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Mommy blues. Positive words needed.

Posted by on Oct. 18, 2012 at 2:01 AM
  • 13 Replies
2 moms liked this
I am a mother of a 6 month old and have been bombarded with a hefty tug of war issue.

In Late march I resigned from my company to relax before Lici came along. Everything was fine financially at home and as of lately its been hard having ends meet. My husband works nights shifts, as if that weren't another issue already & I now am going back and forth on the debate of returning to work. I will admit, I do have a little separation anxiety that I cant seem to shake because for the past 6 months I have been the only one caring for my daughter and daddy steps in when he can. The big issue is.... I cant find work. I take charge of making sure all bills are paid on time and pretty much all finances. I know that we are falling behind and have noticed that the constant need for money is becoming a strain on our relationship. I want to help but have been in a huge funk because of all the online applications and resumes I have sent out and no calls yet. Its been a few weeks and am at the end of my rope it seems. I don't expect for a mom to magically snap her fingers and fix my problems but I am optimistic of positive mommy feedback.
Thanks for reading!!!
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by on Oct. 18, 2012 at 2:01 AM
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Replies (1-10):
by Member on Oct. 18, 2012 at 12:47 PM
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 Will the Company you worked for keep you in mind if something comes up? And instead of applying online-do it in person. I hope you find something soon hun.

by on Oct. 18, 2012 at 1:11 PM
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One thing at at time, momma.

by Amy on Oct. 18, 2012 at 3:38 PM

That's a good idea, talk to your old company.  As long as you didn't burn any bridges when you left they may consider you for rehire.

Quoting peacemom28:

 Will the Company you worked for keep you in mind if something comes up? And instead of applying online-do it in person. I hope you find something soon hun.

by New Member on Oct. 19, 2012 at 2:05 AM
Hey cupcakemommy12 I completely understand the want and need to pitch in financially and the stress it can impose on both partners, one not realizing the others. I'm not sure how urgent your need to help financially is but remember: With all things be patient, patience is bitter but sweet is its fruit, what's meant for you will be yours!
The suggestion to touch base with your previous employer in a GREAT one. I can't see any reason why they wouldn't consider rehiring you if there was no underline issue during your resignation. So that's definitely a good start however, the thought of going into places to apply is a logical one but the fact of my opinion is that 95% of whom ever you get to speak with on site will send you to the companies website (unless its a small, up and coming company)to apply or the in store application station (which will still be some form of electronic application). I have a question for you: Have you ever considered working from home? There is a vast array of legitimate work from home positions available. Today a good amount of customer service calls are routed to someone who's more then likely in there PJ's and slippers at home. VIPDESK and LIVEOPS are good starting points. I've also stumbled upon a finance article that has legit work from home jobs listed by field of interest (making the task of finding a right fit less burdensome) That way you'll not only be doing your part but you'll also be able to stay home with Lici and that nixes the whole slight separation issue. One last thing if you think you maybe more entrepreneurial minded have you ever considered owning your own home based business? For a small to moderate franchise fee you could very well become a business owner and still be able to be home with your family! Those are just some options to consider. I'd be more then happy to share those sites with you via message (don't want to break any rules) Happy Friday!!

Eurianya B.

by Member on Oct. 19, 2012 at 8:20 AM
1 mom liked this

keep trying, also do follow up calls and emails to places you have applied, it can help you stick out in their mind.  as for money issues, re-map out the budget and bills, of you dont already use cupons i sugest  trying to use those now, every bit helps even if its finding ones for soaps  and cleaners ect that you regularly buy. you could also go the home made route with cleaners! home made laundry soaps, home made bathroom and surface cleaners ect  most are natural and would pose no health risk to kids ect (vinegar and water for windows ect) do not let money come between you and dh. most  couples have different spending and saving styles. me and my dh are savers yet im even more ridgid with buying or not buying  even tiny things, where hes  like why not splurge and buy a candy bar ect lol. i mainly handle following bills cycles get them paid ontime, keeping track of balance and what bill is coming next, how much money to put in for gas wityh cars ect. we bicker still at times. but we are a family of 4 living on 2200 a month.... that is not much. i was on wic for 2 months near end of pregnancy, but at 38 week ultrasond  there was no heartbeat, we had to go up to city to do still birth vbac. no hospitals even county one would touch me they refused me help due to  drs insurance companie refuseing to cover drs if they  took care of me, they would risk their liscince.  at wic appointment yesterday, they insisted i should stay on wic another 6 months for my health, they were also kind and gave us a number for a shrink  who is free and has experieance helping families who have lost a baby.   we are not on food stamps but qualify for them, we are debating applying now or going to food banks this month as cost of cremation for emma rose and trips back and forth to city in gas have wiped us out big time, luckily we rent from my dad and he understood that the rent money was gone to gas and her cremation this month. my being the only of my 5 sibblings to ever borrow money and always pay back , he knows he will  be paid  even if it takes longer, other siblings  have borrowed 10s of thousands from my parents and they never saw a cent back. my parents cover other siblings bills each month too, dont get rent  or anything and they also ask my parentds for money still each month. im only one who has been independent, paid our own bills ourselves, and had always made sure we paid rent for the house every single month  ontime and in full. i dotn get how  a 40 yr old sibling cant do it when they have 6k per month income....

 things were tight every week making it prior to losing our daughter emma rose, now of course even tighter. im not sure exactly what we will do but its looking like we will have to suck up our pride and look to the system we have paid into   so many years to help us get back on our feet.

by Jennifer on Oct. 19, 2012 at 9:42 AM

I have always found it easier to drop off a resume rather than doing everything online. It's just more personal.

by on Oct. 19, 2012 at 11:09 AM

Good luck, that is a stressful situation. What line of work were you in before the baby?

by on Oct. 19, 2012 at 1:42 PM

Yes, do it in person for starters.  And definitely talk to your former employers. Every mom contemplating (or knowing she has to) a return to work feels the tug of separation anxiety.  In our case my husband started a business at home so he could care for her initially so that made it easier.  I knew we'd need my income and took only a leave of absence but it still hurt to leave her.  You're not alone!

by on Oct. 21, 2012 at 4:34 AM
Try to keep in mind that the economy is tough. It took my mom 8 months to find a job, so don't give up!
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by Angie on Oct. 21, 2012 at 9:16 PM

sounds like you are overwhelmed, you need some time to youreslf so get a babysitter and go out buy yourself, even if it isto get your hair done....You need to relax!

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