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He punished my 6 year old for What??

Posted by on Jul. 27, 2013 at 1:32 PM
  • 44 Replies

My sister in law, cousin and I got together to have a girls night out. We sent our kids to my house with dh and fil while the us three stayed at her house. So there was the two 13 year olds (one was mine) 8yo ds, 7yo cousin, 6yo dd and 3yo niece. My dh had to go to work so that left my fil in charge for the rest of the night.

Late that night, Fil calls me and says he's not going to watch Audi (my 6yo) anymore because she's having attitude probelms all day. When I got home and found out the whole story, I was PISSED.

It started with the pool. All the kids were playing in the pool when 3yo neice started bothering my 6yo. Audi told her to go away repeatedly but she didn't listen so she pushed her away (the 3yo floated a few feet away with no injury) Fil came unglued and made her stay out for the rest of the time. Edit: I agree that she shouldn't have pushed her. But at the same time, Fil shouldn't have let the situation get out of hand. When he saw her bothering dd he should have redirected her.

At home 3yo wanted to bring some rocks in the house. Fil said it was okay but Audi grabbed them away, threw them outside and made 3yo cry. Fil told her to go to her room for 10 mins. (That's fine with me) She's in her room when 3yo opens the door. Audi yells at her to go away. 3yo stays and keeps trying to come in. Fil scolds Audi and tells her to let 3yo in and play with her. Audi refuses and slams the door shut. Fil becomes very angry and makes her stay in her room for the rest of the night. That's when he called me to let me know he wouldn't be babysitting anymore.

by on Jul. 27, 2013 at 1:32 PM
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Replies (1-10):
calimom1123
by Bronze Member on Jul. 27, 2013 at 2:10 PM
2 moms liked this
Your 6yo sounds like a very defiant child. I wouldnt want to watch a kid that doesnt listen either. She could seriously injure a child by pushing in a pool. Thats not something we take lighly and we all know kids never tell the whole story,especially at 6. Sorry but it sounds like she was acting like a brat. She should be punished at home for disobeying grandpa.
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catevincesmom
by on Jul. 27, 2013 at 3:36 PM
1 mom liked this

I agree.  She really could have hurt a child pushing 'em around a pool like that.   And it does sound like dd had a lil bit too much attitude.


Quoting calimom1123:

Your 6yo sounds like a very defiant child. I wouldnt want to watch a kid that doesnt listen either. She could seriously injure a child by pushing in a pool. Thats not something we take lighly and we all know kids never tell the whole story,especially at 6. Sorry but it sounds like she was acting like a brat. She should be punished at home for disobeying grandpa.


 

polkaspots
by Bronze Member on Jul. 27, 2013 at 3:46 PM
3 moms liked this
It seems like it was clear that your dd didn't want to play with the 3 yo. There were four other kids that the little one could play with and your fil should have just kept the three year old away from her instead of punishing her a second time. Pushing her was wrong, but she was punished appropriately for that. I agree that she shouldn't have been punished again for simply not wanting to play with a toddler.
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amonkeymom
by Amy on Jul. 27, 2013 at 4:16 PM
1 mom liked this

I don't think the punishment was out of line, but I do think your FIL could've handled it better, especially when she was already in the room for punishment and the 3 year old kept coming in.

My opinion is that FIL should've let your daughter finish her punishment and he should have redirected the 3 year old to do something else.  

paganbaby
by Chesty La Rue on Jul. 27, 2013 at 4:24 PM

They were both in the water when dd pushed 3yo cousin away after telling her repeatedly to leave her alone. I'm not quite seeing how injury could have occurred?

Quoting calimom1123:

Your 6yo sounds like a very defiant child. I wouldnt want to watch a kid that doesnt listen either. She could seriously injure a child by pushing in a pool. Thats not something we take lighly and we all know kids never tell the whole story,especially at 6. Sorry but it sounds like she was acting like a brat. She should be punished at home for disobeying grandpa.


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paganbaby
by Chesty La Rue on Jul. 27, 2013 at 4:34 PM

Fil didn't want to be bothered and felt like dd was wrong for not wanting to play with her cousin. I asked him why he didn't redirect 3yo in the first place and he said, dd should have been playing with her.

I still don't agree about her getting out of the pool for the rest of the time over pushing her away. Mainly because it happened in the water while 3yo was wearing floaties. It wasn't a saftey hazard. Had she pushed down her when they were out of the pool, or dunked her, splashed her face, ect, then yeah I would have made her stay out.

Quoting polkaspots:

It seems like it was clear that your dd didn't want to play with the 3 yo. There were four other kids that the little one could play with and your fil should have just kept the three year old away from her instead of punishing her a second time. Pushing her was wrong, but she was punished appropriately for that. I agree that she shouldn't have been punished again for simply not wanting to play with a toddler.


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paganbaby
by Chesty La Rue on Jul. 27, 2013 at 4:39 PM

I agree.

Quoting amonkeymom:

I don't think the punishment was out of line, but I do think your FIL could've handled it better, especially when she was already in the room for punishment and the 3 year old kept coming in.

My opinion is that FIL should've let your daughter finish her punishment and he should have redirected the 3 year old to do something else.  


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paganbaby
by Chesty La Rue on Jul. 27, 2013 at 4:41 PM

I feel like I'm missing something here....They were both in the water and 3yo was wearing a ring plus arm floaties.

Quoting catevincesmom:

I agree.  She really could have hurt a child pushing 'em around a pool like that.   And it does sound like dd had a lil bit too much attitude.


Quoting calimom1123:

Your 6yo sounds like a very defiant child. I wouldnt want to watch a kid that doesnt listen either. She could seriously injure a child by pushing in a pool. Thats not something we take lighly and we all know kids never tell the whole story,especially at 6. Sorry but it sounds like she was acting like a brat. She should be punished at home for disobeying grandpa.




Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Breastfeeding tickers

marchantmom06
by Bronze Member on Jul. 27, 2013 at 6:03 PM
4 moms liked this
Your child was being a brat. She needs to learn to keep her hands to herself and not hit. She needs to learn to not take and throw away other people's things and she needs to learn when you have company then you suck it up and play and share. If it had been me she wouldn't have gotten so many chances.
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polkaspots
by Bronze Member on Jul. 27, 2013 at 6:33 PM
2 moms liked this
I wouldn't have kicked her out of the pool, I would have tried to send the younger one's attention elsewhere after making your dd sit out for a little while. Pushing is still wrong even if it wasn't dangerous. Even for a six year old. Consistency with the whole violence is bad thing is important, especially when it's directed at someone much smaller. I probably would have given her a five or ten minute time out, depending on how she reacted.
I disagree that she should have been playing with her cousin. It would have been nice, but it hardly seems sensible to make a kid play with someone they don't want to. The point of playing is to have fun, which can't be forced.


Quoting paganbaby:

Fil didn't want to be bothered and felt like dd was wrong for not wanting to play with her cousin. I asked him why he didn't redirect 3yo in the first place and he said, dd should have been playing with her.

I still don't agree about her getting out of the pool for the rest of the time over pushing her away. Mainly because it happened in the water while 3yo was wearing floaties. It wasn't a saftey hazard. Had she pushed down her when they were out of the pool, or dunked her, splashed her face, ect, then yeah I would have made her stay out.

Quoting polkaspots:

It seems like it was clear that your dd didn't want to play with the 3 yo. There were four other kids that the little one could play with and your fil should have just kept the three year old away from her instead of punishing her a second time. Pushing her was wrong, but she was punished appropriately for that. I agree that she shouldn't have been punished again for simply not wanting to play with a toddler.



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