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*Pregnant 15 yo* Was her mom right to say this? Edit in Red.

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Poll

Question: Do you feel the mom was right in saying that?

Options:

Yes. It's true. If she wants to be a mom she needs to take complete and unrealistic responsibility for her burden.

No. I don't feel that's fair at all.

I think that some responsibilty is good. But what the mom is asking is unreasonable.


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 219

View Results

In response to questions, I contacted my aunt who knows the family, today. The update from her is that the mom will not allow her daughter to get on any type of assistance. She is of the mind that you take care of your own and don't live off the government. She has always paid her own way and she expects her daughter to do no less. Schools with free daycare is off the table too. She will not coddle her and let her take the easy way out.

There's a 15 year old girl. She got pregnant by her boyfriend who skipped out soon after. And she hid the pregnancy from her parents until it was too late for an abortion.Now she's 6 months pregnant and her mom is pushing hard for adoption. She has her whole life ahead of her, she doesn't need to be saddled with a baby, yada, yada, yada. But the girl really wants to keep her baby.So finally this is what the mom said,

Mom: "Okay." "You want to keep you baby?" "You take care of him all the time." "I will not be a babysitter." "I raised my baby, now it's your turn."

Daughter: "But what about school?" "Aren't you going to watch him while I'm at school?"

Mom: "No." "Looks like you're going to be needing a job to pay for daycare." "Not to mention his diapers, formula, clothes and whatever else he needs." "You want to be a mom so bad?" "Then take on all the responsibilities of a mother.

Daughter: "But that's not fair!"

by on Oct. 24, 2012 at 9:22 PM
Replies (11-20):
Beauty91805
by on Oct. 24, 2012 at 9:36 PM
Well its true. You can't expect the mom to be happy and take care of a responsibility that isn't hers.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
paganbaby
by Chesty La Rue on Oct. 24, 2012 at 9:37 PM

In this situation I don't know if those options are being made available to her.

How old were you?

Quoting kLynch315:

She can likely qualify for childcare assistance while in school. If not she could do online school. There are options. I was a teen mom, lived on my own with my bf, and didn't expect anyone to raise my Child. It can be done and I don't blame the mom. My mom said the same things!


Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

JJSMOMMYxox
by on Oct. 24, 2012 at 9:38 PM

If your old enough to have sex, your old enough to deal with the consequences.

kLynch315
by Member on Oct. 24, 2012 at 9:40 PM
1 mom liked this
I was 17 which is a little different. I'd hope the mom at least would support her in some sense, and maybe they have those schools for teen mom's there. The 15 year old needs to seek out the pregnancy crisis hotline to help assist her in her options since mom won't.

Quoting paganbaby:

In this situation I don't know if those options are being made available to her.

How old were you?

Quoting kLynch315:

She can likely qualify for childcare assistance while in school. If not she could do online school. There are options. I was a teen mom, lived on my own with my bf, and didn't expect anyone to raise my Child. It can be done and I don't blame the mom. My mom said the same things!


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paganbaby
by Chesty La Rue on Oct. 24, 2012 at 9:41 PM

Yes, but do you think it's possible for a 15 year old to actually do everything her mom outlined?

Quoting JJSMOMMYxox:

If your old enough to have sex, your old enough to deal with the consequences.


Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

RitaTequila531
by Member on Oct. 24, 2012 at 9:42 PM
1 mom liked this
Yeah, For some reason the last part wasn't going thru. :0)
I watch a lot of "teen mom", so I know that's a possible option.


Quoting paganbaby:

Ah, I see you edited it. Very good. My sister went to one of those schools. They had a onsite daycare that the girls too turns working in. And along with regular school, they had mandatory parenting classes and work study programs.

Quoting RitaTequila531:

Those are the plain facts, Mom isn't sugar coating anything.
The daughter chose to have sex .... an outcome is a possible pregnancy.
What's not fair is the Mom being forced to be burdened. She has a life to live and things of her own to do.
Reality is harsh sometimes.

If I were Mom, I'd help get her into a program where she can go to school while her child is in daycare in the same school.


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paganbaby
by Chesty La Rue on Oct. 24, 2012 at 9:43 PM

That's great! Did you work or go to school? And are you still with the father?

I agree. I think the mom is being unreasonably unsupported and she needs to find that support somewhere.

Quoting kLynch315:

I was 17 which is a little different. I'd hope the mom at least would support her in some sense, and maybe they have those schools for teen mom's there. The 15 year old needs to seek out the pregnancy crisis hotline to help assist her in her options since mom won't.

Quoting paganbaby:

In this situation I don't know if those options are being made available to her.

How old were you?

Quoting kLynch315:

She can likely qualify for childcare assistance while in school. If not she could do online school. There are options. I was a teen mom, lived on my own with my bf, and didn't expect anyone to raise my Child. It can be done and I don't blame the mom. My mom said the same things!



Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

CBMMOM
by Member on Oct. 24, 2012 at 9:46 PM


Quoting paganbaby:

Yes, but do you think it's possible for a 15 year old to actually do everything her mom outlined?

Quoting JJSMOMMYxox:

If your old enough to have sex, your old enough to deal with the consequences.


I doubt she could,which is why her mom is pushing for adoption. If mom doesn't want to take care of another baby ,maybe she shouldn't have one.  Oh wait,she didn't.

Meg2011425
by Member on Oct. 24, 2012 at 9:47 PM
If I were the 15 year old I would leave my mom. Because for the girl the moms pushing her daughter and the daughters pushing her mom away. It's sad and yes she had sex and got pregnant, she does need to grow up but I think the mom could have handled it a little differently.
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paganbaby
by Chesty La Rue on Oct. 24, 2012 at 9:47 PM


Quoting CBMMOM:


Quoting paganbaby:

Yes, but do you think it's possible for a 15 year old to actually do everything her mom outlined?

Quoting JJSMOMMYxox:

If your old enough to have sex, your old enough to deal with the consequences.


I doubt she could,which is why her mom is pushing for adoption. If mom doesn't want to take care of another baby ,maybe she shouldn't have one.  Oh wait,she didn't.

Absolutely, I agree. But is she taking into account her daughters mental state should she be "forced" to give her baby up?

Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

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