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What are you thoughts on....kinda long

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I have a friend who (is living with us and her 2 kids).  She is on disability and food stamps (no CS yet) her kids are teens.  My friends parents who are disabled (dad stroke, mom almost blind) moved out to Colorado (from FL) to live NEAR their "more well off and favorite daughter".  Well things did not work out the way they had planned as their daughter did not have time to help take care of them and they can't stand the cold.  So the well off daughter has paid for an airplane ticket for my friend to fly out there and pick up the parents and drive back here for them to live together again.  The parents between both of them make over 3000 a month. 

So my friend who cannot work because of RA and bone on bone spine was told that even though she would be responsible for all the chores, taking them to the dr, going to the store, and anything else that might come up she has to pay 1/2 of everything. 

She makes just over 800 a month on disability.  That is why she is living with us, she cannot afford to live on her own with her kids. 

Now while I am a firm believer in if your healthy, abled bodied, you work a minimum wage job yada yada yada if your gonna live with your parents I think you should help out with chores and stuff and help with the bills etc. 

She wants to try to get a car of her own, because she isn't sure if her parents will let her use the car outside of their needs. 

She is greatful beyond words that her parents are moving back, and she will finally have her own place so to speak. 

Her half of the bills would come to around 600 a month.  (including cable that she DOES NOT want, but dad has to have).  that leaves her a little over 200 a month to buy the things she and her kids need plus meds and dr visits and her cell phone. 

Not to mention when they move back in she has to buy beds for her and the kids, dressers and linens. 

Not a rant or bitching just saying what is going on and wanting thoughts on the situation.


I don't know whether to believe her or not about all the things her mother is saying she is going to have to do.  I just can't see a parent being so demanding, blind, uncaring I could go on (oh I know there are some out there).  Either her mother is really just a hateful spiteful bitch or she really is clueless about what kind of money she gets every month. 

She told me some more today after she talked to her mother, now she is twisting it around that they are moving back to help HER because she is a lazy ass and got herself into this mess and can't dig her own self out.  Sorry not much you can do with less than 900 a month.  She is already making herself sick over it, I almost told her not to do it and stay with us.  I am already at my wits end.  We are on week 2 of the flu running thru the house.  DH has it now.  I am tired, no scratch that, I am exhausted!!!  I cant take it anymore but I hate the thought of her mother treating her like that and her already being ready to kill her, or her having to go to Lakeview (mental health) because she can't take the stress.  I don't know how much to believe, if she is saying it to get attention, for me to feel pity for her or what.  arrgghhhh

by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 3:54 PM
Replies (31-32):
by on Jan. 21, 2013 at 8:53 AM

She doesn't have to live with them. The parents can afford a care giver so let them pay their own. That is taking advantage of people by them doing that. It would be different if your friend wasnt disabled. 

by Liz on Jan. 21, 2013 at 8:00 PM
That's a tough situation...I wish her the best of luck...
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