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What to do when homeschooling just isn't an option? I'm in tears... Update 12/19

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She's doing great! I've also added a special school snack that only she is allowed to eat. Another thing I did is bump her bedtime back to 6:30, lights out at 7pm. That sounds so early I know but the extra sleep is helping the most I think. So far so good *Fingers crossed*

At my dh's urging, I've decided to give it a solid month. He says if we don't see any progress or she gets worse, I can take her home. So here's the new plan.

I bought her an alarm clock and set it for 6:00 am. When she wakes up, she has to get herself dressed, hair brushed, shoes on and backpack ready, then... we watch a show together until 7:00am when we leave for school. After the girl I babysit goes home, we can play any game or puzzle she wants. All of this is in addition to her star chart where she can earn ice cream and Chuck e Cheese. Our morning went much more smoothly! But walking to school was a little rocky :-/ Still, I have high hopes and I know Christmas vacation will help. But either way, it's nice to have dh's support.

I just don't know what's going on with 7yo dd. While it's true that she does very well in school; great grades, likes her teachers, has lots of friends. Getting her to school is becoming harder and harder.

It started in kindergarten. The beginning of the year was fine. But then she started having anxiety about school. She wouldn't get dressed or brush her hair. She'd fight me nearly every morning and we'd be late constantly. But once she was at school, she was the perfect student. Things started leveling out towards the end of the year and I thought that was that.

Now it's starting again. She crying, I don't want to go to school. Won't get dressed or get her shoes on. At school she's fine but now at home she's angry and emotional all the time. Anything will set her off. I've tried reward charts. For every 10 days she's in school I'll take her to get an ice cream cone. For every 20 days she can go to Chucke cheese. She erased all of her stars today.

I'm at my wits end. I don't want to force it but I just can't HS her right now either. Not that she wants too. She said she doesn't want to go to any school. Just stay home. I'm having a meeting with her teacher and the principal tomorrow. I don't know what to do :-( Forcing my baby to school is breaking my heart.

by on Dec. 4, 2013 at 11:34 AM
Replies (21-30):
paganbaby
by Silver Member on Dec. 4, 2013 at 1:12 PM

I agree. If she won't talk to me, maybe she'll talk to someone else.

Quoting Precious333: I would do.counciling. Maybe a counsilor will help get to the bottom of tha anxiety and find a solution.


Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

usmom3
by BJ on Dec. 4, 2013 at 1:13 PM
1 mom liked this

 If I where you I would bring her home now, take from now until the first of the year off for everyone & just enjoy the holidays. At the beginning of the year incorporate her in to what you are doing with your son, they are so close in age that you should be able to teach them side by side with no problem. Have your oldest help you with working with her so that both younger children have a helper.

Precious333
by Julia on Dec. 4, 2013 at 1:16 PM
Is she the only one in school? If so,maybe she is feeling left out or something.

Quoting paganbaby:

I agree. If she won't talk to me, maybe she'll talk to someone else.

Quoting Precious333: I would do.counciling. Maybe a counsilor will help get to the bottom of tha anxiety and find a solution.


paganbaby
by Silver Member on Dec. 4, 2013 at 1:24 PM

You don't know how much I've thought of just that! But my main worry is, it won't fix the problem. I need to find out what's causing her anxiety in the first place. If it turns out that bringing her home will fix it then I'll do it immediately.

Quoting usmom3:

 If I where you I would bring her home now, take from now until the first of the year off for everyone & just enjoy the holidays. At the beginning of the year incorporate her in to what you are doing with your son, they are so close in age that you should be able to teach them side by side with no problem. Have your oldest help you with working with her so that both younger children have a helper.


Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

paganbaby
by Silver Member on Dec. 4, 2013 at 1:25 PM

She is and that could be it. She hasn't said anything but that's not really surprising there.

Quoting Precious333: Is she the only one in school? If so,maybe she is feeling left out or something.

Quoting paganbaby:

I agree. If she won't talk to me, maybe she'll talk to someone else.

Quoting Precious333: I would do.counciling. Maybe a counsilor will help get to the bottom of tha anxiety and find a solution.



Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

Precious333
by Julia on Dec. 4, 2013 at 1:27 PM
Pulling her out may actually be the answer then.

Quoting paganbaby:

She is and that could be it. She hasn't said anything but that's not really surprising there.

Quoting Precious333: Is she the only one in school? If so,maybe she is feeling left out or something.



Quoting paganbaby:

I agree. If she won't talk to me, maybe she'll talk to someone else.

Quoting Precious333: I would do.counciling. Maybe a counsilor will help get to the bottom of tha anxiety and find a solution.



paganbaby
by Silver Member on Dec. 4, 2013 at 1:30 PM

I'm keeping that on the back burner right now. I kinda hope it is the problem though. That's something I can easily remedy it.

Quoting Precious333: Pulling her out may actually be the answer then.

Quoting paganbaby:

She is and that could be it. She hasn't said anything but that's not really surprising there.

Quoting Precious333: Is she the only one in school? If so,maybe she is feeling left out or something.



Quoting paganbaby:

I agree. If she won't talk to me, maybe she'll talk to someone else.

Quoting Precious333: I would do.counciling. Maybe a counsilor will help get to the bottom of tha anxiety and find a solution.




Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

Precious333
by Julia on Dec. 4, 2013 at 1:33 PM
I bet it could be part of it. If there is more to it, i bet staying home would help too. I had a lot of anxiety in school growing up as well, it got a lot worse when my parents seperated and divorced, and i begged to stay at home....school added to my emotional stress.

Quoting paganbaby:

I'm keeping that on the back burner right now. I kinda hope it is the problem though. That's something I can easily remedy it.

Quoting Precious333: Pulling her out may actually be the answer then.



Quoting paganbaby:

She is and that could be it. She hasn't said anything but that's not really surprising there.

Quoting Precious333: Is she the only one in school? If so,maybe she is feeling left out or something.





Quoting paganbaby:

I agree. If she won't talk to me, maybe she'll talk to someone else.

Quoting Precious333: I would do.counciling. Maybe a counsilor will help get to the bottom of tha anxiety and find a solution.




paganbaby
by Silver Member on Dec. 4, 2013 at 1:38 PM

I recommended that to my friend who just seperated from her husband. Her 8yo son is have a really hard time with it and school. 

Quoting Precious333: I bet it could be part of it. If there is more to it, i bet staying home would help too. I had a lot of anxiety in school growing up as well, it got a lot worse when my parents seperated and divorced, and i begged to stay at home....school added to my emotional stress.

Quoting paganbaby:

I'm keeping that on the back burner right now. I kinda hope it is the problem though. That's something I can easily remedy it.

Quoting Precious333: Pulling her out may actually be the answer then.



Quoting paganbaby:

She is and that could be it. She hasn't said anything but that's not really surprising there.

Quoting Precious333: Is she the only one in school? If so,maybe she is feeling left out or something.





Quoting paganbaby:

I agree. If she won't talk to me, maybe she'll talk to someone else.

Quoting Precious333: I would do.counciling. Maybe a counsilor will help get to the bottom of tha anxiety and find a solution.





Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

grouchymama
by on Dec. 4, 2013 at 1:40 PM

 Is she the only child going to school? Maybe she feels like she is being sent away while everyone else is at home with you. I know I would have been upset and moody at home if my sister got to stay with mom all day and I had to go off to school. Maybe you could carve out some special time to spend with her.

Quoting paganbaby:

I'm still trying to find my HS feet with her brother and sister. Adding her would put a lot more stress on me and dh is very against it. Her brother (8yo) takes a lot of my time right now and he feels I wouldn't be able to give everyone the attention they need.

No, she's never been bullied, in fact she's one of the more popular kids in her class. Something I was very proud of seeing how I have always been a wall flower,lol.

Quoting debramommyof4: I know there has to be a reason but why can you not homeschool her right now?

And is she or has she been bullied as that may cause the reluctance?


 

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