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i feel like i am the worlds worst mother

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i have 2 children, 2 and 3 years. when i had my first i have neva felt happier or prouder but i didnt feel the same way with my second, i love him and he was wanted but it just wasnt the same. he is a lovely sweet little boy but he is such hard work, he does things he knows he's not allowed and i have to tell him a hundred time every day, my oldest was never like that, my youngest also still puts everything in his mouth, he is clever and always learing new things, he just hasn't learnt what not to do. i always end up shouting at him because he just doesnt listen to anything, i feel like i want to spend more one on one time with my oldest who is very placid and who i can take anywhere without a worry. even walking past the dog my youngest wil make sure to stand on his tail or paw. i feel so bad because i do love him i just find him very hard work

by on Jan. 5, 2013 at 5:12 PM
Replies (21-24):
lostosbourne
by Audi on Jan. 9, 2013 at 9:12 AM

My older son was how your youngest is. He was always into everything and I never had a moments peace. He crawled at 5 mo and climbed onto the table at 7 mo and walked on his 9 mo b-day. He climbed out of his crib at a year old and while I was sleeping (it was naptime & I was sick so I layed down) he managed to open the front door, take his baby trike and get down an entire flight of stairs. (we lived on the 2nd floor & the stairs were outside but enclosed) I woke up in a panic to find him tooling around on his trike in the parking lot. He has been a huge challenge to me but he is very intelligent. In 5th grade he took an entire computer apart and put it back together. He was in the newspaper cuz he did this at school). So I believe that children who are into everything and always busy are the most intelligent. Not saying that others are not intelligent but there is just something about the ones who are. My sons are now 23 and 21 and my oldest has a great job doing what he loves (he is a welder which is his dream job), he has his own place and his own car and is making a life with his gf and puppy. So I completely understand where you are coming from. He is probably just a very intelligent child and needs more mental stimulation. He might be bored? thats just my opinion. Maybe try to do stuff with him to exercise his mind and keep him busy. See if that works. I wish you all the best. 

Audi aka LostOsbourne

erikadi
by Member on Jan. 16, 2013 at 3:10 PM

There is nothing wrong with wanting to be with the easier child. The first child is very special because that is your first. Don't be hard on yourself. You still love both of them. Each child is different and that is ok. Hopefully he will become easier to handle once he is older.

Meena20
by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 5:46 PM
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dinc
by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:13 PM

Children are all different.  Each one has his own personality. 

My first child was an easy baby.  The second was the baby from hell.  He didn't sleep or eat and was very difficult to make happy. 

They are different people.  You will be ok.  I think it gets easier as they get older. 

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