DD has trouble making friends. To much time at home with me has caused her to think she's much more mature..to mature for kids her own age.

paganbaby
by Silver Member on Oct. 8, 2013 at 6:10 PM

So far she sounds pretty happy to be at home,lol. I showed all of her brothers work and told her about the stuff he's learning. 

Quoting melissanoel:

I don't think it's selfish unless she is totally against it. If she would be upset by not going to school, then I think that would be a selfish decision. Most kids would love that though!


Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

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