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I feel like I'm "cheating life" for some reason...

Posted by on Feb. 10, 2014 at 5:05 PM
  • 7 Replies

I just recently started homeschooling my 13 year old and 5 year old.  I do not mind it at all...we are all very happy and homeschooling is working out beautifully for us...but I send a 17 year old, a 15 year old, and a 7 year old (they all do not want to be homeschooled) off to school every day. 

 Anyway, I can't shake the feeling that we (us that get to stay home) are "cheating life" for some reason.  I can't really explain it but I feel guilty.  Everything is just really really nice and we are always warm and cozy and comfortable.  So has anyone else felt this way?  How did you overcome the feeling? 

by on Feb. 10, 2014 at 5:05 PM
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by Group Admin on Feb. 10, 2014 at 5:40 PM
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It is a message that is really unerlying society right now.  If life isn't hard, if you are not working harder than others then you are somehow cheating.  And along with it goes this idea that if you stay home (work from home, school at home, whatever) then you should be working much harder than those who leave simply to prove that you are capable of doing the work at home.  Try not to let it bother you.  I've seen so many people buckle under that strain.  I have a SIL who is a medical transcriptionist from home and she expects (and her job expects) her to get more done than the ones in the office.  It can drive you crazy if you let it.

If you are happy, your kids are happy, and homeschooling is working; then you are successful!  

by on Feb. 10, 2014 at 5:57 PM
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 I agree with Blue! The way you should look at it is you & the children that are homeschooled are free to do as you wish & the others are confined by their choice! You should never feel bad about making the choice that makes you enjoy life & living!

by on Feb. 10, 2014 at 6:22 PM
3 moms liked this
This is my first year and I keep asking myself if this should be so fun. My girls enjoy learning and have extra time to be kids again. They're outside playing right now even instead of working on homework. Don't feel guilty for enjoying the time you have with your children who are home.

Welcome to homeschooling and the group too!
by on Feb. 10, 2014 at 6:39 PM
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I feel similar. Not as if we are cheating, but that we are so lucky. So blessed to have this opportunity! My SIL always says how she could never do it. It would be too hard, etc. And then says how I must be happy we don't have to wait for the bus (it was snowing). I mainly just see it as jealousy. Like she wishes she could but isn't confident in herself.
I and my children love it. They love to be home, love to learn, and are thriving so much since we left public school behind. :)
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by on Feb. 10, 2014 at 7:27 PM
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I get it! Being a SAHM mom and homeschooling for the first time I am always feeling guilty that my day isn't.....more. My husband has to force me to do things for myself because I still feel like I am spending "his" money, and I feel guilty if I ever complain or have an off day. 

I just have to remember my kids are happy, my husband is happy, so I need to be happy. 

by on Feb. 11, 2014 at 1:57 AM
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Why would you want to get rid of that feeling? You just said everything feels really really nice and that you are always warm cozy and comfortable. Stick with that. Kick the guilt to the curb. 

by Bronze Member on Feb. 11, 2014 at 10:07 AM

I understand. I have almost double guilt because I taught k/1 in a public school before I had my son. He's now 4 and we do preschool/kindergarten stuff and I feel guilty about all the fun stuff we do, games I've made that are SO much more fun than what I did teaching. Then I feel bad because I don't have to slave away on lesson plans, report cards, parent conferences or all that other extra stuff my teacher friends are doing on their "off time" like weekends and Christmas "break". I LOVE homeschooling because I get to do all the developmentally appropriate, exciting, thematic, fun teaching I wanted to do in my classroom but couldn't.  I feel a little guilty about my son's overflowing bookshelf (for about 5 minutes) but it's getting easier to not feel guilty and just be grateful. He loves it. I love it. He is happy, healthy, and safe and I've decided I should NEVER feel guilty about any of that! Sometimes I feel guilty because I'm not cleaning enough, or we only did some of my planned school work and not all of it but I am learning to focus on the positives (like our weekend trip to Houston that included an aquarium, and children's museum plus watching daddy judge a high school state drill competition) all learning experiences that were super fun and active. I think homeschool guilt is a lot like mommy guilt, it is only a problem if you let it be a problem.

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