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Just needed to get this out...*SAD*

Posted by on Dec. 29, 2013 at 5:38 PM
  • 10 Replies

OK....so this is a sad post but currently right now I have no one to talk to about it and I just need to get it out...


Back in October, I had to put my 13 year old cat down. She had stopped eating and was losing weight. Upon taking her to the vet, it was discovered that she had a lump in her stomach (more than likely a tumor) and was showing signs of kidney failure. She was also starting to throw up a really dark looking stuff (vet said it was probably blood) and the only thing that could help would have been stomach surgery....but only after running approx $600 in tests to see what exactly was wrong so they would know what to look for. There was no way I had that kind of money and I knew while I was in the process of getting it, she would be slowly starving to death. I couldn't imagine my little baby starving and suffering like that so I chose to have her put down.

Immediately after (and even now) I felt a tremendous amount of guilt...I felt like I didn't do everything possible to help her. I didn't ask the vet if he would do a payment plan or anything. I feel like I killed her. I ended her life before it was her time.I stayed with her the whole time and was petting her through it. But I didn't actually say goodbye, I didn't tell her I loved her, I didn't tell her what was going to happen. I was so upset and crying that my mind just didn't work. Now I can't go back and redo it and I just feel soooooo bad!!

I can't shake this feeling. Everyone has told me I did a good thing and I spared her more pain, but I just can't see it that way. I feel so bad I just don't know how to stop blaming myself and get over this!

Sorry this is so sad and depressing, I was looking through old pictures and found the last one I took of her and I just started bawling :'(

by on Dec. 29, 2013 at 5:38 PM
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Replies (1-10):
sjenkins8208
by New Member on Dec. 29, 2013 at 5:41 PM
1 mom liked this
Ooo I'm sorry! We had to put our 13 year old cat down after she got leukemia. It was horrible and the way she was on meds was NOT her life! She couldn't get up or use the litter box or eat. Sometimes you just have to remember why you did it. Because you loves your cat and it was not a life worth living.
CathySuperMom
by on Dec. 31, 2013 at 12:32 AM
1 mom liked this
Aww im so sorry poor bah bah cat. My cat got kicked in the vagina... But she lived. But god bless that cat. It sucks because you can never have a replacement of a pet.
jalikym
by Member on Dec. 31, 2013 at 9:58 AM
1 mom liked this

Big Hugs.  I am so sorry for your loss.  I have been there and I feel for you.  My heart breaks for you too.  It takes time to help when you lose a pet that you are so close to.  Try writing in a journal about your feelings.  In times when I am lost in my feelings it helps me to sort them out.  hugs again. 

merryvoice
by Bronze Member on Jan. 2, 2014 at 1:35 AM
3 moms liked this
I went through pretty much exactly the same thing this last July. Our 15 year old cat got really sick and we had to put her down. She had kidney failure as well, with a slew of other things. At the time, you won't feel like you did the right thing and I'm going to be just like everyone else, telling you that you really did so the right thing. I struggled with it too, not just with this kitty, but two before her. But when you think about it, you took away her suffering. There really aren't a lot of options when it comes to tumors and kidney failure; also starving to death. That is more cruel than putting them peacefully to sleep.

You can still tell her you love her, and that you're sorry. You can say good-bye. Do you have her ashes, or is she buried? You just have to find a way that works for you; for example, if you have her ashes, place her favorite toy by them, pet the box she's in (I know it sounds weird, but it worked for me), and tell her how much you love and miss her. When you think about it, it's pretty much the same as you saying it when they're alive, since they really can't understand your words. What they do understand is you being there, stroking their fur and being there in their final moments. You showed your kitty how much love you had, and that's what she was aware of.

All that being said, I am truly sorry for your loss. Please know you are not alone, and know that whe people say you did the right thing, you really really did. Most of us aren't talking out of our behinds! *hugs*
lunyuny
by on Jan. 2, 2014 at 10:06 AM
1 mom liked this
Loss is hard. You sound responsible and caring. I am sure you did what you could
RDeRo
by New Member on Jan. 2, 2014 at 10:42 AM
1 mom liked this
I think the guilt comes from not knowing what the outcome would have been if your cat would have had the surgery. It is hard to know when is the right time, but you are your cats advocate and know whats best. I am sure you made the right choice and put her out of any future misery. The fact that you were there petting her is all she needed, you were her loving companion until the end and that is what she needed. Its normal to grief, you just lost a friend, family member. Try not to feel guilty about your decision
dancingthrulife
by Member on Jan. 2, 2014 at 4:57 PM

aww hun... it was ok... animals are not helpless. she knew she was sick and she knew she was dying..

Lindalou907
by Bronze Member on Jan. 2, 2014 at 9:42 PM

I've been there, you did the right thing. Your kitty felt your love and care, believe me.

pharaoh555
by on Jan. 2, 2014 at 10:13 PM
After being in the pet business for over 20 years I can honestly tell you that vets are very good at making people feel guilty for "not doing enough". Pets are not people and they don,' think like people. They don't know that suffering through surgery and recovery may help them down the road. They know that they are suffering right now and want it to stop. People think in terms of what they would do and not what the animal would want. Prolonging a pets life is more for the sake of the pet owner than the pet. I think you did the right thing. She is no longer suffering.
Acid
by Member on Jan. 3, 2014 at 7:16 PM

Your cat got kicked in the vagina?

Was someone LOOKING for your cat's vaginal area?  It's not like it hangs out and is easily noticeable.

I've heard some strange shit on here....this comes close to taking the cake.  It sounds totally made up.

Quoting CathySuperMom: Aww im so sorry poor bah bah cat. My cat got kicked in the vagina... But she lived. But god bless that cat. It sucks because you can never have a replacement of a pet.


Only when the last tree has been cut down,
Only when the last river has been poisoned,
Only when the last fish has been caught,
Only then will you find that money cannot be eaten.

— Cree Indian Prophecy

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