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Holy crap, I think I'm an unschooler! How did that happen??

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It came to me in a two part epiphany.

First I was surfing the net and came across a blog called Unschooling till it hurts. Basically she saying that unschooling isn't black or white, all or nothing. It just means you don't force any type of education on your kids. Compromise, suggest, but not force. That got my attention. I've tried unschooling in the past with ds but it was a flop. Now I'm wondering if I just took too far a didn't try for more balance.

Then later while dh was watching a Japanese show with subtitles, I heard ds talking. He was reading them! Not all of them, they were going too fast, but quite a few. That brought me back to when he's written notes for fun or to get out of trouble,lol.

ThenlightbulbI didn't teach him how to walk or talk. I didn't teach him how to ride a bike or draw a picture. I gave him the tools and lots of encouragement but in the end he learned because he wanted too. He had the desire too. How much would it have sucked if I gave him formal lessons on how to speak properly or walk with grace?

So then I took a hard look at our HS day. Casually I questioned ds on what he liked and didn't like about school. He LOVES watching science shows with me in the morning (we pause A LOT to discuss what's going on), he likes it when I read to him from Magic tree house, he likes when I read him Life of Fred stories, he likes when I read him science books (Cell Defenders is his hands down favorite right now) He likes telling me stories which I write down in his reading journal, and cool facts for his science journal that he dictates to me also. He likes doing science experiments and drawing pictures. And last but not least, he likes writing Audi and his friends notes. Not everyday day though.

Anyone else notice a trend here? lol

Two big things he does not like is having to write and reading books. I looked at that and thought, why do it then? What would happen if I stopped requiring him to read and write? I'm darn near an unschooler anyway. Why not just let that last bit go and trust that he'll learn in his own time?

by on Dec. 18, 2013 at 11:27 AM
Replies (41-50):
TidewaterClan
by on Dec. 26, 2013 at 2:03 PM

There's no real good way to say this, and I honestly don't mean this to be offensive, but isn't this the approach you've taken with your older daughter for the last five months? 

Quoting paganbaby:


Before I delve into anything else here, I feel like we had a misunderstanding. I was posting about unschooling. How my son doesn't need formal lessons to learn how to read or write. Did you took from that, that I expect my ds to magically teach himself? lol

celticdragon77
by on Dec. 26, 2013 at 2:28 PM
2 moms liked this

I had nothing to say about the "unschooling". To be honest, I am kind of confused at what is going on at your house. I am terrible at remembering who has said what, but I thought you were the one saying you had held back your child and had not done school for 7mths and that you start in January. I didn't think that was considered unschooling. So I figure that I missed something or have something confused, so I decided to stay out of all that. 

I was simply replying to the comment of yours about saying that traumatized adults are illiterate. It seemed a bit like a blanket statement (I could be wrong). I wanted to point out that some people have severe learning disorders that make learning how to read extremely difficult; and the schools and parents can sometimes really struggle to teach them how to read. Also, that some homeschoolers also are known to have illiterate children. I should have made myself more clear and concise, without the anecdotal story. 


Quoting paganbaby:


Before I delve into anything else here, I feel like we had a misunderstanding. I was posting about unschooling. How my son doesn't need formal lessons to learn how to read or write. Did you took from that, that I expect my ds to magically teach himself? lol

Quoting celticdragon77:



paganbaby
by Silver Member on Dec. 26, 2013 at 4:35 PM

I wrote about me not requiring my son to read or write and trusting that he would learn in his own time. Then you mentioned that neither your husband nor your daughters could have taught themselves how to read and write all on their own. I forgot to address that earlier.

That is me too but I was posting about my 14yo dd. She's also being unschooled but I'm taking a different approach with her than I am with my 8yo son. Different kids and all.

Never said all illiterate adults are traumitized, just the ones in my experiances. I'm sure learning disabilities could have played a big part too. Uncaring teachers coupled with a difficulty learning, no strong support at home, a recipe for disaster.

Oh and yes I remember the post about the homeschoolers in Virginia. I posted that one too. I don't consider those people true homeschoolers. They're not keeping their children home out of a desire to teach them but rather to shelter them from the big bad secular world. Seeing how education wasn't their primary goal, the fact that their children were illiterate doesn't surprise me. *Note, I have nothing against religion being a part of HS as long as the basics are also taught*

Quoting celticdragon77:

I had nothing to say about the "unschooling". To be honest, I am kind of confused at what is going on at your house. I am terrible at remembering who has said what, but I thought you were the one saying you had held back your child and had not done school for 7mths and that you start in January. I didn't think that was considered unschooling. So I figure that I missed something or have something confused, so I decided to stay out of all that. 

I was simply replying to the comment of yours about saying that traumatized adults are illiterate. It seemed a bit like a blanket statement (I could be wrong). I wanted to point out that some people have severe learning disorders that make learning how to read extremely difficult; and the schools and parents can sometimes really struggle to teach them how to read. Also, that some homeschoolers also are known to have illiterate children. I should have made myself more clear and concise, without the anecdotal story. 


Quoting paganbaby:


Before I delve into anything else here, I feel like we had a misunderstanding. I was posting about unschooling. How my son doesn't need formal lessons to learn how to read or write. Did you took from that, that I expect my ds to magically teach himself? lol

Quoting celticdragon77:




Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

paganbaby
by Silver Member on Dec. 26, 2013 at 4:40 PM
1 mom liked this

Not offended at all,lol.

No, I've given dd 5 months off to de-school. To decompress from the rigors and stressed of public education and find her passions. This is her time to bum around and relax. Starting January first, she's going to begin Time 4 learning (her choice) We'll see how that works out, if not, we'll find something else. The big difference between her and ds, is that she craves more structure. Her homeschooling experiance will reflect that.

Quoting TidewaterClan:

There's no real good way to say this, and I honestly don't mean this to be offensive, but isn't this the approach you've taken with your older daughter for the last five months? 

Quoting paganbaby:


Before I delve into anything else here, I feel like we had a misunderstanding. I was posting about unschooling. How my son doesn't need formal lessons to learn how to read or write. Did you took from that, that I expect my ds to magically teach himself? lol


Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

celticdragon77
by on Dec. 26, 2013 at 5:10 PM
1 mom liked this

I think that you read too much into my reply. My reply was not concerning how you choose to educate your children - in fact, to reiterate, I am confused by what is going on in your home concerning education (nor is it really my concern). 

You made a comment, and it looks as though I read it as a blanket statement when maybe you did mean it as such. However, please understand that your experiences are limited concerning the 300million people in the USA. 

I was just giving an anecdotal story of my familys experience. I just thought I would share other reasons why some people are illiterate. I did not mean to confuse things by doing so.

It is NOT just as simple as that... "Uncaring teachers coupled with a difficulty learning, no strong support at home, a recipe for disaster." There are plenty of parents and teachers who bust their ass off trying to help a child with a learning disability, and do not get the results one would expect to see. 


Quoting paganbaby:

I wrote about me not requiring my son to read or write and trusting that he would learn in his own time. Then you mentioned that neither your husband nor your daughters could have taught themselves how to read and write all on their own. I forgot to address that earlier.

That is me too but I was posting about my 14yo dd. She's also being unschooled but I'm taking a different approach with her than I am with my 8yo son. Different kids and all.

Never said all illiterate adults are traumitized, just the ones in my experiances. I'm sure learning disabilities could have played a big part too. Uncaring teachers coupled with a difficulty learning, no strong support at home, a recipe for disaster.

Oh and yes I remember the post about the homeschoolers in Virginia. I posted that one too. I don't consider those people true homeschoolers. They're not keeping their children home out of a desire to teach them but rather to shelter them from the big bad secular world. Seeing how education wasn't their primary goal, the fact that their children were illiterate doesn't surprise me. *Note, I have nothing against religion being a part of HS as long as the basics are also taught*

Quoting celticdragon77:

I had nothing to say about the "unschooling". To be honest, I am kind of confused at what is going on at your house. I am terrible at remembering who has said what, but I thought you were the one saying you had held back your child and had not done school for 7mths and that you start in January. I didn't think that was considered unschooling. So I figure that I missed something or have something confused, so I decided to stay out of all that. 

I was simply replying to the comment of yours about saying that traumatized adults are illiterate. It seemed a bit like a blanket statement (I could be wrong). I wanted to point out that some people have severe learning disorders that make learning how to read extremely difficult; and the schools and parents can sometimes really struggle to teach them how to read. Also, that some homeschoolers also are known to have illiterate children. I should have made myself more clear and concise, without the anecdotal story. 


Quoting paganbaby:


Before I delve into anything else here, I feel like we had a misunderstanding. I was posting about unschooling. How my son doesn't need formal lessons to learn how to read or write. Did you took from that, that I expect my ds to magically teach himself? lol

Quoting celticdragon77:





paganbaby
by Silver Member on Dec. 26, 2013 at 5:24 PM

It's okay if you're confused. I must admit I'm a tad confused about your husbands situation also. But like you said, It's none of my concern either. Now what I find odd is how you can disagree with the statement in red. How can the circumstances outlined below, be anything but a disaster?

Quoting celticdragon77:

I think that you read too much into my reply. My reply was not concerning how you choose to educate your children - in fact, to reiterate, I am confused by what is going on in your home concerning education (nor is it really my concern). 

You made a comment, and it looks as though I read it as a blanket statement when maybe you did mean it as such. However, please understand that your experiences are limited concerning the 300million people in the USA. 

I was just giving an anecdotal story of my familys experience. I just thought I would share other reasons why some people are illiterate. I did not mean to confuse things by doing so.

It is NOT just as simple as that... Uncaring teachers coupled with a difficulty learning, no strong support at home, a recipe for disaster. There are plenty of parents and teachers who bust their ass off trying to help a child with a learning disability, and do not get the results that they wish for.

Quoting paganbaby:

I wrote about me not requiring my son to read or write and trusting that he would learn in his own time. Then you mentioned that neither your husband nor your daughters could have taught themselves how to read and write all on their own. I forgot to address that earlier.

That is me too but I was posting about my 14yo dd. She's also being unschooled but I'm taking a different approach with her than I am with my 8yo son. Different kids and all.

Never said all illiterate adults are traumitized, just the ones in my experiances. I'm sure learning disabilities could have played a big part too. Uncaring teachers coupled with a difficulty learning, no strong support at home, a recipe for disaster.

Oh and yes I remember the post about the homeschoolers in Virginia. I posted that one too. I don't consider those people true homeschoolers. They're not keeping their children home out of a desire to teach them but rather to shelter them from the big bad secular world. Seeing how education wasn't their primary goal, the fact that their children were illiterate doesn't surprise me. *Note, I have nothing against religion being a part of HS as long as the basics are also taught*

Quoting celticdragon77:

I had nothing to say about the "unschooling". To be honest, I am kind of confused at what is going on at your house. I am terrible at remembering who has said what, but I thought you were the one saying you had held back your child and had not done school for 7mths and that you start in January. I didn't think that was considered unschooling. So I figure that I missed something or have something confused, so I decided to stay out of all that. 

I was simply replying to the comment of yours about saying that traumatized adults are illiterate. It seemed a bit like a blanket statement (I could be wrong). I wanted to point out that some people have severe learning disorders that make learning how to read extremely difficult; and the schools and parents can sometimes really struggle to teach them how to read. Also, that some homeschoolers also are known to have illiterate children. I should have made myself more clear and concise, without the anecdotal story. 


Quoting paganbaby:


Before I delve into anything else here, I feel like we had a misunderstanding. I was posting about unschooling. How my son doesn't need formal lessons to learn how to read or write. Did you took from that, that I expect my ds to magically teach himself? lol

Quoting celticdragon77:






Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

paganbaby
by Silver Member on Dec. 26, 2013 at 5:28 PM

RockEducation! I keep seeing you like every comment but mine ;-) Care to weigh in with your own?

AutymsMommy
by Silver Member on Dec. 26, 2013 at 5:43 PM
1 mom liked this

You may find it useless for every day application, but you're seriously short changing your child and their post-high school options if you do not teach them algebra.

Quoting acrogodess:

LOL. That is the kind I feel is useless for everyday application

Quoting paganbaby:

LOL! No, not that. I was talking about the other kind of algebra,lol.

Quoting acrogodess:

I surely don't use this every day LOL

a^2 + b^2 = c^2\!\,

or this

\sqrt{(a_1-b_1)^2 + (a_2-b_2)^2 + \cdots + (a_n-b_n)^2} = \sqrt{\sum_{i=1}^n (a_i-b_i)^2}.

Quoting paganbaby:

Most people don't realise they use it.

Quoting AutymsMommy:


Quoting acrogodess:Once you learn addition, subtraction, multiplication and division (how to count money basically) I find it useless lol.

Really? I use algebra on a daily basis... as I do fractions, decimals, conversions, etc.






I am a Home Schooling, Vaccinating, Non spanking, Nightmare Cuddling, Dessert Giving, Bedtime Kissing, Book Reading, Stay at Home Mom. I believe in the benefit of organized after school activities and nosy, involved parents. I believe in spoiling my children. I believe that I have seen the village and I do not want it anywhere near my children. Now for the controversial stuff:  we're Catholic, we're conservative, and we own guns (now there's no need to ask, lol).             Aimee















tairakittie
by Member on Dec. 26, 2013 at 5:44 PM
1 mom liked this
I love unschooling!! My 4 year old son is sonewhere between Kinder and 1st grade, he is even teaching himself how to read. I did letter tracing worksheets with DD, we tried a more structured approach with her during pre-k around 3-4 (she will be 6 in Jan) and I got so frustrated with her, she liked doing it but it turned more into a chore and because of how I was reacting to her not really trying anymore, I decided to back off. Then she went to actual PreK, already knowing how to write all of her letters, upper and lower case and knew her letter sounds, she platued. Her handwritting got better but she wasnt advancing. What i didnt know is her little brother was listening and.watching.the whole time, even when she wasnt, and has taught HIMSELF how to write and.now he is teaching himself to read!! My DD isnt very interested in reading, she still likes writing, but is more interested in animals, and anatomy and the baby currently baking in my belly. lol I have decided to take the rest of this year off completely and see where next year takes us!! :)
acrogodess
by Member on Dec. 26, 2013 at 5:53 PM
1 mom liked this
I still have several years before I need to worry about it. Alexander is in 7th and and Olivia is in 5th. Both are working at about a 5th and 6th grade level. Alexander was already behind grade level when I removed him from public school even though he was at the top of his class. Their dad is much better at math than I am and has agreed to handle it when it is time.

Quoting AutymsMommy:

You may find it useless for every day application, but you're seriously short changing your child and their post-high school options if you do not teach them algebra.

Quoting acrogodess:

LOL. That is the kind I feel is useless for everyday application

Quoting paganbaby:

LOL! No, not that. I was talking about the other kind of algebra,lol.

Quoting acrogodess:

I surely don't use this every day LOL

a^2 + b^2 = c^2\!\,

or this

\sqrt{(a_1-b_1)^2 + (a_2-b_2)^2 + \cdots + (a_n-b_n)^2} = \sqrt{\sum_{i=1}^n (a_i-b_i)^2}.

Quoting paganbaby:

Most people don't realise they use it.

Quoting AutymsMommy:


Quoting acrogodess:Once you learn addition, subtraction, multiplication and division (how to count money basically) I find it useless lol.

Really? I use algebra on a daily basis... as I do fractions, decimals, conversions, etc.






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