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I need your opinion

Posted by on Apr. 30, 2014 at 1:20 PM
  • 10 Replies

ok its a long story.

ive been with my husband 9 years married four. he has three children from his previous relationship and two with me. plus hes raised my son from a previous relationship since he was two. now his daughter from the previous relationship( 21 years old )and i were really close the first five years. she would stay at my house every wkend, tell me things her father didnt know about and i would nt tell him because i didn't want to loose this bond with her. we would go shopping do girly things. ok one day a whole lot of money disappeared from our house she was there she helped us look all around for it never found it. then we moved and three different times hundreds of dollars disappeared we never found it then my jewelry started to disappear and the real jewelry not the fake. coinsently she was the only one in the house every time. I've even called her out  on the jewelry because there had been times i would walk into my room and she'd be nervous or my jewelry box would be open. my son at the time was three and he couldn't open my jewelry box, he didn't even reach it. i would tell her father but he'd say i better not find out my kids are stealing from us. approach it never.

his daughter would tell me at different times her father was cheating on me, talking to other girls on the phone while she was in the car. her n her mother would say leave him and wanted me to hook up with the mothers brother. i told him all of this and he never said anything to them.

i got pregnant with my daughter, my first child from him and his daughter got really jealous about it stopped coming around then told people i didnt want her around or didnt allow her around. which was bs. the only time she came around since i met her was for her bday and the holidays. then we were hearing from different pple that she would talk shit about us. when her father was incarcerated she was talking all this stuff on us that when i would go to her job not knowing any one there they knew who i was. he came home she started shit at my new years party telling our daughter inlaw that my sister and sister inlaw were talking shit about her. then it was confirmed to us by her brothers that she is the one who stole from us all those times and didn't care cause she got us.i was cheating on her father. and a whole bunch of other crap. now i spoke to my husband he didnt really respond to it i told him i would think he would be pist because your own child is stealing from you.talking shit about you trying to tear up our relationship .he made it seem like i was picking on her. one day she comes to my house i ask her to sit so i can talk to her. she denies everything of course. i told her she wasnt allowed in my house any more until she learned to respect me and i didnt want her round my kids either. she left crying. my husband and i stopped talking for two weeks cause of the whole situation  well basically he didnt want me to say anything to her. the day after this big argument i get a phone call from her brother and cousin to tell me she said she was going to put her hands on me i tell her father and again he doesnt respond so now we dont talk for another two weeks. she calls him with all these cheating lies and now he wants to have a meeting after i told him i wanted to do this from the beginning when we found out she stole and started this whole mess with my sister and sister inlaw. we all meet at my house all his boys and daughter in law show up we wait three hours and she never shows up he calls her she has a thousand excuses of why she cant come. he puts her on speaker she starts talking shit her mom starts commenting after i asked her to be there called her and left her messages she never responds but has so much to say on the phone when it has nothing to do with her. well the meeting ended really bad. i told him its ashame ive never mistreated any of his kids. ive loved them as if they were mine. i love them and care for them more than there mother. ive never stopped him from building a relationship with any of his kids even threw this mess. i told him he doesnt give me the place as his wife the mother to his other kids. he allows her to disrespect me and say nothing to her about it.

ok today on my way to work my husband tells me his daughter wants him to take our little daughter to her for a day. i tell him no i dont want her around my kids because all shes going to teach them is her nasty attitude and bad ways. he tells me he doesnt care that her sister. it didnt go any further becuase i needed to hang up. so i text him and tell him he can build his relationship with his daughter but leave me and the kids out of it.

WHAT DO YOU THINK? SHOUKD I LET THEM BE AROUND HER OR NOT? AM I OVER REACTING HERE?

by on Apr. 30, 2014 at 1:20 PM
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Replies (1-10):
amonkeymom
by Amy on Apr. 30, 2014 at 2:54 PM

That's hard but I can't tell you what you should do.  I don't think you're overreacting but at the same time, in some ways maybe you are.

It sounds like your husband and you need to sit down and get on the same page.

hayliedlr
by JoAnna on Apr. 30, 2014 at 4:07 PM


Quoting amonkeymom:

That's hard but I can't tell you what you should do.  I don't think you're overreacting but at the same time, in some ways maybe you are.

It sounds like your husband and you need to sit down and get on the same page.

I agree with this

Noni2319
by Chrissy on Apr. 30, 2014 at 4:27 PM
In sorry that's a very difficult situation to be in. You and your husband need to sit down and be on the same page about everything. Have his sons told him everything they told you?
RitaTequila531
by Member on Apr. 30, 2014 at 8:03 PM
This

Quoting amonkeymom:

That's hard but I can't tell you what you should do.  I don't think you're overreacting but at the same time, in some ways maybe you are.

It sounds like your husband and you need to sit down and get on the same page.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
143myboys9496
by Suzzanne on Apr. 30, 2014 at 8:21 PM

I can understand why you wouldn't want her around you or your children, or in your home. She stole from you AND your dh. 

Truthfully, you both really, really need to be on the same page. Is there a reason why, he's taking all of this lying down? I mean, she's accused both of you of cheating on each other..that's a pretty serious thing to say. 

She's getting something out of all the lies and stories. Even if it's a "you poor girl", she's getting some kind of attention out of it...may be negative, but sometimes negative attention is attention just the same. 

You and him need to have a super heart to heart.

cjsmom1
by Silver Member on May. 1, 2014 at 12:58 AM

You and your dh need to sit down and compromise about how to handle this situation. I'd be pissed at his dd too but he obviously isn't ready to deal with it

mysticalmalissa
by Bronze Member on May. 1, 2014 at 6:53 AM

I would leave the entire bunch far, far behind..including the husband.

Mrs.Rivera128
by Member on May. 6, 2014 at 4:51 PM

 no they have tried but he wont listen to them unless shes there supposedly. which i think is bs. he just doesnt want to.

Quoting Noni2319: In sorry that's a very difficult situation to be in. You and your husband need to sit down and be on the same page about everything. Have his sons told him everything they told you?

 

Mrs.Rivera128
by Member on May. 6, 2014 at 4:53 PM

hes not at all. supposedly he told her she isnt allowed to come to the house until she learns to respect me but i think its bs. hes saying that to shut me up. but im not.

Quoting cjsmom1:

You and your dh need to sit down and compromise about how to handle this situation. I'd be pissed at his dd too but he obviously isn't ready to deal with it

 

Mrs.Rivera128
by Member on May. 6, 2014 at 4:58 PM

 can you tell me where am i over reacting. im not coming at you i just want to know where cause i dont think i am. im just really frustrated about the whole situation. here's a girl that i met when she was 12. we were close did alot of things she didnt do with her mother. i treated her like mines and still do. she starts stealing from us and im talking over 7000 then all my jewelry. starts a whole bunch of bull between my husband and i. her brother and his wife. at her job. then tries to chump me. i dont see where im over reacting,

Quoting amonkeymom:

That's hard but I can't tell you what you should do.  I don't think you're overreacting but at the same time, in some ways maybe you are.

It sounds like your husband and you need to sit down and get on the same page.

 

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