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Maybe I'm being petty but this really annoyed me...

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So I went anon and wrote this post in another group and got mostly negative feedback. I'm gonna try to explain it better here.

My husband and I have a set of friends. We've been friends since our oldest kids were 4 and 5 months. Yesterday we had them over to hang out. Now they come over every weekend so we do not consider them guests in our home anymore. Ok a little background. This family has 3 kids, 2 boys and a girl. Their kids are spoiled rotten and whine about almost everything. They also expect to get what they want when they want. Once they pitch a fit one of their parents tries to do whatevr the kid wants.

So we were at my house and my kid and her kid were playing skylanders. My son likes to run through the game and pick up very few things. Her son wanted to pick up everything and fool around. Once you get so far away from each other, the character who is furthest away ends up dying. Now our kids have played this game tons of times before and this is the first time her son has pitched a fit over they playing style of my son. They also play other games such as Halo (yes I know it's violent and we supervise) and her son whines because Aiden hardly ever dies and he dies often.
Anyway the kids mother yells at my son to "play the game right." I got irritated and told her that he was playing "right" because there isn't a right or wrong and if her son didn't like how mine plays then he doesn't have to play; however, this is the first time her son has complained about it. She continued to tell my kid and her kid how to play the game. Eventually I turned the game off because of the fighting and arguing and her getting snippy with my kid. Her kid got an attitude with me about it. I ignored him and his dad did something about it.

Am I wrong to think that it was fine how my son was playing the game. He slowed down for her son and her son wanted to just mess around. My son wanted to actually beat the levels. Also my son wasn't doing it to be mean and spiteful; that's just how he plays and it's never been an issue before.
by on Jan. 21, 2014 at 6:33 PM
Replies (11-20):
usmom3
by BJ on Jan. 21, 2014 at 7:30 PM

 I don't take kindly to anyone speaking to my child the way your friend was speaking to your son. I think I would have asked them to leave if they could not be respectful to everyone!

xomrs.chase
by on Jan. 21, 2014 at 7:31 PM
1 mom liked this
Oh I agree there. I'll be damned if i let someone speak to my son like that in front of me.

However, teaching your son to compromise isn't a bad idea, either. There's no reason they cant meet in the middle with how they play. This is coming from someone who has a sister 6yrs younger.. so I needed to compromise often when we played together.


Quoting chotovec82: I'm more about letting the kids sort it out themselves. I don't think adults need to intervene all that much. I got irritated because she yelled at my son over a stupid game. I don't yell at her kids at all so I feel she shouldn't yell at mine.



Quoting xomrs.chase: I wouldn't invite them over.





It sounds like both sides need to learn to compromise, but it seems her side had the worst reaction of the two.
chotovec82
by Bronze Member on Jan. 21, 2014 at 7:34 PM
I agree which is why he slowed down. I truly think that most kids will fix their own problems without adult interference. I'm not trying to say that my kid shouldn't have compromised but I am saying that an adult shouldn't treat a child the way she treated mine. I also think that him slowing down was valid but the boy didn't want to keep going he wanted to sit there and do the special moves of the characters over and over again. It was annoying.

Quoting xomrs.chase: Oh I agree there. I'll be damned if i let someone speak to my son like that in front of me.



However, teaching your son to compromise isn't a bad idea, either. There's no reason they cant meet in the middle with how they play. This is coming from someone who has a sister 6yrs younger.. so I needed to compromise often when we played together.




Quoting chotovec82: I'm more about letting the kids sort it out themselves. I don't think adults need to intervene all that much. I got irritated because she yelled at my son over a stupid game. I don't yell at her kids at all so I feel she shouldn't yell at mine.





Quoting xomrs.chase: I wouldn't invite them over.







It sounds like both sides need to learn to compromise, but it seems her side had the worst reaction of the two.
KickButtMama
by Shannon on Jan. 21, 2014 at 7:58 PM
1 mom liked this

You did great! I have to say I get really ticked whenever someone tries to scold my child right in front of me. Unless there is a physical danger thing going on, that's the only time I'm ok with someone (adult) treating my child like that. Especially when they have played that way before. Idk how you have them over so often. Spoiled brat kids turn my stomach 

Chasing3
by Bronze Member on Jan. 21, 2014 at 8:11 PM

i think it's a situation where kids have learned that pitching a fit and yelling loud enough makes a parent intervene on their behalf.

If neither parent got involved, they would have worked it out or stopped playing together.

Precious333
by Julia on Jan. 21, 2014 at 8:24 PM
That's just wrong!

Quoting chotovec82: I didn't like that they were calling my kid a brat. I can take another persons opinion but you don't need to name call my kid.



Quoting celtic77dragon:

Before I go any further - by negative feedback - do you mean that you didn't like the feedback or that they were actually mean spirited in nature?  

chotovec82
by Bronze Member on Jan. 21, 2014 at 8:26 PM
He's really not a brat. Everyone loves him in our homeschool co-ops and they always tell me how mannerly and polite he is. He also plays real well with his younger siblings. I've never had any problem with my friends kids and him playing together before. Even if he was a brat; I'd think adult women would know better than to say mean things about a child.

Quoting Precious333: That's just wrong!



Quoting chotovec82: I didn't like that they were calling my kid a brat. I can take another persons opinion but you don't need to name call my kid.





Quoting celtic77dragon:

Before I go any further - by negative feedback - do you mean that you didn't like the feedback or that they were actually mean spirited in nature?  

Precious333
by Julia on Jan. 21, 2014 at 8:30 PM
Agreed! Never ever should an adult call names.

Quoting chotovec82: He's really not a brat. Everyone loves him in our homeschool co-ops and they always tell me how mannerly and polite he is. He also plays real well with his younger siblings. I've never had any problem with my friends kids and him playing together before. Even if he was a brat; I'd think adult women would know better than to say mean things about a child.



Quoting Precious333: That's just wrong!





Quoting chotovec82: I didn't like that they were calling my kid a brat. I can take another persons opinion but you don't need to name call my kid.







Quoting celtic77dragon:

Before I go any further - by negative feedback - do you mean that you didn't like the feedback or that they were actually mean spirited in nature?  

Bleacher-mom
by Member on Jan. 21, 2014 at 9:00 PM
1 mom liked this

I think before it got that far I would have said that if they can't play with out complaining, it would just get turned off and no one can play. Then I would let my child play as soon as they leave.

TJandKarasMom
by Debbie on Jan. 22, 2014 at 9:34 AM

I don't think you were wrong.  I have a hard time with parents who let their kids get away with everything.  Whining is not acceptable for a child older than 2 IMO.  I mean once in a while it happens, but I don't hear it in my house (when they were around 3 I literally would say "I can't hear you, you must not be using your big kid voice").  I just don't have the patience for it.  I can't stand whiny adults, and whiny kids turn into whiny adults.

So we just don't hang out with parents like that.  My husband would never be best friends with a man that coddles his children, lol, that would drive him crazy.  I would say take a break for a bit from having them over, teach your kids to give in a bit when they have a guest over, and maybe not play the video games so much when they do visit if that's the biggest problem.  I also don't think Halo is an appropirate game for children at all, but that's a different subject and you are the parent. 

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