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Homeschooling Moms Homeschooling Moms

I throw up my hands in defeat

Posted by on Apr. 24, 2014 at 5:48 PM
  • 16 Replies

 I give up. Our co-op is driving me bonkers. Our co-op is designed for kids 13 and under. We've been members for 5 years now. My kids love it. I HATE it. I teach classes, which are successful (for older kids, little ones give me hives). A few years ago I agreed to do the 'director' stuff because I'm good with a computer and am organized. I don't see why a director needs to be available all day every day at co-op. But apparently it's to hold the mom's hands and boss them around. Personally, I think if everyone acts like a grown-up then all will be good.

Tuesday I had to remain at the end of the day, in order to clean up the poop some kid had smeared ALL over the bathroom. And I do mean alllllll over. So, I sent out (another) email asking parents to please keep track of their little ones, again remainding them that the policy is that all children under 7 need an adult with them all day, in every class. And that families with more than one child need to communicate with the teachers. Since our teachers are parents, they don't feel comfortable leaving the class to go searching for a wayward parent.

Of course no one took credit for poop-gate. Insead I get a call from one of the moms about our end of day play class for the preschoolers. It's meant to just give the youngest members something to do while the older kids finish their final classes of the day. The original teacher quit after the 4th day. Which I can understand since children under age 7 make me crazy..lol..but I didn't understand when she said these kids don't listen. In my mind barely any child that age (and it was a class for the under 6 y/o's) will 'listen'. But this week we got a new parent in there as the ring leader....er...teacher. And apparently she was traumatized as well. Mostly because there is one family that has 2 children in the class. The mom sits in on the class with her youngest (an infant), but apparently doesn't step in if her children are running about like little mental patients. When asked this week she nodded her head vaguely and said something like, "kids will be kids". This horrified many moms aparently and made them question her compentency.

Though I don't get why they are surprised. See, I watch 19 kids and counting with equal parts amazement & horror (the horror is trying to put mysef in her shoes of course..lol.) So when the mom's were concerned that this mother isn't altogether there, I just gently reminded them that she has 13 kids....she probably just didn't recognize those two..lol...I feel like I have dementia after 2, so it makes sense to me?

So I guess I don't appreciate the problem, but aside from the email I sent this week reminding everyone to keep eyes on their own, I'm not sure whatelse everyone expects. What would you do?

by on Apr. 24, 2014 at 5:48 PM
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Replies (1-10):
jen2150
by Silver Member on Apr. 24, 2014 at 6:46 PM
How many families are in the co-op and how many people helping do you have? Are you the only leader?


A few months ago I quit my co-op and returned. I asked someone to help me organize and that helped a lot. We have been having trouble getting people to communicate better and showing up for weeks with no communication. Honestly I would set up a meeting and let everyone know the issues. I think you need some people to handle some of the parents so you are not doing it all. Would it help to limit the class sizes more. I would also let people know that kids need to behave a certain way or they won't be allowed to continue. I don't care how many kids you have they need to know how to behave properly. Do the parents have required service hours? One of my co-ops is large and requires service hours of all the parents. The parents should not be coming to one person for everything.
paganbaby
by Silver Member on Apr. 24, 2014 at 7:27 PM

I feel crazy just reading this! lol

debramommyof4
by Silver Member on Apr. 24, 2014 at 11:22 PM
If you have someone go in and be organized with a plan and not a free for all it will be less crazy.
mem82
by Platinum Member on Apr. 25, 2014 at 9:19 AM
Poop on the walls. Someone had to know which kid that was because they'd have the evidence on their hands. Maybe a hall monitor?
KickButtMama
by Shannon on Apr. 25, 2014 at 9:39 AM

Exactly, some mom would have gotten in the car and the evidence would have been all over the kid. But I heard not a word of , I'm so sorry Johnny was so embarassed. Whatever. 

Quoting mem82: Poop on the walls. Someone had to know which kid that was because they'd have the evidence on their hands. Maybe a hall monitor?


KickButtMama
by Shannon on Apr. 25, 2014 at 9:44 AM


Quoting debramommyof4: If you have someone go in and be organized with a plan and not a free for all it will be less crazy.

See, we have Hall parents who are basically like Hal monitors who are supposed to make sure there are no random kids walking around....smeared in poop....when I sent my email this week the hall monitor replied that she "hadn't seen anything amiss" even though the second I opened my door I immediately heard kids egging eachother on to go in there, and a couple of moms saying "I'm not cleaning that up, that's gross"  

i had a co-director whose job it was was to be available and around. She didn't teach (except for that one class at the end of the day) but she up and quit with no notice by the 4th class....which left me with no visible authority figure. Grrr. I have another mom who will be taking up that torch next week, so maybe it will get better.

KickButtMama
by Shannon on Apr. 25, 2014 at 9:45 AM

See!?!? My DH was no help since as I told the story he laughed so hard he had tears in his eyes. But, he hates co-op and can't understand why I go back. Smh

Quoting paganbaby:

I feel crazy just reading this! lol


KickButtMama
by Shannon on Apr. 25, 2014 at 9:54 AM

We have around 45 families. We are pretty relaxed on enforcing the manditory parent participation since many moms have babies and that can make it difficult, I guess, to participate in service hours. So we have about 10 parents who teach (I am teaching 4 classes) and we have a digital clipboard that sends reminders to parents who sign up to be hall parents, room set up/clean up, etc. 

I've sent several emails this semester (I think this is the third) reminding parents that they need to be in charge of their own children. We have a Lego club for the youngsters as well (it's not a class per se) and we had had an issue with parents just dropping the kids off and leaving. I sent an email and that fixed the problem. We don't usually have issues with classes. It's the moms with youngsters who don't do classes that seem to have the problem. You know....except for the wildly traumatic toddler class. 

Quoting jen2150: How many families are in the co-op and how many people helping do you have? Are you the only leader? A few months ago I quit my co-op and returned. I asked someone to help me organize and that helped a lot. We have been having trouble getting people to communicate better and showing up for weeks with no communication. Honestly I would set up a meeting and let everyone know the issues. I think you need some people to handle some of the parents so you are not doing it all. Would it help to limit the class sizes more. I would also let people know that kids need to behave a certain way or they won't be allowed to continue. I don't care how many kids you have they need to know how to behave properly. Do the parents have required service hours? One of my co-ops is large and requires service hours of all the parents. The parents should not be coming to one person for everything.


jen2150
by Silver Member on Apr. 25, 2014 at 10:02 AM
Maybe sibling care could work. One of my co-ops has sibling care which we pay a certain amount per month. Parents sign their kids in and out. Next year at orientation I would definately take a good deal of the time to discuss this problem. Maybe consequences for not keeping track of your kids. I think homeschoolers sometimes are so independent they sometimes forget how to act in a group. We are used to doing our own time. I think need to realize if they can't follow the rules then maybe this co-op isn't right for them.

Quoting KickButtMama:

We have around 45 families. We are pretty relaxed on enforcing the manditory parent participation since many moms have babies and that can make it difficult, I guess, to participate in service hours. So we have about 10 parents who teach (I am teaching 4 classes) and we have a digital clipboard that sends reminders to parents who sign up to be hall parents, room set up/clean up, etc. 

I've sent several emails this semester (I think this is the third) reminding parents that they need to be in charge of their own children. We have a Lego club for the youngsters as well (it's not a class per se) and we had had an issue with parents just dropping the kids off and leaving. I sent an email and that fixed the problem. We don't usually have issues with classes. It's the moms with youngsters who don't do classes that seem to have the problem. You know....except for the wildly traumatic toddler class. 

Quoting jen2150: How many families are in the co-op and how many people helping do you have? Are you the only leader?


A few months ago I quit my co-op and returned. I asked someone to help me organize and that helped a lot. We have been having trouble getting people to communicate better and showing up for weeks with no communication. Honestly I would set up a meeting and let everyone know the issues. I think you need some people to handle some of the parents so you are not doing it all. Would it help to limit the class sizes more. I would also let people know that kids need to behave a certain way or they won't be allowed to continue. I don't care how many kids you have they need to know how to behave properly. Do the parents have required service hours? One of my co-ops is large and requires service hours of all the parents. The parents should not be coming to one person for everything.

KickButtMama
by Shannon on Apr. 25, 2014 at 10:08 AM

Yes, I completely agree. We made sure, this semester, that we had activities in every class period for the youngest siblings - supervised play time, Lego, preschool fun and the ever traumatic movement class. This was because in previous semesters we had issues with the toddlers damaging the building we rent! I like your explanation of the independance of homeschoolers vs my explanation of them using us as an unpaid daycare...lol..

Quoting jen2150: Maybe sibling care could work. One of my co-ops has sibling care which we pay a certain amount per month. Parents sign their kids in and out. Next year at orientation I would definately take a good deal of the time to discuss this problem. Maybe consequences for not keeping track of your kids. I think homeschoolers sometimes are so independent they sometimes forget how to act in a group. We are used to doing our own time. I think need to realize if they can't follow the rules then maybe this co-op isn't right for them.
Quoting KickButtMama:

We have around 45 families. We are pretty relaxed on enforcing the manditory parent participation since many moms have babies and that can make it difficult, I guess, to participate in service hours. So we have about 10 parents who teach (I am teaching 4 classes) and we have a digital clipboard that sends reminders to parents who sign up to be hall parents, room set up/clean up, etc. 

I've sent several emails this semester (I think this is the third) reminding parents that they need to be in charge of their own children. We have a Lego club for the youngsters as well (it's not a class per se) and we had had an issue with parents just dropping the kids off and leaving. I sent an email and that fixed the problem. We don't usually have issues with classes. It's the moms with youngsters who don't do classes that seem to have the problem. You know....except for the wildly traumatic toddler class. 

Quoting jen2150: How many families are in the co-op and how many people helping do you have? Are you the only leader? A few months ago I quit my co-op and returned. I asked someone to help me organize and that helped a lot. We have been having trouble getting people to communicate better and showing up for weeks with no communication. Honestly I would set up a meeting and let everyone know the issues. I think you need some people to handle some of the parents so you are not doing it all. Would it help to limit the class sizes more. I would also let people know that kids need to behave a certain way or they won't be allowed to continue. I don't care how many kids you have they need to know how to behave properly. Do the parents have required service hours? One of my co-ops is large and requires service hours of all the parents. The parents should not be coming to one person for everything.


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