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What Changed Your Mind About Homeschooling

Posted by on Jan. 23, 2016 at 8:44 PM
  • 21 Replies

Some of you have ALWAYS wanted to homeschool.  This question is not for you.  This is for the others...who, for whatever reason, always pictured their children going off to school (and maybe even started off sending them to school). Maybe you didn't think homeschooling was a good idea, or you thought it was great for some people, but not for you. 

So, if you once thought you would never homeschool...but now do, what changed your mind? 

(I will leave my own answer to that in a comment below as well).

by on Jan. 23, 2016 at 8:44 PM
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Scribbleprints
by Group Admin on Jan. 23, 2016 at 8:50 PM

Many of you have already read about my reasons for homeschooling, after thinking I never would,  so you can skip this post  (in fact, I just copy pasted this from where I recently answered why I homescool my youngest but not my older two...it's what made me think of asking the question above.  And it's kinda long...sorry). 

----

I really never considered homeschooling with my older kids.  I always thought homescooling would be isolating (just couldn't picture myself being happy doing it).   I missed my work after choosing to stay home after my second was born, 19 months after my first (for financial reasons...my job didn't pay more than childcare for both).    I wanted to work outside the home once all my kids were grown.   Plus, my youngest was born right before my oldest started Kindergarten...so I was looking forward to some quiet time with my two youngest (my oldest has a really dynamic, extroverted loud personality...and honestly him going to school and getting out that energy with his classmates brought some sanity to our home). 

Our schools were good and my kids seemed to be thriving there.  But I always thought if that wasn't the case...if there was some reason my kids needed it, I'd suck it up and homeschool.

Then my third went off to Kindergarten...and after the first week, until the very end of that first year, cried every day before school.  In spite of seeming to genuinly like his teacher, he hated school.  He had not shown the same interest that my older kids had in letters and writing and reading, but he had at least been drawing pictures and attempting letters with a little prodding at home.  At school, for the first few months all he would do was scribble.  He progressed at a snails pace.  The teacher started bringing us in for conferences about his progress.

After trying all sorts of things to help him and getting no where (he was so burnt out after school trying to do "extra" work to catch him up was futile), towards the end of the year I knew he'd be asked to repeat (they did suggest it...though said it was our choice).  I knew this wasn't working so I started looking into private schools...which were both too expensive, and seemed to be even more academic pressure than public schools.  I knew he needed something gentle, playful, and at his own pace...because the main problem wasn't "catching up" but not having any motivation to try, and hating everything to do with school or learning.

So, that left homeschool.  It has gone wonderfully.  We haven't caught up, but we've progressed at about the same rate he would have if he had repeated (and then progressed normally for his grade).  And without the tears.    His attitude towards school has changed dramatically. 

And I, surprisingly, I enjoy it.  I don't feel isolated.  It feels purposeful, and I enjoy it just as much as I did working outside the home.

Bethbeth
by Member on Jan. 23, 2016 at 10:45 PM

My husband wanted to homeschool and I said no.

Now we are homeschooling :)

I started researching it, and just found SO many reasons to do it. We are loving it so far.

mcginnisc
by Member on Jan. 23, 2016 at 11:00 PM

My girls started in private school. They were happy and thriving. We decided to pull them as we are going to China and we did not want to deal with the school as well as bank the tuition. Public school has never been an option in our area. 

We are only going to homeschool for one more year and then we are moving and will be in one of the top districts in our state so they will go to public school starting in middle school for our oldest. 

I have my days when I love it and days when I hate it. 

Claire


" I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13 

msb64
by on Jan. 24, 2016 at 3:52 AM

I absolutely never considered that I would be a homeschooler.  My family has been living overseas for the past 12 years and our DD has had the opportunity to go to really high quality international schools and just recently graduated with her IB diploma.  It actually never occurred to us that our DS wouldn't have an equally rich experience.  But when our son was 4 years old we were concerned about his social, emotional development as well as his ability to learn.  We took him back to the US for a full PE exam and he was diagnosed with ASD and ADHD.  This diagnosis made it impossible to find an international school that would accept him as a student.  So our choices were to either return to the US or continue our adventures overseas as a partial homeschooling family.  We chose the latter.

It has been a fun journey but not without challenges.  I gave up my career which took some adjusting.  We have been able to put together an effective schooling solution at every post but it takes a lot of time and effort, only to have to start over again at the next posting.  We have also relied on a team of professionals to help us with our homeschooling program.  DS and I spend on average 6-8 hours a week on Skype!  Our son has really blossomed academically but is suffering socially and emotionally by not having a "peer group", especially as a 13 year old.  After much soul searching, our kids and I are returning to the US this Spring while my DH goes to his next posting in a war zone.  Our DD will be starting college (yeah!)  and we have found are really fantastic, small, inclusive private school for our DS (double yeah!).


kmeow
by Member on Jan. 24, 2016 at 8:20 AM
1 mom liked this
My husband is in the military and plans to keep on for the next million years. When I was pregnant with my daughter we lived in a super ghetto area and we were thinking we wouldn't want to send her to school there, so that's how the homeschool conversation got brought up for us. We figure even if only half the places we could end up have horrible schools (that's being really, really generous), we would probably be better off homeschooling for the sake of continuity of education. Especially with High school, it seems like most mil families I know either do online or put roots down while the service member geobaches, and those aren't options that my family loves.
Of course, my daughter is still 1.5 years away from even starting preschool, but I'm a researchy type, and I want to make sure that if I'm going to do something that will effect her for the rest of her life, that I am super well informed and prepared.
Molimomma
by Bronze Member on Jan. 24, 2016 at 8:50 AM

When I was pregnant I assumed DS would go to school "with" me when I returned to teaching when he got to be school age but DS has sensory issues that made EVERYTHING(especially potty training) much more difficult and he was also very bright and sucked up everything like a spong when it came to math & science. I started teaching him at the age of 2 literally to keep him busy and save my sanity because he was so busy and bored. We started with basics like colors and numbers and by 4 he had mastered pretty much every kindergarten level thing I owned but still wasn't fully potty trained! Now he's just turned 6 and we are doing well with first grade work and now I have NO desire to return to the classroom and teach public school anyway so it all worked out for the best. Moving away from developmentally appropriate teaching and endless rating ruined my desire to teach public school and with DS issues I knew it wouldn't be a good fit for him. Both of us are happier at home!

GodsAmiga
by Bronze Member on Jan. 24, 2016 at 10:07 AM

I was homeschooled until 5th grade and loved it so I have never been against homeschooling. However, I have never considered myself smart enough or a good enough teacher (I used to confuse my poor kiddos when trying to teach them how to play a board game-lol!) When my oldest was pre-k age we lived in Japan and she was begging to go to school. First I found a pre-k off base (owned and run by Americans). After the first day she would freak out about going. After a week I went to drop her off and she was clinging to me so hard that I literally couldn't pry her arms off of me. I realized that this was more than just not wanting to be separated from me. It was a red flag. I got her out but she wouldn't tell me why she had been so scared. She still said she wanted to go to school so I enrolled her in pre-k at the base school. She went all that year but hated it. The first day of school the teacher wouldn't let her inside the building because she was too shy to say "hello" to the teacher. 20 minutes outside the building, another 20 minutes outside the classroom door. All because she wouldn't say "hello" to someone she didn't know (at 4 years old). That should have made me take her out then and there but she enjoyed having friends there. She was extremely popular (her teachers told me the other kids would fight at circle time over who got to sit next to her). She loved the assistant teacher! She didn't learn anything, though, and the main teacher just kept going with her overbearing attitude. Rachel hated school because of her. The teacher also did things like insist that my dd's vision had gotten worse (she has a lazy eye) because her peripheal vision wasn't as good as the other kids' (it was actually because when she looked to the side her vision wasn't as clear because the glasses don't cover that area of sight). She went on and on about it day after day. I took Rachel in because it was time for her yearly check-up and I mentioned what the teacher was saying. The eye doctor laughed, agreed with me, and then told me that her vision had actually improved a little bit since the last time she was in. Anyways, during all these issues I had friends with kiddos in the kindergarten classes. I came to find out that half the children are "diagnosed" with ADD and ADHD because they can't sit still at that age. It was also an all-day kindergarten, 5 days a week, with only one recess every day that was 20 minutes and had to include the kids eating their lunches as well (and the teachers wondered why the kids couldn't sit still!). I knew that I did not want my dd spending all day every day sitting in a classroom. Then, at the mid year parent conference, the pre-k teacher tried to tell that my daughter shouldn't go into kindergarten because she was too young and not ready academically wise (she was mature enough to go though, she said). I began considering homeschooling. By the end of the year Rachel was crying every morning about going to school. She also finally told me why she had been scared of that other pre-k. If a child didn't eat all of their lunch the teacher would slap their hands with a ruler. I made up my mind. I would attempt to homeschool. I figured kindergarten was a perfect time to find out if I could do it or not. :-) First off, one of the things the pre-k teacher told me was that my daughter, because of her "vision" problem was un-coordinated and wouldn't be able to do certain things. I wanted to write a letter to her that summer when my then 4 year old began riding a two-wheeler bicycle. Lol! Take that, teacher! Lol! Kindergarten year we did school for a hour-two at the max-each day...we took a TON of days off...and we finished the year in April. I also only focused on reading, writing, and math. When we finished I was told that she was ahead of the other kindergarteners in the public school and ahead of where they would be at the end of the year. I'd been told by that teacher that my daughter wouldn't be able to learn how to read because she supposedly didn't know her letters (she did but I discovered later on that she has dyslexia so she would get her letters backwards and mixed up when doing puzzles and things in the class). She was reading at a high first grade level by the end of that year. She's 7 now and reads at 4th to 5th grade level. :-) I still want to write that letter to the teacher just to show her what my child accomplished when she enjoyed school. Anyways, we were moving in the middle of 1st grade so I decided to at least school through 1st grade. Now we're in her 2nd grade year and I'm homeschooling my second in kindergarten. I'm planning out next year's curriculum and beginning to research for my son's kindergarten year in case he doesn't begin talking by then. When I think of school for my 4th I still see myself homeschooling all 4 of them. :-) My husband isn't as supportive as I wish he was but he is allowing it since our kids say they want to stay homeschooled. :-)

Pukalani79
by Bronze Member on Jan. 24, 2016 at 11:58 AM
Our intent was to homeschool just for one year because we were moving the following year. However, when it came time for him to go to public school, he made it a month before we realized he was bored out of his mind and we pulled him again. Later we would try private and then public school. For health reasons we pulled my girls, then for bullying issues, we pulled my son. I never thought negatively about homeschooling, it just wasn't something I knew anything about, and later when life happened, it wasn't something we were able to continue. Now that I have them all home again, I know it's the best thing for us.
Scribbleprints
by Group Admin on Jan. 24, 2016 at 4:07 PM

I have heard so many teachers I know say this, or something similar...about the schools moving away from developmentally appropriate work for kids.  I really started looking into this after my experience with my youngest.  My oldest two were sort of like your child...just sucked everything up, and since they've always been grade levels ahead I never noticed how early the academic pressure started until my youngest, who wasn't precocious in reading like the other two, started KG.  Our kindergarten teacher told us she wanted to do more "play based learning" in class but were discouraged from that by the administration.  That's just sad. 

Quoting Molimomma:

When I was pregnant I assumed DS would go to school "with" me when I returned to teaching when he got to be school age but DS has sensory issues that made EVERYTHING(especially potty training) much more difficult and he was also very bright and sucked up everything like a spong when it came to math & science. I started teaching him at the age of 2 literally to keep him busy and save my sanity because he was so busy and bored. We started with basics like colors and numbers and by 4 he had mastered pretty much every kindergarten level thing I owned but still wasn't fully potty trained! Now he's just turned 6 and we are doing well with first grade work and now I have NO desire to return to the classroom and teach public school anyway so it all worked out for the best. Moving away from developmentally appropriate teaching and endless rating ruined my desire to teach public school and with DS issues I knew it wouldn't be a good fit for him. Both of us are happier at home!


Scribbleprints
by Group Admin on Jan. 24, 2016 at 4:22 PM

Just curious...did you think of pre-k as just an automatic part of school?  When I was growing up in California, I did go to pre-school for a while, but it was basically for day-care.  The only reason anyone went to pre-k was if both their parents worked.  Most of my friends didn't start any kind of school until Kindergarten. 

I remember when my oldest was young people asking me what pre-k I was going to send him to, like it was assumed I would.  This was before I was even considering homeschool.  And some of the people sending their children to pre-K weren't working outside the home (they were home with their younger kids so it wasn't because they needed to send them to work--it just seemed like it was assumed that kids would go to pre-K).   

Quoting GodsAmiga:

I was homeschooled until 5th grade and loved it so I have never been against homeschooling. However, I have never considered myself smart enough or a good enough teacher (I used to confuse my poor kiddos when trying to teach them how to play a board game-lol!) When my oldest was pre-k age we lived in Japan and she was begging to go to school. First I found a pre-k off base (owned and run by Americans). After the first day she would freak out about going. After a week I went to drop her off and she was clinging to me so hard that I literally couldn't pry her arms off of me. I realized that this was more than just not wanting to be separated from me. It was a red flag. I got her out but she wouldn't tell me why she had been so scared. She still said she wanted to go to school so I enrolled her in pre-k at the base school. She went all that year but hated it. The first day of school the teacher wouldn't let her inside the building because she was too shy to say "hello" to the teacher. 20 minutes outside the building, another 20 minutes outside the classroom door. All because she wouldn't say "hello" to someone she didn't know (at 4 years old). That should have made me take her out then and there but she enjoyed having friends there. She was extremely popular (her teachers told me the other kids would fight at circle time over who got to sit next to her). She loved the assistant teacher! She didn't learn anything, though, and the main teacher just kept going with her overbearing attitude. Rachel hated school because of her. The teacher also did things like insist that my dd's vision had gotten worse (she has a lazy eye) because her peripheal vision wasn't as good as the other kids' (it was actually because when she looked to the side her vision wasn't as clear because the glasses don't cover that area of sight). She went on and on about it day after day. I took Rachel in because it was time for her yearly check-up and I mentioned what the teacher was saying. The eye doctor laughed, agreed with me, and then told me that her vision had actually improved a little bit since the last time she was in. Anyways, during all these issues I had friends with kiddos in the kindergarten classes. I came to find out that half the children are "diagnosed" with ADD and ADHD because they can't sit still at that age. It was also an all-day kindergarten, 5 days a week, with only one recess every day that was 20 minutes and had to include the kids eating their lunches as well (and the teachers wondered why the kids couldn't sit still!). I knew that I did not want my dd spending all day every day sitting in a classroom. Then, at the mid year parent conference, the pre-k teacher tried to tell that my daughter shouldn't go into kindergarten because she was too young and not ready academically wise (she was mature enough to go though, she said). I began considering homeschooling. By the end of the year Rachel was crying every morning about going to school. She also finally told me why she had been scared of that other pre-k. If a child didn't eat all of their lunch the teacher would slap their hands with a ruler. I made up my mind. I would attempt to homeschool. I figured kindergarten was a perfect time to find out if I could do it or not. :-) First off, one of the things the pre-k teacher told me was that my daughter, because of her "vision" problem was un-coordinated and wouldn't be able to do certain things. I wanted to write a letter to her that summer when my then 4 year old began riding a two-wheeler bicycle. Lol! Take that, teacher! Lol! Kindergarten year we did school for a hour-two at the max-each day...we took a TON of days off...and we finished the year in April. I also only focused on reading, writing, and math. When we finished I was told that she was ahead of the other kindergarteners in the public school and ahead of where they would be at the end of the year. I'd been told by that teacher that my daughter wouldn't be able to learn how to read because she supposedly didn't know her letters (she did but I discovered later on that she has dyslexia so she would get her letters backwards and mixed up when doing puzzles and things in the class). She was reading at a high first grade level by the end of that year. She's 7 now and reads at 4th to 5th grade level. :-) I still want to write that letter to the teacher just to show her what my child accomplished when she enjoyed school. Anyways, we were moving in the middle of 1st grade so I decided to at least school through 1st grade. Now we're in her 2nd grade year and I'm homeschooling my second in kindergarten. I'm planning out next year's curriculum and beginning to research for my son's kindergarten year in case he doesn't begin talking by then. When I think of school for my 4th I still see myself homeschooling all 4 of them. :-) My husband isn't as supportive as I wish he was but he is allowing it since our kids say they want to stay homeschooled. :-)


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