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Homeschooling Moms Homeschooling Moms

Is this a selfish reason to homeschool?

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My 6yo has been home for a three day weekend and I LOVED it. It was so nice to have her home and that made me realize, I miss her. She was the only one who didn't go to pre school so I was used to having her home with me. She was my buddy :-)

Now during the week I really don't have much time to spend with her. After school I pick up her and Michelle (a little girl I baby sit). All of us go to the REC center, do homework, eat snack, play at the park, come home cook dinner, then it's bath, teeth and bed. On the weekends I catch up on house work and run errands. I just feel like her childhood is slipping away while I'm busy doing other things.

She's doing fine in school, but I'm really, really considering pulling her out next year. The thought of sharing her day and watching her learn and grow is very appealing.

Is that selfish of me?

by on Oct. 8, 2013 at 11:13 AM
Replies (81-90):
army_5_wife
by on Oct. 9, 2013 at 1:27 PM
1 mom liked this

 no there not lol. thank you, you too.


Quoting paganbaby:

Oh wow! I bet your days are never dull,lol. Good luck on your journey :-)

Quoting army_5_wife:

 5,4,3 and 13 months, so we have just started our homeschool journey and so far everybody loves it.

 

Quoting paganbaby:

Time with their father is definitely of the utmost importance! How old are they?

Quoting army_5_wife:

I dont find it selfish but it is also one of my reasons for homeschooling my four kids. Among other reasons i.e. I dont not like nor do I trust the public school systems to not only teach my kids what they need but to give them the one on one time they deserve. Another big reason for me is my dh is military so anytime he has off I want our kids to be home with him not at school and I want to be able to travel and take vacations when we want not planning around a "school year".

 

 


 

 



 

redhead-bedhead
by Bronze Member on Oct. 9, 2013 at 1:31 PM
1 mom liked this

It's not selfish at all. It's actually a good reason to homeschool. My poor nephew has to be on his bus at 7 am and he doesn't get off until 5pm. After that he has to do homework, chores, dinner, and then bed.

My sister-in-law works 3rd shift, so she only sees him for about 4 hours a day.

I couldn't do that.

unsuspected
by Member on Oct. 9, 2013 at 1:35 PM
3 moms liked this
No. You're her mother. You know your daughter, your home and your family better than anyone. If you are thinking about it and feeling strongly lead to that end, don't let any doubts sneak in and misdirect you.
Tal0n
by Member on Oct. 9, 2013 at 4:48 PM
1 mom liked this

Of course it's selfish.  But that's NOT A BAD THING.

We're taught that being selfish is right up there with pillaging and sacking villages.

It's selfish...but it's a good selfish and a perfectly sound reason to homeschool.

sassykymom4
by on Oct. 9, 2013 at 9:13 PM
My sisters and brother didn't like the idea at all of HS..my sister while on leave from school and was on homebound just decided to quit and get her GED..Homeschooling takes alot of dedication. Its not as easy as most ppl think and some school districts actually require a copy if your planned coursework a semester ahead and have the right to sit in to ensure your child is being taught.
Everyone I knew that was homeschooled wished they had the school experience..
My DD was 9. We kept her home a yr. She was taught by my stepmom who has a degree in teaching primary grades and my father who was a teacher. She loved staying home but hated the loneliness..she would go to the park and watch the other kids..she would call them babies and try to Bully them when they did play with her..I talked to a tgerapist and she said it was common in children who are hs due to them spending so much time with adults and not other children. They don't see themselves as a child. When I put her back in school we had to hold her back because our homeschooling curriculum was 2 semesters behind the schools curriculum. So now she really feels like an odd child out. She's bigger and older than her classmates.
HS in our household was a horrible idea.


Quoting paganbaby:

She likes school but at this age I think she would enjoy being at home more. We talked today and she said she wanted to homeschool. She was under the impression that you only HS if you do badly in PS. I told her there are many reasons why kids HS and eplained a few.

I'm sorry you had such a hard time. That sucks. But I don't understand why were your sisters allowed to stay?

Also, how long was your dd HS and did she ever play with other kids?

Quoting sassykymom4:

I was homeschooles and I did homeschool my DD..



MY ADVICE:

Consider your DD. Does she like school? Just because you're lonely does that justify taking her away from something she loves??



I hated being homeschooled. I missed Prom and Homecomings. My father pulled me out if school because he thought public schools did more harm than good..my sisters both stayed in public school and I was jealous. To this day at 30 yrs old I wish I got to experience all the things my friends/family members did.My only friends were other homeschooled kids who were just as lonely. Or the kids in Sunday school.



My DD loved it on the other hand..but I chose to put hee back in public school after she needed speech therapy and the school denied her due to the fact that she wasn't a student..

I will be the first to say my DD has trouble making friends. To much time at home with me has caused her to think she's much more mature..to mature for kids her own age.





fallenangel_353
by on Oct. 10, 2013 at 7:28 AM

I dont think its selfish to geuinely want to be with your children... Tis why my 8 yr old is still home with me! LOL. TBH it has nothing to do with the public school system. I just want to be with my kids :) I have homeschooled him since k, now we are in 3rd. I also just started homeschooling my 5 yr old dd :)

mem82
by Platinum Member on Oct. 10, 2013 at 8:09 AM
3 moms liked this
I'm sorry but your information on homeschooling is either completely outdated by years or just wrong.
I'm sorry hsing didn't work out in your dd's case, but maybe you guys were just doing it wrong for her to be so behind and lonely.
Oh, and the therapist was really misinformed. We, home schools, are fairly used to people having the wrong impression about it because they *knew* someone who didn't like it. I know you said you did it for one child, for one year. I doubt, from your attitude, that you researched all your options or the actual theories behind hsing. I would be more than happy to explain how it works to you. 8) I have plenty of studies to back me up.
Also, homeschooling doesn't work for all kids, and school at home doesn't work well for many kids. Maybe your daughter was the exception. I imagine that if her grandmother wasn't a huge fan of homeschooling and if she was already having issues (since she had a therapist and you pulled her out of school) any schooling would have been not overly effective that year.


Quoting sassykymom4:

My sisters and brother didn't like the idea at all of HS..my sister while on leave from school and was on homebound just decided to quit and get her GED..Homeschooling takes alot of dedication. Its not as easy as most ppl think and some school districts actually require a copy if your planned coursework a semester ahead and have the right to sit in to ensure your child is being taught.

Everyone I knew that was homeschooled wished they had the school experience..

My DD was 9. We kept her home a yr. She was taught by my stepmom who has a degree in teaching primary grades and my father who was a teacher. She loved staying home but hated the loneliness..she would go to the park and watch the other kids..she would call them babies and try to Bully them when they did play with her..I talked to a tgerapist and she said it was common in children who are hs due to them spending so much time with adults and not other children. They don't see themselves as a child. When I put her back in school we had to hold her back because our homeschooling curriculum was 2 semesters behind the schools curriculum. So now she really feels like an odd child out. She's bigger and older than her classmates.

HS in our household was a horrible idea.




Quoting paganbaby:

She likes school but at this age I think she would enjoy being at home more. We talked today and she said she wanted to homeschool. She was under the impression that you only HS if you do badly in PS. I told her there are many reasons why kids HS and eplained a few.

I'm sorry you had such a hard time. That sucks. But I don't understand why were your sisters allowed to stay?

Also, how long was your dd HS and did she ever play with other kids?

Quoting sassykymom4:

I was homeschooles and I did homeschool my DD..





MY ADVICE:


Consider your DD. Does she like school? Just because you're lonely does that justify taking her away from something she loves??





I hated being homeschooled. I missed Prom and Homecomings. My father pulled me out if school because he thought public schools did more harm than good..my sisters both stayed in public school and I was jealous. To this day at 30 yrs old I wish I got to experience all the things my friends/family members did.My only friends were other homeschooled kids who were just as lonely. Or the kids in Sunday school.





My DD loved it on the other hand..but I chose to put hee back in public school after she needed speech therapy and the school denied her due to the fact that she wasn't a student..


I will be the first to say my DD has trouble making friends. To much time at home with me has caused her to think she's much more mature..to mature for kids her own age.







paganbaby
by Silver Member on Oct. 10, 2013 at 9:52 AM

Now I just have to explain that to my husband,lol.

Another reason he's leary to bring her home, is Audi's very smart. He feels she has a real shot at a university, not just a comunity college. He doesn't have high hopes for our other two but never says that in front of them. He's worried that she mighht be short changed by homeschooling, especially in highschool.

Quoting bluerooffarm:

 Then, yes, I would bring her home.  I would feel like I was playing favorites.  I know your older 2 NEED to be homeschooled, but it would still feel like favoritism to send DD to school if she wants to be home with you'all.

Yeah, PS is off the table.  I could not make him feel that way.

Quoting paganbaby:

I think she might be. She gets a little upset when her brother tells her about the things we do and places we go during the day. She says she wants to play games and go for walks with me like we used to (during the summer).

And poor baby! I understand where you're coming from though. I could't wait until kinder to send dd off so I could have more tme with her brother. Now I feel terrible about it :-/

Quoting bluerooffarm:

 Here's the thing, is she feeling a bit jealous of the time you are spending with her siblings?  I was considering sending my youngest to kinder next year because he is wild and hard to control and takes up a lot of my time and I just wanted a year of possible peace in the house.  Then I said it to a friend in front of him (only that I was thinking of sending him, not why) and he threw a crying jag about it.  He asked if I don't like him.  Yikes!  Is she the only PSer?  And how does she feel about that?


 


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AutymsMommy
by Silver Member on Oct. 10, 2013 at 10:55 AM


I'll agree wholeheartedly that the comments about socialization are completely outdated. Most of the homeschooled children I know, socialize with age peers (and other children in general) AT LEAST once or twice a week - actively engage and socialize, I mean.

I'll disagree that "school at home" rarely works. The sheer number of happy users who are with "school at home" programs like Seton, Kolbe, Memoria Press, Abeka, etc proves that theory wrong; the sheer number of happy now-adults who graduated from programs like Kolbe and Seton proves that many children do great with school at home. Many children need that structure.

Quoting mem82:

I'm sorry but your information on homeschooling is either completely outdated by years or just wrong.
I'm sorry hsing didn't work out in your dd's case, but maybe you guys were just doing it wrong for her to be so behind and lonely.
Oh, and the therapist was really misinformed. We, home schools, are fairly used to people having the wrong impression about it because they *knew* someone who didn't like it. I know you said you did it for one child, for one year. I doubt, from your attitude, that you researched all your options or the actual theories behind hsing. I would be more than happy to explain how it works to you. 8) I have plenty of studies to back me up.
Also, homeschooling doesn't work for all kids, and school at home doesn't work well for many kids. Maybe your daughter was the exception. I imagine that if her grandmother wasn't a huge fan of homeschooling and if she was already having issues (since she had a therapist and you pulled her out of school) any schooling would have been not overly effective that year.


Quoting sassykymom4:

My sisters and brother didn't like the idea at all of HS..my sister while on leave from school and was on homebound just decided to quit and get her GED..Homeschooling takes alot of dedication. Its not as easy as most ppl think and some school districts actually require a copy if your planned coursework a semester ahead and have the right to sit in to ensure your child is being taught.

Everyone I knew that was homeschooled wished they had the school experience..

My DD was 9. We kept her home a yr. She was taught by my stepmom who has a degree in teaching primary grades and my father who was a teacher. She loved staying home but hated the loneliness..she would go to the park and watch the other kids..she would call them babies and try to Bully them when they did play with her..I talked to a tgerapist and she said it was common in children who are hs due to them spending so much time with adults and not other children. They don't see themselves as a child. When I put her back in school we had to hold her back because our homeschooling curriculum was 2 semesters behind the schools curriculum. So now she really feels like an odd child out. She's bigger and older than her classmates.

HS in our household was a horrible idea.




Quoting paganbaby:

She likes school but at this age I think she would enjoy being at home more. We talked today and she said she wanted to homeschool. She was under the impression that you only HS if you do badly in PS. I told her there are many reasons why kids HS and eplained a few.

I'm sorry you had such a hard time. That sucks. But I don't understand why were your sisters allowed to stay?

Also, how long was your dd HS and did she ever play with other kids?

Quoting sassykymom4:

I was homeschooles and I did homeschool my DD..





MY ADVICE:


Consider your DD. Does she like school? Just because you're lonely does that justify taking her away from something she loves??





I hated being homeschooled. I missed Prom and Homecomings. My father pulled me out if school because he thought public schools did more harm than good..my sisters both stayed in public school and I was jealous. To this day at 30 yrs old I wish I got to experience all the things my friends/family members did.My only friends were other homeschooled kids who were just as lonely. Or the kids in Sunday school.





My DD loved it on the other hand..but I chose to put hee back in public school after she needed speech therapy and the school denied her due to the fact that she wasn't a student..


I will be the first to say my DD has trouble making friends. To much time at home with me has caused her to think she's much more mature..to mature for kids her own age.









I am a Home Schooling, Vaccinating, Non spanking, Nightmare Cuddling, Dessert Giving, Bedtime Kissing, Book Reading, Stay at Home Mom. I believe in the benefit of organized after school activities and nosy, involved parents. I believe in spoiling my children. I believe that I have seen the village and I do not want it anywhere near my children. Now for the controversial stuff:  we're Catholic, we're conservative, and we own guns (now there's no need to ask, lol).             Aimee















mem82
by Platinum Member on Oct. 10, 2013 at 10:59 AM
I don't really consider that school at home, though. I suppose I should have been more clear. 8)
If sassy was trying to completely recreate a class room in her house for a single child and it failed, that doesn't surprise me.


Quoting AutymsMommy:


I'll agree wholeheartedly that the comments about socialization are completely outdated. Most of the homeschooled children I know, socialize with age peers (and other children in general) AT LEAST once or twice a week - actively engage and socialize, I mean.

I'll disagree that "school at home" rarely works. The sheer number of happy users who are with "school at home" programs like Seton, Kolbe, Memoria Press, Abeka, etc proves that theory wrong; the sheer number of happy now-adults who graduated from programs like Kolbe and Seton proves that many children do great with school at home. Many children need that structure.


Quoting mem82:

I'm sorry but your information on homeschooling is either completely outdated by years or just wrong.

I'm sorry hsing didn't work out in your dd's case, but maybe you guys were just doing it wrong for her to be so behind and lonely.

Oh, and the therapist was really misinformed. We, home schools, are fairly used to people having the wrong impression about it because they *knew* someone who didn't like it. I know you said you did it for one child, for one year. I doubt, from your attitude, that you researched all your options or the actual theories behind hsing. I would be more than happy to explain how it works to you. 8) I have plenty of studies to back me up.

Also, homeschooling doesn't work for all kids, and school at home doesn't work well for many kids. Maybe your daughter was the exception. I imagine that if her grandmother wasn't a huge fan of homeschooling and if she was already having issues (since she had a therapist and you pulled her out of school) any schooling would have been not overly effective that year.





Quoting sassykymom4:

My sisters and brother didn't like the idea at all of HS..my sister while on leave from school and was on homebound just decided to quit and get her GED..Homeschooling takes alot of dedication. Its not as easy as most ppl think and some school districts actually require a copy if your planned coursework a semester ahead and have the right to sit in to ensure your child is being taught.


Everyone I knew that was homeschooled wished they had the school experience..


My DD was 9. We kept her home a yr. She was taught by my stepmom who has a degree in teaching primary grades and my father who was a teacher. She loved staying home but hated the loneliness..she would go to the park and watch the other kids..she would call them babies and try to Bully them when they did play with her..I talked to a tgerapist and she said it was common in children who are hs due to them spending so much time with adults and not other children. They don't see themselves as a child. When I put her back in school we had to hold her back because our homeschooling curriculum was 2 semesters behind the schools curriculum. So now she really feels like an odd child out. She's bigger and older than her classmates.


HS in our household was a horrible idea.







Quoting paganbaby:

She likes school but at this age I think she would enjoy being at home more. We talked today and she said she wanted to homeschool. She was under the impression that you only HS if you do badly in PS. I told her there are many reasons why kids HS and eplained a few.

I'm sorry you had such a hard time. That sucks. But I don't understand why were your sisters allowed to stay?

Also, how long was your dd HS and did she ever play with other kids?

Quoting sassykymom4:

I was homeschooles and I did homeschool my DD..







MY ADVICE:



Consider your DD. Does she like school? Just because you're lonely does that justify taking her away from something she loves??







I hated being homeschooled. I missed Prom and Homecomings. My father pulled me out if school because he thought public schools did more harm than good..my sisters both stayed in public school and I was jealous. To this day at 30 yrs old I wish I got to experience all the things my friends/family members did.My only friends were other homeschooled kids who were just as lonely. Or the kids in Sunday school.







My DD loved it on the other hand..but I chose to put hee back in public school after she needed speech therapy and the school denied her due to the fact that she wasn't a student..



I will be the first to say my DD has trouble making friends. To much time at home with me has caused her to think she's much more mature..to mature for kids her own age.













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