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The doctor just assumed that......

Posted by   + Show Post children have multiple fathers.  I went in for an appt for depression and when she was asking me questions she asked if I was a single mother. I said yes.  She asked how many kids do I have and I said four. Then she asked if I get support from any of the fathers.  My mouth just dropped.  I have never had a doctor just assume that.  Usually they will ask about a father and if you want to offer up any more information then you as a patient will do that.

Also before that I had told the nurse don't mind my hair (I was embarrassed because I put this leave-in conditioner in my hair and it made my hair greasy) so I just mentioned that to the nurse so she didn't just think I didn't shower (I am very self conscious) and she said she didn't notice anything other than it being super shiny but "I don't ever put stuff like that in my hair because I'm educated".  I don't really know why she had to say that. 

I don't think there was ever a time when I was offended by something to trivial but this made me think.

EDIT: Yes they all have the same dad (the title is continued with the first sentence of the op) and I am still married.  I put on the paper work that I was separated

by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 8:12 AM
Replies (371-373):
by Member on Dec. 3, 2012 at 6:09 AM

New doctor for sure. 

by on Dec. 3, 2012 at 2:58 PM

I became a single mom to my 2 boys when they were 22 months and 3 months old. It is now 24 years later, and through the years, you would be AMAZED at the number of ppl that have ASSUMED they have different fathers. They do not.

I have learned not to let it offend me anymore (yes, even now, it happens on occasion). It's obviousy a stigma that's attached to us single mammas. I just politely correct ppl when they make that assumption.

That said, if I had an experience like yours at the doctors office (especially the weird, snooty nurse), the next time they heard from me would be when I was having my records transferred to a different medical provider.

Best of luck to you and Happy Holidays!!!

by on Dec. 3, 2012 at 3:19 PM

What a jerk! When I went to the ob when I was pregnant with my second baby, the ob said "So, what do you want to do about this?" What the hell?

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