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Advice please

Posted by on Apr. 12, 2014 at 9:43 PM
  • 14 Replies
What would you do if your kids father absolutly refused to see them not even for holidays or their birthdays?
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by on Apr. 12, 2014 at 9:43 PM
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Replies (1-10):
HIJKLM
by Member on Apr. 12, 2014 at 9:44 PM
What I did was file abandonment and had his rights removed
i.love.my.life
by Member on Apr. 12, 2014 at 9:44 PM
Is he paying child support?
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Roo1234
by Member on Apr. 12, 2014 at 9:45 PM
Stop asking and plan their lives accordingly.

If the kids ask, respond vaguely according to their age and apologize for not picking a better man to be their father
mamasheart2012
by Donna on Apr. 12, 2014 at 9:54 PM
yes he pays child support but only because its taken from his paycheck

Quoting i.love.my.life: Is he paying child support?
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mamasheart2012
by Donna on Apr. 12, 2014 at 9:58 PM
My 9 and 6 yr olds seem to not care. My 2 yr old doesnt understand and constantly cries for daddy

Quoting Roo1234: Stop asking and plan their lives accordingly.

If the kids ask, respond vaguely according to their age and apologize for not picking a better man to be their father
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jesusrocks2013
by Member on Apr. 12, 2014 at 10:03 PM

 

Quoting Roo1234: Stop asking and plan their lives accordingly. If the kids ask, respond vaguely according to their age and apologize for not picking a better man to be their father

 No, that is not the way to do it because it creates a feeling of uselessness " daddy does not care about me and daddy is useless as a parent so I am a useless child ".

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jesusrocks2013
by Member on Apr. 12, 2014 at 10:18 PM

flowers Never tell your child that his father does not want him/her  because it would be totally crushing him/her into a thousand pieces. My best advice to you would be to spend 100% of your time with him/her and let him/her know how much you love him/her unconditionally and endlessly , but never ever talk bad to him/her about him/her father because it will create a sense of emotional and mental confusion within the child and you don't want this to happen at all. My blessings to you and to your child too.

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mamasheart2012
by Donna on Apr. 12, 2014 at 10:30 PM
Thank you. My 9 and 6 yr olds are happy with just me. But my 2 yr old was a daddys girl and is heartbroken. Idk what to say to her.

Quoting jesusrocks2013:

flowers Never tell your child that his father does not want him/her  because it would be totally crushing him/her into a thousand pieces. My best advice to you would be to spend 100% of your time with him/her and let him/her know how much you love him/her unconditionally and endlessly , but never ever talk bad to him/her about him/her father because it will create a sense of emotional and mental confusion within the child and you don't want this to happen at all. My blessings to you and to your child too.

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i.love.my.life
by Member on Apr. 12, 2014 at 10:38 PM
Then just leave it alone. If you file abandonment, he doesn't have to pay child support.

Quoting mamasheart2012: yes he pays child support but only because its taken from his paycheck

Quoting i.love.my.life: Is he paying child support?
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CCarney
by on Apr. 13, 2014 at 12:00 AM

Stay strong.  Let him know what he is doing to the 2 year old, but don't count on him changing. If he has scheduled time that he is supposed to have them and he is not meeting that responsibility, you should notify the court.  

Acknowledge when she cries that you understand she misses Daddy, but he isn't here right now and you love her.  It will get better.  It will just take time.  Whatever you do, do not tell her that he doesn't want to see her or the others - even though that is what you want to say, it will not help.

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