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Math Battles every.single.day..help me please

Posted by on Apr. 8, 2014 at 7:22 PM
  • 40 Replies
1 mom liked this

Seriously every day math is a battle.  I have tried everything I can think of.  We started MUS recently, DD is 10.5 5th grade, this is our first year hsing.  I have tried many different methods and MUS is finally one that seems to work, but I am wondering if I let her start too far ahead.  I let her start with Delta (division).  She does not have all of her multiplication facts memorized, but I had kind of come to terms with the fact that she probably never will. 

We started the year with a text book, adjusted it almost immediately, then ditched it completely.  We have tried math games, Khan academy, we did a math journal for geometry which she enjoyed but still complained about.  She cannot deal with criticism, every time I try to show her something is wrong she starts throwing a fit.  She won't admit she's wrong, and refuses to listen at first.  I end up engaging most of the time even though I try very hard not to engage with her being argumentative and just rude. 

MUS was working, now she is at lesson 17 and it's getting hard, before this it was mostly review and it went well.  It now takes her an hour or more to complete one worksheet.  She does everything possible to stay distracted and not focus. 

I have her doing review on Mondays, so she does a 'test' from MUS and then something to review multiplication.  Yesterday she chose not to do the math game I left for her, so she started with that this morning.  She was so mad that I was making her review, she thinks she doesn't need it, but the reasonw e are doing it is because she really does need it.  I have explained repeatedly that it is not a punishment, it's supposed to be a fun way to practice.  I have explained that knowing multiplication facts makes division soooo much easier.   

It basically comes down to she hates math and just wants to refuse it no matter what I do.  I have tried everything to make it fun and enjoyable for her, and she still has a fit.  So I hate putting in extra effort when she refuses to even try :(

I am just tired.  I don't know what else to do.  Should I get MUS Gamma (multiplication) and make her do that instead of the division?  Should I just have her practice/review more instead of moving forward in Delta? 

*I am not ok with her just not doing math.  We feel math is too important to not have to learn it.  I also don't want to switch curriculum again, I am ok with switching things up a couple days a week, but I can't keep buying her new curriculum when one gets too hard.

by on Apr. 8, 2014 at 7:22 PM
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Replies (1-10):
TidewaterClan
by on Apr. 8, 2014 at 8:33 PM
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This is me thinking not criticizing at all, so never think that please.

Do you like math? Are you excited/happy or already frustrated when you begin? Is it easier for her to give you a hard time than your hubs? Any chance he could be her math teacher & it would be any different?
No_Difference
by Silver Member on Apr. 8, 2014 at 8:37 PM
2 moms liked this

my daughter is 9 and we're doing that book this year too. The only difference is, Jamie loves math,  BUT she still likes to drag her feet horribly at times. We made a "contract" which applies to all school work, but it has helped tremendously. She gets an hour of "tech time" - but it could be anything at all that she likes doing - at the start of every day. Each subject gets a certain amount of time. I allotted 1/2 hr for math, even though she gets it done in 15 minutes typically. If she goes over the 1/2 hr, she loses time from her hour - how ever much longer it took her. If she finishes faster, then she gets the remainder time added to her hour. That way, it is entirely on her. Also, I started letting Jamie check her answer with a different color pen, so I was no longer the bad guy. Then we'd go over on the board the ones she did wrong. She'd show me how she did the problem, and we'd discuss where she went astray. It has helped with the attitude immensely!

chotovec82
by Bronze Member on Apr. 8, 2014 at 8:45 PM
1 mom liked this
Maybe try a reward system with her. For instance I'm about to start mom bucks. I'm going to buy or make some fake money. If my children can do their school work without complaining they earn X amount of money. This money can be saved up and turned in for an item of their choice or they an trade me mom buck for 30 minutes of extra game time or other activities that they enjoy.

They can lose their mom bucks for the day if they fight me about school. We're going to do mom bucks or chores also. So they will get a mom buck per chore that they do without complaining.

I love Math U See and sometimes my son drags his feet and whines. If you did the assesment testing on the MUS site and it put her in Delta then I'd stay n Delta. You just have to find a currency to get your child willing to do her work.

HTH
mem82
by Platinum Member on Apr. 8, 2014 at 8:54 PM

Do you think it is a Math problem or is it a discipline problem?

SamMom912
by Member on Apr. 8, 2014 at 9:15 PM
1 mom liked this

I think we all fight and fuss when things are too hard.. im guessing she is frustrated. perhaps you should let her weigh in on the issue. ask if this feels too hard? What the issues are.. See if you can pinpoint what the problem is and see if you can solve it. 

Im doubting its discipline if she is doing other subjects without fussing. 

You mention this is your first year HSing. has she had difficulty with math before? Has this been a problem when she was in other schools? 

As someone with a math phobia and nonverbal learning disability, math was my nemisis.. Poor foundation in the subject, scattered skills and a frustrated kid makes for lots of fighting.. LOL.. That was me. I feel for your little girl..hugs... Wishing you the best. 

TJandKarasMom
by Debbie on Apr. 8, 2014 at 9:19 PM

I actually don't mind math.  It comes easy to me, but definitely does not to her.  She does not give DH a hard time at all, so this may be an idea.  Maybe even just letting him "assign" and "correct" her work...as she watches the DVD on her own (me teaching her did not work at all!)

Quoting TidewaterClan: This is me thinking not criticizing at all, so never think that please. Do you like math? Are you excited/happy or already frustrated when you begin? Is it easier for her to give you a hard time than your hubs? Any chance he could be her math teacher & it would be any different?


TJandKarasMom
by Debbie on Apr. 8, 2014 at 9:21 PM

I am liking your ideas a lot.  My kids get 2 hours of tech time if they get their schoolwork done.  I like assigning a time limit and taking extra minutes used off of tech time.  I also really like the idea of her correcting her own math.  We have the teach manual with answers, so that is easy enough for her to do.  I think I may try this tomorrow and see if it helps.  Maybe if she marks her own stuff she won't be as offended and angry.

Thanks for the ideas!!

Quoting No_Difference:

my daughter is 9 and we're doing that book this year too. The only difference is, Jamie loves math,  BUT she still likes to drag her feet horribly at times. We made a "contract" which applies to all school work, but it has helped tremendously. She gets an hour of "tech time" - but it could be anything at all that she likes doing - at the start of every day. Each subject gets a certain amount of time. I allotted 1/2 hr for math, even though she gets it done in 15 minutes typically. If she goes over the 1/2 hr, she loses time from her hour - how ever much longer it took her. If she finishes faster, then she gets the remainder time added to her hour. That way, it is entirely on her. Also, I started letting Jamie check her answer with a different color pen, so I was no longer the bad guy. Then we'd go over on the board the ones she did wrong. She'd show me how she did the problem, and we'd discuss where she went astray. It has helped with the attitude immensely!


TJandKarasMom
by Debbie on Apr. 8, 2014 at 9:24 PM

I think it's a little of both.  She is definitely pushing the boundaries a lot at this age (it is incredibly trying as a parent!) but it's the worst with math.  Almost everything else is done fairly easily without a lot of complaints.  Math is a touchy subject.

I don't think it helps that DS is advanced in math and breezes through whatever work he has.  He is also much more focused and gets schoolwork done quickly to move on to free time.  It doesn't help when she sees him getting math easily (even though he is older) and finishing earlier than her. 

Quoting mem82:

Do you think it is a Math problem or is it a discipline problem?


TJandKarasMom
by Debbie on Apr. 8, 2014 at 9:28 PM
1 mom liked this

Thanks for this.  She has never enjoyed math.  The program they used in ps was AWFUL for her.  It was spiral, and she really needs mastery.  Spiral just moved too fast for her, she didn't have enough time to really learn something before they moved on to the next topic.  She also definitely had some anxiety things going on at school, and she wouldn't ask for help.  So she would come home with math homework (that was typically the only homework in elementary school) and wouldn't have any idea how to do it.  Even though I *know* the teacher taught it that day...so I would have to reteach her before she could do the homework. 

I don't think she thinks it's too hard, when I said we could go back a level or even just review the previous lessons in this book, she was very much against both of those ideas.  She wants to do this level, she just doesn't want to ever be wrong.

Quoting SamMom912:

I think we all fight and fuss when things are too hard.. im guessing she is frustrated. perhaps you should let her weigh in on the issue. ask if this feels too hard? What the issues are.. See if you can pinpoint what the problem is and see if you can solve it. 

Im doubting its discipline if she is doing other subjects without fussing. 

You mention this is your first year HSing. has she had difficulty with math before? Has this been a problem when she was in other schools? 

As someone with a math phobia and nonverbal learning disability, math was my nemisis.. Poor foundation in the subject, scattered skills and a frustrated kid makes for lots of fighting.. LOL.. That was me. I feel for your little girl..hugs... Wishing you the best. 


KrissyKC
by Silver Member on Apr. 8, 2014 at 10:45 PM
1 mom liked this
My older kids are pretty mathmatical. However, we had our daily battles when we used other curriculum. Saxon, Rod & Staff, Time4learning.com, Bob Jones....

They all were so much tears and frustration from two kids who naturally took to math.

I switched to MUS just like you did and had the option same as you...between Gamma and Delta. My son was going into 4th grade, which would have been Delta if he had done MUS all the way through.

He had a pretty good grasp on the hows and whys of multiplication, but was far from mastering it.

We chose to step back instead of fwd.

He absolutely looooved it. The entire book. Not just the ubber easy stuff at the beginning.

Anyway, we graded it all and he ended up with a 96% for the overall grade. He finished it in late January. We gave him a little over a month off before buying delta. He only did online math games occassionally so he wouldn't forget.

When delta came, he jumped around rejoicing and begged to start that day.

He is only in the first 10 lessons...


Long story short, it was VERY WORTH stepping back.
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