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The doctor just assumed that......

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.....my children have multiple fathers.  I went in for an appt for depression and when she was asking me questions she asked if I was a single mother. I said yes.  She asked how many kids do I have and I said four. Then she asked if I get support from any of the fathers.  My mouth just dropped.  I have never had a doctor just assume that.  Usually they will ask about a father and if you want to offer up any more information then you as a patient will do that.


Also before that I had told the nurse don't mind my hair (I was embarrassed because I put this leave-in conditioner in my hair and it made my hair greasy) so I just mentioned that to the nurse so she didn't just think I didn't shower (I am very self conscious) and she said she didn't notice anything other than it being super shiny but "I don't ever put stuff like that in my hair because I'm educated".  I don't really know why she had to say that. 

I don't think there was ever a time when I was offended by something to trivial but this made me think.


EDIT: Yes they all have the same dad (the title is continued with the first sentence of the op) and I am still married.  I put on the paper work that I was separated

by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 8:12 AM
Replies (31-40):
Thelmama
by Thelma on Nov. 28, 2012 at 9:38 AM
2 moms liked this

Hey your post made the headliners on the main page, with a picture, cool.

MorganTho
by Member on Nov. 28, 2012 at 9:40 AM

They both sound really rude! I can't believe they would treat a patient like that!!!!!

CookieMom108
by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 9:42 AM
3 moms liked this

 I would take the doctors question about whether you get support from the fathers as being a valid question.  You went in there as you said for depression.  You told her you are a single mom of 4 kids and you said yourself they have different dads.  So she was asking if you get support, and I take that to mean support as in....do you get a break....are they involved.....emotional support....things like that.  Unless I'm misunderstanding something, I don't see anything wrong with her question. 

As for the nurse, that's a totally odd comment.  It's not even relevant to hair conditioner! lol.  I would've asked her what she meant by that, and hope she just meant to say something else and flubbed her wording.  If not and she repeated it and really meant to say uneducated, then I don't even know what I'd respond with but it wouldn't be nice.

hayliedlr
by JoAnna on Nov. 28, 2012 at 9:42 AM


Quoting Dinimon:

That's funny, I'm an educated cosmetologist and I put leave in conditioner in my hair.

so is my mom and she is the one that told me to try it.

hayliedlr
by JoAnna on Nov. 28, 2012 at 9:46 AM
1 mom liked this

I know I just saw that lol

Quoting Thelmama:

Hey your post made the headliners on the main page, with a picture, cool.


Mrs.Brugger
by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 9:47 AM

Rude. rude rude rude. Both of them.

shortycmlb
by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 9:49 AM

I'd be Dr. shopping. I <3 my ob/nurses. They love me lol but I would never tolerate that. Totally unprofessional.

hayliedlr
by JoAnna on Nov. 28, 2012 at 9:49 AM
2 moms liked this

they don't have different dads I never said that they didn't have diff dads

Quoting CookieMom108:

 I would take the doctors question about whether you get support from the fathers as being a valid question.  You went in there as you said for depression.  You told her you are a single mom of 4 kids and you said yourself they have different dads.  So she was asking if you get support, and I take that to mean support as in....do you get a break....are they involved.....emotional support....things like that.  Unless I'm misunderstanding something, I don't see anything wrong with her question. 

As for the nurse, that's a totally odd comment.  It's not even relevant to hair conditioner! lol.  I would've asked her what she meant by that, and hope she just meant to say something else and flubbed her wording.  If not and she repeated it and really meant to say uneducated, then I don't even know what I'd respond with but it wouldn't be nice.


bloomsr
by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 9:50 AM
Wtf was the nurses comment!?! I would be SO offended!! This entire office sounds like a sham to me!! I'm sorry you were treated so poorly in a place that should be offering judgement free support and council!
Maevelyn
by Member on Nov. 28, 2012 at 9:52 AM
4 moms liked this

The nurse was offensive but when you are being treated for depression, they need to know what your full situation is and they have to ask personal questions. I think the dr was just doing her job.

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