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I never know what to say

Posted by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 1:25 PM
  • 8 Replies

My dad and step mom took us to breakfast today. Anway, they said before we left...now just so  you know there is a black waitress there and we always hug her neck.  I said okay.....not a problem. She said well we just like to tell people in case they wonder why. I said. uhm, that's not a problem for us.

SMH, I don't get it...so what? Hug who you want.  

I never knew my dad was a bit racist until these later years...it isn't like he discriminates but it is little comments like above. Or, well he is black but he is nice or....now she's a black woman but she is good at........

I don't remember him being that way when I grew up. He was in the military and so we grew up to be accepting of all races, religions etc. It was just a part of life.  I never knew he had these tendencies, unless it is my step mom's influence throughout their 18 years of marriage...??? could that be it or could he have hid these tendencies all my life. 


People are people, regardless of race, religion, sexual orientation etc...I just don't get it.

by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 1:25 PM
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Replies (1-8):
Kris_PBG
by Representative on Nov. 23, 2012 at 8:38 PM
1 mom liked this

That is odd!  I wonder why he voices those views now and wonder where they came from...

hayliedlr
by JoAnna on Nov. 23, 2012 at 9:15 PM
1 mom liked this

makes ya wonder

Thelmama
by Thelma on Nov. 23, 2012 at 9:21 PM

Yes it does.  I don't really get why people treat people different because of the aforementioned reasons or even think less of someone. I honestly, do not get it.  People are PEOPLE. Plain and simple...we are all humans.  Maybe there are some things we can't ever understand.  Okay, now I gotta go rewrap my wrist...can type without the ace bandage but it hurts more...lol

Quoting hayliedlr:

makes ya wonder


Kmakksmom
by Stefanie on Nov. 24, 2012 at 12:55 AM

That is interesting!  My dad is the same way though...and I KNOW it's because of my evil stepmother.  He wasn't like that when my mom and him were married.  He did a lot of awful things, but being racist *and killing someone other than in the war* wasn't two of them.  My mom raised me well in the midst of all of that.  She taught me that people are people and has always been the opposite of racist.  My kids and I have been too.  She is also not homophobic, something that she taught me early on as well, and that I have passed on to my kids.  Now Leigh's family on the other hand...whew.  They can be racist and homophobic.  Just goes to show how differently people are raised.

Thelmama
by Thelma on Nov. 24, 2012 at 10:17 AM

True people are raised so different. Thing is my step mom is a sweetheart except for those comments etc...I don't think my dad's mom had a racist bone in her body. However, what little I remember of my grandfather he was very racist.  But he died when I was 4, so maybe it stems in my dad from that.  I will be having a talk with my kids without saying why, about how we treat others...act like it is just a gee whiz conversation.

Quoting Kmakksmom:

That is interesting!  My dad is the same way though...and I KNOW it's because of my evil stepmother.  He wasn't like that when my mom and him were married.  He did a lot of awful things, but being racist *and killing someone other than in the war* wasn't two of them.  My mom raised me well in the midst of all of that.  She taught me that people are people and has always been the opposite of racist.  My kids and I have been too.  She is also not homophobic, something that she taught me early on as well, and that I have passed on to my kids.  Now Leigh's family on the other hand...whew.  They can be racist and homophobic.  Just goes to show how differently people are raised.


suziSunshine678
by Member on Nov. 24, 2012 at 4:35 PM

very interesting -

i was an army brat - we lived together - black and whites - and i never remember my father being prejudiced - in fact, we were never reared that way - we were all equal - color was never an indication of one's character - and that is what one would judge you on -

well, many years later, after i was married and my parents came to visit us -had just moved into a new housing development and my husband took a bottle of fine liquor to the head of the construction company who was in charge of the development - for a Christmas gift- my father almost croaked - his prejudice came out in full force  - he could not believe that we would even associate with a "colored person" - omg - where in the merry hell was he coming from?  i didn't even know this man anymore - i shot my mother a look - and she just rolled her eyes -

this guy was super - our best friend - he couldn't do enough for us - of course, we treated him and his workers very well - and they, in turn, took very good care of us - you know, all the little details of moving into a new house - they put us right on the top of their schedule - we brought them coffee, donuts, iced tea - opened our home to them in the cold and and the summer when we had the A/C - t you would call, a very good working relationship with our supervisor and his crew and we became friends, in the process - they were always very good to us and we, in turn, let them always know how very much we appreciated their efforts -

 

 

 

 

 

 

so, at Christmas time, we wanted to show our appreciation to this man for his friendliness and help that he had shown us all year - we also thanked those who worked under him, as well -

well, that evening, after my husband returned home, i had a "come to Jesus meeting" with my daddy - things were never the same between us after that -

i had no idea who this man was - but, he was NOT the daddy who i grew up with - i have no idea where he went off the track!!

sadly,

suzi - i lost my daddy because of this incident - we were never the same after that night -

 

 

Thelmama
by Thelma on Nov. 24, 2012 at 4:40 PM

That is sad.  I just bite my tongue since I am in their home.  He is 76 years old, I don't forsee anything changing. He is in failing health, so I figure sometimes, like in my situtation it is best to leave it alone and teach the kids my way.  But it is sad because people lose out on many beautiful friendships because of prejudice.

Quoting suziSunshine678:

very interesting -

i was an army brat - we lived together - black and whites - and i never remember my father being prejudiced - in fact, we were never reared that way - we were all equal - color was never an indication of one's character - and that is what one would judge you on -

well, many years later, after i was married and my parents came to visit us -had just moved into a new housing development and my husband took a bottle of fine liquor to the head of the construction company who was in charge of the development - for a Christmas gift- my father almost croaked - his prejudice came out in full force  - he could not believe that we would even associate with a "colored person" - omg - where in the merry hell was he coming from?  i didn't even know this man anymore - i shot my mother a look - and she just rolled her eyes -

this guy was super - our best friend - he couldn't do enough for us - of course, we treated him and his workers very well - and they, in turn, took very good care of us - you know, all the little details of moving into a new house - they put us right on the top of their schedule - we brought them coffee, donuts, iced tea - opened our home to them in the cold and and the summer when we had the A/C - t you would call, a very good working relationship with our supervisor and his crew and we became friends, in the process - they were always very good to us and we, in turn, let them always know how very much we appreciated their efforts -

 

 

 

 

 

 

so, at Christmas time, we wanted to show our appreciation to this man for his friendliness and help that he had shown us all year - we also thanked those who worked under him, as well -

well, that evening, after my husband returned home, i had a "come to Jesus meeting" with my daddy - things were never the same between us after that -

i had no idea who this man was - but, he was NOT the daddy who i grew up with - i have no idea where he went off the track!!

sadly,

suzi - i lost my daddy because of this incident - we were never the same after that night -

 

 


PurpleHazey
by Angie on Nov. 24, 2012 at 9:08 PM
1 mom liked this


Quoting Kris_PBG:

That is odd!  I wonder why he voices those views now and wonder where they came from...

love it

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